als Page 515 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jake Plummer, Buzzsaw Soul Crusher
As we enter in to the biggest week of Denver quarterback Jake Plummer's life, leading up to the AFC Championship Game hosting the Pittsburgh Steelers, we feel obliged, as the only fans of The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals on the planet, to ask: How in the hell is this guy a game away from ...
The Curse Of Queen City
A beleaguered Cincinnati sports fan, still reeling from Carson Palmer's knee implosion and an ugly first-round playoff exit, implores us to feel his pain by reeling off the succession of brutal injuries to befall the Queen City at the worst possible times. Witness:...
Say It Ain't So, Chad
So you know, Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson — forever known as Our Hero around here — did not get in a fight with his coach Marvin Lewis at halftime of Sunday's loss to the Steelers. Who said he did, you ask?...
Engine No. 42 Makes The Hall
It's a happy day here at Deadspin headquarters: Former Cardinals closer Bruce Sutter has made the Hall of Fame. He was the only player elected to the Hall; Goose Gossage and others (including, unfortunately, Willie McGee) did not make it in....
NFL Playoff Roundup: Riiiiipppppp!
• Honestly, we know this was covered all weekend, but man, that Carson Palmer thing was the worst playoff moment we can remember. We think Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals have it tough; Bengals fans finally get in the playoffs, and two plays in, their Pro Bowl QB tears an ACL and MCL. (Quest...
Steelers vs. Bengals - 4th Quarter
• James Farrior comes up with an interception of Jon Kitna. And it's not the interception itself that's ending this game, but the tidal wave of momentum that appears to be on the Steelers side....
Steelers vs. Bengals - 3rd Quarter
• Bonnie Bernstein lets us know that Carson Palmer has a torn ACL, and the Bengals hope he'll be ready for training camp next year. Ouch. What a very Bengal thing to happen. You have my sympathy, Bengals fans....
Steelers vs. Bengals - 2nd Quarter
• The Steelers answer and grab a little bit of the momentum back with a touchdown via a Ben Roethlisberger to Willie Parker screen pass. 10-7 Bengals....
Steelers vs. Bengals - 1st Quarter
• Chad Johnson spent his time before the game hanging out in the parking lot with Bengals tailgaters. Hopefully, he's sober....
Playoff Pants Party: Steelers Vs. Bengals
For some reason, we're more excited about this playoff game than any of the others, though we know we're in the minority. We think it's because the NFL world is always happier and more in balance when you see teams like the Bengals — or the Texans, or the Lions, or (lo!) the Buzzsaw — make the playo...
Picking Up Where Chad Left Off
Since Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson has been so unfairly muffled all week, taking about 93 percent of the fun out of that Steelers-Bengals game, it has been up to fans to pick up his slack. One fan has come up with a great scenario....
The Tragic Muzzling Of Chad Johnson
Well, it's the week before the Cincinnati Bengals' first playoff game in 15 years, and they're hosting it, against the hated division rival Pittsburgh Steelers. Man, oh, man, wide receiver Chad Johnson must be going crazy, right? What's he gonna do? Score a touchdown and smelt some ore? Strap on B...
See? Highlights Are Harder Than They Look
Yes, yes, we know this is old — seven months old, in fact — but we only recently saw it, it's a slow holiday weekday and, besides, it's tremendously, brain-hurting funny....
Saying Goodbye To Tempe
No one on the planet noticed it on Saturday, but, as it turns out, another Cardinals team said goodbye to its stadium this year....
Elsewhere...
• College Basketball: Detroit 48, Louisville 56. "I'm not pleased with our improvement," Louisville head coach Rick Pitino said after the game. Hey, ya think? Meanwhile, this may be the best thing to happen to Detroit basketball since Dick Vitale left to take an NBA job in 1978. • Rugby: Stade Fra...
Clearing The 1 o'clock Table...
• San Diego 7, Kansas City 20. So, what did you use for pregame motivation, Marty, the tape of Jim Mora screaming, "PLAYOFFS? PLAYOFFS?!" I feel much pain. • Buffalo 37, Cincinnati 27. Rough day for Chad Johnson. First, someone stole his reindeer (I HATE YOU, whoever it was), and then, they lose to ...
Someone Stole Chad Johnson's Reindeer
Never will you see someone who just scored a touchdown walk to the sidelines with such dejection. Chad Johnson took one to the house against Buffalo, but could not find his reindeer afterwards....
A Beer Gut For A Beer City
We know it hasn't been the most productive offseason for our beloved St. Louis Cardinals, and we feared they would, in the face of growing public criticism in the face of a new stadium, make a rash deal just to say they're doing something. But jeez: We didn't think they'd start paying guys by the ...
Sweet Lord, Let Him Not Be Kidding
Last week, Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson disappointed us — and pretty much every sports fan we know — by scoring a touchdown and simply handing the ball back to the ref....
The Mind Of The Kentucky Fan
It's noon on a Saturday, you're a junior at the University of Kentucky and the game starts in two hours. You'll be close enough to the court that, if you hit just the right point, you could be on the TV. It's time to make your voice heard by the masses. But what to say? What to say?...