ap Page 1409 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Francesco Totti Starred In Front Of Roma Fans, For Perhaps The Final Time
Francesco Totti might be the most beloved athlete by his team’s fans in the world. At 39 he still plays for hometown club Roma, who he signed with as a 12-year-old in 1989. He is Roma’s captain—he was first named in 1998, 18 goddamn years ago—and holds numerous club and Serie A records....

Deadspin Up All Night: Always Cry For Love, Never Cry For Pain
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. RIP to the greatest....

Jonathan Papelbon Is Now "Johnny Jonathan"
Nationals reliever Jonathan Papelbon has acquired a new nickname: Johnny Jonathan. MASN reporter Dan Kolko unintentionally created the moniker by making a smooth transition from the studio to the field....

Stanley Johnson Thinks He's In LeBron's Head. Okay, Stan.
LeBron James spent large portions of Game 2 punking the Detroit Pistons. He dunked all over Reggie Bullock and let everyone know how awesome it felt, he stink-faced Marcus Morris for daring to leave him open, and he gave rookie Stanley Johnson a meaningful bump during a timeout:...

The Lazy, Inept Amateur's Guide To Lawn Care
Some years back, my wife and I moved out of our lovely condo in a pleasant D.C. suburb and into a repurposed garage space in my mom’s little rambler, with the goal of renting out our condo and saving enough money to eventually buy some real land. And it worked! Roughly 18 months of stifling near-mis...

Steve Clifford Reminds Reporters That Coaching Is More Complicated Than It Looks
The Hornets lost 103-115 to the Miami Heat this evening to fall behind 0-2 in their first round series. The Hornets had a top-ten defense in the regular season, but they’ve allowed Miami to score 238 points in their first two games. Naturally, someone asked Hornets coach Steve Clifford about whether...

Vintage Dwyane Wade Is Fun As Hell
It’s easy to forget how good Dwyane Wade can be. LeBron James was Miami’s best player during their title seasons, and Wade’s struggled with injuries for a few years. Since LeBron took his talents back to Ohio, Wade has had the highest usage rate on the Heat in both seasons, but he’s not the undisput...


Deadspin Up All Night: You Can Lean On My Arm As You Break My Heart
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Be easy....

UFC Boss Dana White Mad At Conor McGregor For Not Doing Some Dumb Bullshit
Yesterday, UFC featherweight champion Conor McGregor may or may not have retired; it isn’t clear. What is clear is that he won’t participate in a highly-anticipated rematch against Nate Diaz on July 9, unless he does. UFC figurehead Dana White went on The Herd with smooth-skinned ghoul Colin Cowherd...

Josh Norman's A Free Agent
The Carolina Panthers not only can’t agree to a long-term deal with cornerback Josh Norman, but they won’t even have him for the upcoming season. The team announced today that it has withdrawn its franchise tag offer, which makes Norman an unrestricted free agent....

Nearly Perfect: For One Night, Rex Chapman Was King
Michael Jordan made me hate basketball. That’s not supposed to be the effect of one of the greatest players of all time, not if he plays for your team or you’re a connoisseur of the sport. But for me, a young sports fan in South Florida who sort of understood basketball, I looked at Michael Jordan’s...

The Cardinals Lost Their Seventh Game
Cubs pitcher Jason Hammel spun six innings of one-run ball and drove in both of Chicago’s runs Tuesday for the club’s 2-1 win over the St. Louis Cardinals....

Acceptable Uses Of Snapchat's Bob Marley Filter
So Snapchat has chosen to celebrate 4/20 with a totally advisable Bob Marley filter that gives you blackface and dreadlocks. They’ll be pulling it and humbly apologizing any time now; I am typing this as fast as I can. Anyway, here are some experiments I’ve conducted. Thank you for your time, which ...

Harry The Hawk Crotched Himself
That ugly-ass Hawks-Celtics game was only made less painful to watch by an unfortunate pratfall from Atlanta’s mascot, who will not be fertilizing eggs anytime soon. Keep an eye on Harry’s tightrope routine at the bottom of the screen:...

ESPN Interviews One Of The Guys From "Meet Me In Temecula"
The Christmas season is all about peace on Earth, goodwill towards your neighbors, and defending the honor of your favorite basketball player by driving 35 minutes to go fight some chump who talked shit online. Two Christmases ago, Twitter user @MyTweetsRealAF made the drive down to Temecula, Ca. af...

That Terrible Celtics-Hawks Game, In One Play
The Hawks just took a 2-0 lead in their first round series with the Boston Celtics after a prehistoric, listless game. Avery Bradley didn’t play because of a hamstring injury, Kelly Olynynk missed the game with a shoulder problem, and the Hawks’ coolest player, Dennis Schröder, turned his ankle at t...

The Celtics Just Had The Worst First Quarter In NBA Playoff History
The Atlanta Hawks were held scoreless for the last five minutes and change of the first quarter of tonight’s playoff game against Boston, but that doesn’t matter because the shamrock boys just took a world historic shit and scored only seven points over the entire first period on 3-for-23 shooting. ...

Rex Ryan Introduces Donald Trump, A Man Who Has Also Failed A Lot In New York, At Rally
Bills head coach Rex Ryan showed up at Donald Trump’s rally Monday in Buffalo; it would be nice to think that the two joined forces by bonding over their important fathers giving them a step up in their careers. In Ryan’s introduction, he expressed admiration for Trump showing the courage to say wha...

Nearly Perfect: The Indiana Pacers Were A Vanished Ideal
The Indiana Pacers were a pretty, pretty basketball team. Do people know that now? It all came back at once, watching the bleary video of them facing the Bulls on Boxing Day of 1995. The in-game graphics reminded viewers that the Pacers had won the Central Division the year before—Michael Jordan’s b...