ass Page 286 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Deadspin Classic: Manute Bol, Always And Forever, Larger Than Life
Manute Bol died today at 47. In 2006, Rick Chandler caught up with him as he worked to bring relief to his native Sudan. "How can I stay in America and live a good life," Bol asked, "when my people are suffering?"...
Vince Young Lead Suspect In Dallas Strip Club Assault
"Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young is the prime suspect in a Saturday night assault at a Dallas strip club that left an individual with bodily injury, an official with the Dallas Police Department said Sunday." [CBS Dallas via SecondStringFullback]...
ESPN Gives Clint Dempsey Unfortunate Nickname
So that was fun, huh? The U.S. played to a draw today thanks in large part to Robert Green's colossal cock-up. Green is expected to be Temple of Doom'd by Capello later this evening. Next up: Slovenia, lower TV ratings....
Asshole Kids Try Their Best To Ruin Blackhawks Victory Parade
Reader Paul attended today's Blackhawks victory parade in downtown Chicago. Instead of seeing Patrick Kane get nice and toasty, he saw asshole teenagers doing what asshole teenagers do best: be asshole teenagers. His story, a video, and more photos after the jump....
Deadspin Classic: The Tiny Plastic Horn That Will Ruin The World Cup
That terrible sound you'll be hearing over the next few weeks is the vuvuzela, which Dash described last year as "South Africa's answer to the Thunderstick." His story is below....
Police Investigate Possible Sexual Assault At Green Bay Packers Party (UPDATE)
Seven Green Bay Packers were found at a rented condo where two women told police they were assaulted on Saturday morning. Six of the players were cleared, but one unnamed player is still under investigation....
Private Stache: Cassius Clay Has Blood On His Hands
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....
Goalie Booms 80-Yard Free Kick, Scores Goal
For your viewing pleasure, we present Lassi Hurskainen, a former UNC Asheville soccer player currently toiling in the Finnish minor leagues for division-leading Riverball FC, absolutely nailing the indirect free kick and catching his counterpart absurdly off-guard. [Goal; H/T Kenny]...
Chicago Monument Desecration Continues Unabated
A 2-0 lead in the Stanley Cup Finals has made the Blackhawks fans/statue vandals in Chicago drunk with power. They've moved on from a statue of a beloved sports icon to a statue of...something by Pablo Picasso. H/T Nick....
A Salute To Jose Canseco's Many Failures (Gallery)
Yesterday was the 17th anniversary of Jose Canseco taking a Carlos Martinez fly ball off the noggin for a home run. It was also the first anniversary of his MMA debut. Both are indelible moments in failuredom. Let's examine some Kanseco Klassics....
Maradona's Pot To Piss In Now Classy As All Get-Out
The Argentine boss demanded the standard toilets in his South Africa suite be replaced with two of "The World's Best Toilet Seat," just $449.95. Why two? One for the cocaine, obviously. [Daily Mail]...
Diarra Diarrhea Costs France A Midfielder
Lassana Diarra will miss the World Cup with what's euphemistically being called "a stomach ailment" or "intestinal pains." It must have been contagious when the entire team nearly shit the bed against Ireland. [AP]...
Watch The 1972 NBA One-On-One Championship, In All Its Glorious Weirdness
In 1972, the NBA had a one-on-one tournament for $15,000. They played by twos, to 20, win by four. There was a "take-it-out" line that was not the three-point line. The NBA: Where weird but sorta awesome used to happen....
Arkansas School For The Deaf's Team Nickname? The Leopards, Of Course
Why isn't it spelled "Leppard?" Other names considered by the ASFTD: "Jam," "Dumb and Blind," "Tones," "Arkansas School For The Deaf, Mos" [ASFTD]...
Fake Yo-Yo Trickster Fools Every TV Station Everywhere
A strange, strange man has been showing up on morning shows throughout the Midwest, claiming to be a yo-yo trick champion. He is not. He is actually terrible at yo-yo. Yet he keeps getting on the air....
Tell Me How My Class Tastes: Scenes From The Worst NFL Draft Party Ever
This is, on the surface, the tale of the lamest NFL Draft party of all time. But it's also a story about class and about fans who project their own anxieties on their favorite teams and about teams that respond in kind....
A Brief History Of The Greatest Twitter Hashtag Of All-Time
Sometimes, I wonder what we did in those dark years without the Internet and, more recently, without Twitter. Friday was one of those days, as I sifted through a Twitter search for a hashtag dubbed "WireDerbyHorseNames." Warning: Omar's coming, yo....
Wince-Inducing Story Of The Day: Miguel Olivo Has A Urethra Of Steel
The Rockies catcher passed a kidney stone during a recent game against the Diamondbacks, then he threw his gear back on and later singled. "I can handle pain a little bit," he said. "Let's play baseball." [Last Angry Fan]...
Soccer Player Screws Up Royally, Joins Group Of Elite Soccer Royal Screwer-Uppers
Kansas City BulletsWizards striker Kei Kamara had an early opportunity in a recent match against the LA Galaxy and proceeded to fall on his ass and get called for a handball. Anything for a laugh....
An American Player Lands A Haymaker, And Chinese Basketball Has Its Kermit Washington Moment
In Game 2 of the CBA finals Sunday night, Xinjiang Flying Tiger Charles Gaines, of Southern Mississippi decked Guangdong's Du Feng in apparent retaliation for a headbutt. The freakout has already begun, if Google translation is to be believed....