duan Page 182 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Golfer Wins First LPGA Event, Honor Of Being Molested By Frenchmen
Congratulations to Evian Masters winner Ai Miyazato, whose reward is this unsettling photographic commentary on the French libido, golf's patriarchy, modern Orientalism and the staggering inability of women's golf to devise a trophy that doesn't seem vaguely cocklike....
In Celebration Of A Hall Of Fame Yente
In some countries, marriages are arranged. But in America — where love reigns supreme — Rickey Henderson has the power vested in him to unite man and woman, reports this piece of cardboard....
Attendance Should Be A Record High For This Giveaway
The Royals need a worthwhile promotion to draw fans in August. Figurines are too conventional. There must be something else. Hmm. Tough one. How 'bout urine?...
Sumo Cycling: The Next Great Olympic Sport
Perhaps Lance Armstrong would secretly like his teammate Alberto Contador to be pinned down by this extremely zealous fan, so he can win an eighth race....
This Woman Is Prepared For Everything
This photo was sent from Wednesday night's Yankees game courtesy of our shrimp-loving compadres at Walkoff Walk. I love this picture. She's like a walking Photo Hunt....
And Then A Not-So-Mighty Dong Appeared...
Unfortunately named Georgia Bulldogs quarterback Joe Cox appears in a Sporting News Today spread and it appears 1. he forgot to wear a cup, and 2. the magazine forgot to airbrush out his flaccid penis showing through his pants. (NSFW?)...
ESPN Doles Out Swift Bristol Justice Over <em>New York Post</em>'s Erin Andrews Coverage
Norby Inc. pushed the red button on some innocent New York Post reporters after the paper went a little too titsy with its Andrews cover on Monday morning....
And Here's The Front Page Of Tomorrow's <em>New York Post</em>
Amazingly, Busted Coverage's ridiculous giant penis-wielding bachelorette story was completely true. This photo tells the tale: the daring lass staring down the determined Tahoe sheriff as Michael Jordan cautiously avoids a messy inflatable dong confrontation. Yay America....
This Little Furry Will Be Shaq's Reality Show Sidekick
"Ive been alotta place but being at the shaolin temple n china has brouhht a tear to my eye buddha blessed," Shaq recently tweeted. So he cried on the shoulder of a giant panda, and turned that frown upside down....
When Is A Blog Not A Blog?
We can all agree that new media is rapidly taking down the mainstream media on almost every subject. But there's a good argument to be made that sports is the one slice of the media pie that's surviving. Why?...
And Now Let's End The Day With Michael Jordan And A Giant Inflatable Penis
I hope this post does not objectify Michael Jordan. The man can't help it if he's sexy. He just saunters his fine-ass around the golf course and people have normal, healthy reactions in his presence. Some people just go overboard....
Mutton Wins Again
Is there a bigger mismatch out there than little children vs. surly mutton? Seriously. They're like the Washington Generals on sheepback. Look, kids. Hang it up. You just aren't going to ride that mutton....
Metaphor As Illness: Whitlock, Train Rides And The Pursuit Of "Strange Tang"
Since the deaths of Steve McNair and Arturo Gatti, the world has turned its misty eyes to the prose of Jason Whitlock, who has made sense of it all by analogizing crazily and discoursing on "strange tang" and "young tail."...
Fox's Marketing Ploy May Have Been More Evil Than Previously Thought
It's bad enough that stupid Yuppie Gollum was nothing but a promotional stunt, but this is so much worse: A reader reports that Yuppie Gollum wasn't even at the All-Star Game. I'll let that sink in....
Oddsmakers Like Obama's Chances Of Not Humiliating Himself Tonight
Bodog is taking prop bets on whether the president will bounce his first pitch at the All-Star Game and thus send his country spiraling into a Depression or something. At present, the moneyline's liking Obama's arm:...
And Here's The Place Where Home Run Derbies (And DUAN!) Go To Die....And Other Things Of Note
Sportsnation really wants you to watch their show. Yeah, you in the undershirt eating the bowl of Fruity Pebbles commenting here. They won't stop posting cryptic names on their message board unless you watch....
Zambrano Pitches, Hits, Uses Inverted Pyramid
The Cubs have to be one of the most disappointing teams in the National League. It was nice for Carlos Zambrano to do, well, everything in the game today....
UFC 100 Will Be The Biggest Event Ever!!!
I'm not an MMA guy. I haven't ordered anything on pay-per-view since Wrestlemania VI. But even I know that tonight is something special....
Farewell, Judgmental Strangers
Well Deadspin, it's been a productive day. Sunrise, sunset, the earth turns, people fall in love, a tree falls on a hipster. Does it seem like I'm stalling? Because I am. I really have nothing more to say....
Somebody At ESPN Is Feeling Frisky And A Very Special Guest Editor Announcement
I haven't seen the Sportsnation show on ESPN yet, since I spend most of my day at the Gawker office, where television (along with sunlight, smiling, and sustained eye contact) are strictly forbidden, but this little shout-out is flattering....