ea Page 1930 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bernard Hopkins Wins, Loses And Draws In The Same Night
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Bernard Hopkins Hopes You'll Watch Him Try To Beat A Kid Up Tonight
Bernard Hopkins fights some guy named Jean in Quebec tonight. "Some guy" means "WBC light-heavyweight champ Jean Pascal." Showtime coverage starts at 10 p.m....

Danny Woodhead Doesn't Know Danny Woodhead Personally But Thinks "He's A Likable Guy"
Setting aside my disdain of corporate gimmicks for a moment — like, say, the sickening PR blood-orgy called "Undercover Boss" — this sporting-goods store/sneaker-company mashup that puts Patriots RB Danny Woodhead to work hawking his jersey is rather-OK fare....

New York Ranger Gets Orange Gatorade Facial
In today's Flyers/Rangers game, call-up center Dale Weise had a goal waved off due to his "distinct kicking motion" to score it. Then, he tried to get some refreshment. (H/T The 700 Level) ...

Your College Basketball Open Thread
Sixth-ranked Kansas State tips off against No. 24 Florida at 3:30 p.m. Gonzaga throws with No. 9 Baylor an hour later....

Did New York Giant Jonathan Goff Break Curfew Last Night? (Updated W/ Curfew Rule Assertion)
To hear tipster "The Michael Vick Project" tell it, these here photos are of Jonathan Goff of the New York Giants breaking team rules at McSwiggans Pub in Hoboken, NJ....

Lenny Dykstra Won't Dispense Stock Tips And Autograph Balls For $35 At A Mall Today After All
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Prepare For The Next Big Deadspin Shitstorm
Monday morning, Dec. 20, will mark the beginning of some not-so-relaxing days for a handful of current and former professional athletes, college coaches, and, of course, ESPN employees. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: dying time's here....

John Salley Story Corner: Jacking It Won't Help Your Prostate
Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: a therapeutic digression on the benefits of intercourse....

Heat Strokes, Game 27: Heat-Knicks, The Best Kind Of Rancor
FreeDarko's Bethlehem Shoals, a regular contributor to NBA FanHouse and co-author of The Undisputed Guide to Pro Basketball History (visit the FreeDarko store, too!), is keeping a game-by-game diary of the Heat's season — the one you're pretending not to care about....

Cockblocked By A Ferret!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Send Us Your Holiday Party Horror Stories
For someone who has spent such a large portion of his life drinking and vomiting, I have a shocking deficit of embarrassing holiday party stories. That's where you come in....

Gary Neal Will Look Nice On The Bottom Half Of This Poster
J.R. Smith get both air and distance, demolishing Neal with both hands. A bit of revenge - the Spurs later drew a charge to negate the potential gamewinner, but fundamental D doesn't sell sneakers....

Telestrator Dong Breaks Out On The Odd-Dong Rush
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

The Worst News Lede You'll Read All Year (UPDATE)
"For the past month, body parts have been piling up around Miami-Dade and Broward counties like extra pounds on Kim Kardashian come Christmas time." [Miami New-Times, Google cache Screengrab below]...

You'll Never Guess Which White Patriots Player Has The Best Selling Jersey
I know we keep harping on this. But Hub fans keep doing stuff like running out and buying a guy's jersey just because he's "scrappy."...

Apocalyptic Teddy-Bear Rain Delays Hockey Game
Fans and players in Calgary were horrified as plushy death rained from the rafters. Scores were killed, maimed, and softly nuzzled to sleep....

In Case You Were Wondering What George Huguely's Absurd Defense Would Be
Huguely told police he "shook [Yeardley] Love, and her head repeatedly hit the wall." Sure sounds like it was the Adderall Love was taking that killed her, as Huguely's attorneys are going to claim....

Who Wants To See A Cockatoo Singing That Drowning Pool Song?
We consider this a public service to the five of you who haven't yet seen Lolita the cockatoo singing the WWE classic, "Bodies."...

Last Night's Winner: Bruce Boudreau Makes Rex Ryan Look Like Mr. Rogers
Don't say you weren't warned. HBO's 24/7 Penguins/Capitals premiered last night, and we were promised profanity. Either we got it, or they accidentally put Deadwood back on the air....