ea Page 2065 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Sumo Cycling: The Next Great Olympic Sport
Perhaps Lance Armstrong would secretly like his teammate Alberto Contador to be pinned down by this extremely zealous fan, so he can win an eighth race....
Marietta, Georgia Books Teen Girl Larceny Squad
CHEERLEADER! SO AND SO! WHAT'S HER FACE! THE UNDERAGE ONE! They've all been charged with stealing $149 from two little girls....
We Are Gathered Here Today To Take It To The House
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Shaq Vs. The Secret Service
Shaquille O'Neal plans to meet the owner of the world's most famous White Sox jacket by walking up to his home's gated entrance, ringing the doorbell and asking if Barack Obama would like to sit on his lap. [Bog]...
The Gospel Of Stephon Marbury
Do I believe in aliens?" Stephon Marbury asked. "I don't know, because I've never seen one. But I believe in Jesus because I saw him in the shower the other day." OK, you win. Time to tune in....
Your Weekend Throwgasm Breakdown: Ice Cream Cone Physics, Rain Delays, And Stinky Dongs
The week's ending. You need shit to do. Well, fear not. For I have compiled a list of worthy activities, media and/or ingestible chemicals to help you entertain yourself....
The One Where Everyone Talks About That Thing That Everyone's Talking About
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....
Suspected Cancer Hoaxer Found Dead
Fifteen-year-old brain cancer patient "Jonathan Jay White" turns out to have been a 24-year-old woman in Ammon, Idaho, who was found Wednesday in her car, dead of an apparent suicide....
Spend Your Day Tracking Stephon Marbury's Eclecticism
As Skeets (SKEETS!) noted: This is unreal. [UStream]...
Even Babies Know The Mets Deserve To Get Puked On
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
Former ML'er A Texas-Sized Deadbeat Dad
Troy Neel, who bought an island in fricking Vanuatu to avoid paying his state-record $700,000 in child support, was sentenced today. That's twice as much as he earned in his three years in MLB. [San Antonio Express-News]...
Bingo The Bumbling Bee Bashes His Bee Balls
That's life for the Double-A Mets. First the VP of player development goes Fight Club on them. Now their tinpot mascot crotches itself during a failed home run celebration....
Jay Mariotti On Erin Andrews, AutoSummarized
"Why was the Internet ... giving semi-lives to people with no lives?" thunders Mariotti, who writes for the Internet. The column goes on in this vein for 1,500 words. Let's send this through Microsoft Word's AutoSummarize function, shall we?...
Was Lance Armstrong Duped By A Cancer Fake?
Jonathan Jay White is a 15-year-old with brain cancer whose devotion to the Livestrong credo caught the attention of Lance Armstrong and several generous donors. The grifter who invented "Jonathan Jay White" will soon catch the attention of federal authorities....
Seriously, Guys
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...
This Looks Like A Job For Rusty Kuntz
Padres' AAA affiliate looking to move. Is the world ready for the Beaverton Beavers? [Oregonian]...
CFL Lineman Sacks Purse Snatcher On Streets Of Edmonton
Because we all need to believe in the power of sport again, here's a story involving an athlete that has a happy ending. If reading about a thief get crunched by a professional football player makes you happy, that is....
Christine Brennan Offers Underminey Advice To Erin Andrews
Says the USA Today columnist: "I also would suggest to her ... that she rely on her talent and brains and not succumb to the lowest common denominator in sports media by playing to the frat house." [Big Lead]...
TMZ Purchases LeBron Dunk Tape Before We Do
Yes. Purchased it. Because despite Nike's best efforts to keep this thing under wraps, another amateur videographer smart enough to not hand it over has been shopping it for weeks when it became apparent the world wanted to Witness....
GET HAMMERED! Tad Kubler Of The Hold Steady On The Deadcast
This week's Deadcast guest is Hold Steady guitarist Tad Kubler (Listen here, iTunes here.) DOUBLE WHISKY COKE NO ICE....