f Page 3554 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Ethan Albright, Finally Vindicated
Remember Ethan Albright? The Redskins long snapper who had the worst rating in all of Madden 2007 and was immortalized in The Phat Phree's famous mock letter to John Madden? Well, his rating won't be so low next year: He's going to the Pro Bowl....

Saying Goodbye To Mike Alstott
It might come as a surprise to some of you that Buccaneers "fullback" Mike Alstott has retired. The surprise, of course, is that he didn't retire years ago; we hadn't noticed him the last couple of years either....

The Official Deadspin Super Bowl Party In Scottsdale
Monday afternoon, we'll be heading to Phoenix/Tempe/Glendale/whatever for our trip to Super Bowl XLII. We're going to be writing two columns a day, plus doing the site, all on West Coast time. So forgive the oncoming cavalcade of spelling mistakes. But the day the site will really suffer will be the...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as video surfaces of Richard Seymour doing his Zidane impression ... • College basketball: Duke at Virginia Tech (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN]; Seton Hall at Providence (7 p.m., ET); Michigan State at Northwestern (9 p.m., ET) [ESPN2]; UCLA at Oregon (10:30 p.m., ET) [FSN]. Is there any team or ...

That Six Flags Venture Hasn't Worked Out Too Well For Danny Snyder And Mark Shapiro
When Redskins owner Daniel Snyder bought the Six Flags franchise back in 2005, he said he trusted former ESPN executive vice president of programming Mark Shapiro to help turn the amusement park franchise into the next Disneyland. It, uh, hasn't quite worked out that way....

They Sure Do Follow Orders In Toronto
The National Post points out — starting at around the 4:45 mark of this video — that team president Richard Peddie is mouthing the exact words being said by new interim GM Cliff Fletcher while he says them. That's how you make sure you don't stray from the company line; that interim tag won't exist ...

We Proudly Present "A Clockwork Leather"
You may remember back in June, when we underwent our watch-ESPN-for-24-hours experiment for the book. Well, now that the book is out, the mad geniuses at Zubaz Pants have put together a visual interpretation of that chapter of the book....

Tony Romo Thinks He Can Do Better
Good news, fellows ... Jessica Simpson may soon be available. So for Heaven's sake start wearing collared shirts! (Preferably popped.) Word is that Tony Romo would like to dump her ... only she's not going easily. Hmm. Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction comes to mind here for some reason....

The Super Bowl Bye Week Jamboroo, In Which Drew Pauses To Make A Serious Point About Blogging As Journalism, Then Makes Chili
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon. Even when there are no games....

If Only Fox News Also Employed This Premise
The man seated on the right here is Tinker "Ty" Keck, former defensive back for the University of Cincinnati and the XFL Los Angeles Xtreme. He was the first contestant on the new game show The Moment of Truth, which debuted last night. It's an idea that somehow eluded George Mitchell but not the ex...

An Athlete Magazine Goes Bankrupt. Really.
Overtime Magazine is a monthly — kind of — magazine devoted to "helping professional athletes manage their money." You know what that means: They're broke!...

Is Eli Manning Today's Joe Namath? Lord, We Hope Not
If it's true that every generation gets the hero they deserve ... woe to us, America, because there's a very real possibility that Eli Manning could be today's Joe Namath. That's a somewhat terrifying concept....

About Last Night
What Dee Mirich missed while furiously writing about 200 angry poems ... • MLB: Barry Bonds asks judge to dismiss perjury charges on the grounds that he didn't understand the questions (laugh track). • College basketball: Five overtimes? Is that all? I once saw Sister Hazel do eight encores. Baylor ...

Our Field Trip To Madison Square Garden
For the third consecutive year, in the tradition of batting against John Rocker and playing touch football with Andre Rison and Kordell Stewart, we accepted an invitation from the fine folks at "Pros Vs. Joes" to — get ready — play two-on-two hoops against Charles Oakley and Charles Smith. At Madi...

Carlos Mencia Is The NFL's Dane Cook
We have made no secret of our enduring love of The Dugout, both in its original incarnation and its current, non-expletive form at AOL Sports. But you think these guys just know baseball? Pshaw....

For Those Who Can't Handle The Sheer Intensity Of Cards On TV
There was this couple-of-month stretch when poker on TV was actually sort of cool, right before the world discovered the ancient game of Bejeweled. But now poker needs a renaissance. It needs a voice. It needs — you guessed it — radio coverage....

Clearly, The First Cubs' Japanese Player
Because we're hankering for baseball already and need something to get our dander up, here's the new marketing campaign the Cubs have put together for Kosuke Fukudome. Looks great, right? Well ... that image is a rather offensive one for millions of people....

Your Prayers For More Carlos Mencia Have Been Answered
When someone convinces Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas to reprise their Bob and Doug MacKenzie characters for a beer ad, that's when I'll get excited about a Super Bowl commercial. Until then we've got Carlos Mencia, who will be featured in a Bud Light Super Bowl spot this year. Hey, where's everybody ...

Dramatic New Footage Surfaces Of Tom Brady Walking
Tom Brady WILL be at the dance tonight, girls. He WILL be there. I'm paraphrasing Bill Murray in Meatballs, but you get the picture. So, Brady's "high ankle sprain" is not as serious as many believed (hoped?) ... unless they're now making walking casts in pointy-toed dress shoe designs. He showed up...

It's Got To Be The Shoes, Money
We are sad to say that Jonah Keri has discontinued his College Basketball Closer; we will miss him. But that's not all for the Closer; we'd like to hand the mic to the gang at Storming The Floor to fill in....