f Page 3632 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dan Shaughnessy Needs Your Help!
A couple of months ago, everybody's favorite Curly Haired Boyfriend — credit to Simmons: No nasty emails please, Bill! — Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy release a memoir about his son's senior year of high school baseball. Whatever your thoughts on this — and we suspect you have some — the bo...

Dane Cook Is The Face Of Postseason Baseball
If you're Major League Baseball, you have a veritable cornucopia of options of whom you should choose to serve as your postseason spokesperson. You could use Tommy Lasorda, like last year, though there's always the dangerous possibility he could ask Joe Buck to show off his swirly move. You could us...

Happy Birthday, Wiffleball!
It's a big day in the world of sports birthdays: The wiffleball (and bat, we presume, unless they were just playing catch) turns 54 years old today. We would compare the wiffleball's age to our mother's, but she'd get all mad at us....


Time Once Again To Run Alongside Confused Beef
If you don't count the stuff that goes on in Michael Vick's backyard, then the annual Running of the Bulls in Spain is probably my least favorite sporting event. My favorite sporting event? Well, I think that's been well documented. High five! But I have to admit that every year at this time, I root...

Five Straight Wimbledons For A Swiss Athlete
When I first heard of Roger Federer, he already had two Grand Slam titles, and I was sort of hoping that with every additional championship he won, he would legally add another "-er" suffix to his last name. At this point in history he would have added 11 consecutive "ers", as he defeated Rafael Nad...

Felix Hernandez Informed By Internet That He Has Other Pitches Besides Fastball
All right, I initially highlighted the mischievousness of sports blogs to preface you all with some of the goodness sportsbloggery can achieve in life. The blog U.S.S. Mariner wrote an open letter to Seattle Mariners pitching coach Rafael Chavez, wherein he mentions how Felix Hernandez throws way to...

When Fabricated Quotes Are Taken Out Of Context
Yesterday, I mentioned in the Blogdome about how a sports talk radio show made a crucial mistake none of us seasoned sports blog readers ever do: take an Every Day Should Be Saturday post seriously. Continuing this trend, Sports Illustrated appeared to have taken a satirical riff on the NBA Draft di...

Police Find Maasive Collection Of Drugs (And One Gun)
I bet you're wondering why one person, namely former NFL player and current Fox Sports commentator Bill Maas, needs both a gun and illegal drugs and his car. You'd think one or the other would suffice for a former lineman, but it's quite simple, actually. See, the guns fend off anyone trying to take...

About Last Night ...
• NASCAR: Jamie McMurray takes Pepsi 400 checkered flag by a bottleneck. • MLB: Rangers become hoist by the O's Bedard. Horsefly sex down 300%. • Horse Racing: Panty Raid wins Grade 1 American Oaks, several Tri-Lambdas seen with winning tickets....

A Bug's Life, If That Bug Is Named John Holmes
The world has long pined for the answer to life's perpetual mystery: Is a Rangers-Orioles game more boring than watching flies screw? Well, an astute reader and his friend attended such a baseball game last night, and saw two horseflies gettin' down and procreating. Judging by these two fans' fixat...

Not Tonight, Baby, I Want To Hit The Green In Regulation
From the Department of News I Could Have Used Months Ago, a recent survey conducted by Lexus says that four out of 10 golfers in the U.S. would give up sex for a month if it meant they would achieve the perfect golf swing. Why a car company is asking these kind of questions, I'm not sure....

Greg Oden Can Only Improve On His Foul Trouble From Here
I knew there was an underlying reason notable tall dude Greg Oden went to the NBA after one year in college. It couldn't have been just the money, or the chance to be picked No. 1 overall. No, It had to be for the NBA rule that you foul out after six, not five like in college. Or maybe it was the al...

About Last Night ...
• MLB: Cleveland pitched fairly well against Toronto. Except for that one inning. • U-20 Soccer: Never did a Brazilian think USA's kids could beat Brazil's kids, let alone be schooled by a teenager named "Jozy." • Wimbledon: Bartoli upsets Henin. It doesn't say how, so I'll assume she stole her husb...


What Will Be Cut From This Year's ESPY Awards?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Jason Witten's Forging Momma
So, just to bring you back up to speed, in the world of outstanding sports moms, we have:...

The Orem Owlz Medium Is The Message
For years, we have watched the totalitarian media/mind control tactics of the rookie-level Pioneer League team the Orem Owlz with a wary eye. They have sat there, in their megalomaniacal castle in Utah, acting as if they are the rulers of all the survey, wielding their power indiscriminately and wit...

The Brewers Meet The Furries
When the Milwaukee Brewers played in Pittsburgh this week, they ended up staying at the same hotel as a Furry Convention. (It's actually the Furry Convention.) That's Bob Uecker and one of them above. The notion of the Milwaukee Brewers hanging out in the same hotel as Furries might seem funny to ...

We Doubt Anna Benson Would Have Stood For This
To wrap up today, here's yet another example of just how weird professional athletes are, from a few days ago: They sometimes live in a batting cage. That's what the Angels' Reggie Willits does, anyway....