f Page 3637 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

An Unspectacular Arsenal
Bad news for Arsenal fans ... in fact, bad news for all Premiership fans. Thierry Henry is taking his nifty feet and moving to Barcelona. With the move, Arsenal now seems like just another team while Barcelona inspires thoughts of, "Holy Christ, look at that line-up."...

Way Less Charming Than Harold And Maude
There's a lot of track and field on TV today, but it's the boring kind. It's the kind where the female athletes are older than 16, and they aren't married to their 40-year-old track coaches. But don't worry, we've got that covered, too....

Pacman Jones Murders Pacman Jones' Dreadlocks
It always seems like the hair is the first casualty in the cleansing of one's image. Pacman Jones, seen there to your right, has not only washed the stripper glitter off of his face, but he's shorn his traditional dreadlocks. His agent says he was going for a more clean-cut, less dangerous image ......

For Your Saturday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure...
1:00, NFL Europa Football. World Bowl XV. 2:00, ESPN2. LPGA Golf. Wegmen's LPGA, Third Round. 2:00, NBC. Track and Field. AT&T U.S. Outdoor Championships. 3:00, ESPNU. High School Football. Belle Glades Central (Fla.) vs. Byrnes (S.C.) 3:00, NBC. World Series of Golf. 3:00, CBS. PGA Golf. Travelers ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you rake the living room ... • NHL: NHL draft, day 1, at Columbus, Ohio. We're in front of the TV until Monday. [Versus] • Motor sports: NASCAR Nextel Cup, Toyota/Save Mart 350, practice and pole qualifying, at Sonoma, Calif. We can never find a good parking place at these things. [...

Grumbling About ESPN
• Joe Theismann is not happy with ESPN ... [Metro Boston] • ... but this guy is REALLY not happy. [The Big Lead] • This punter be badass. [WBRS Sports Blog] • Bud Harrelson is grouchy. [One More Dying Quail] • Making it rain keeps going mainstream. [College Gameballs]...

Floating Through Space With Joe Morgan
We're not sure what the rights rules are for Major League Baseball audio and video broadcasts in outer space are, but if Bud Selig hasn't figured out a way to maximize revenue on the moon, he will. Even astronauts are listening to games now. Meet Michael Lopez-Alegria....

Humanity Prepares For The Terrible Reign Of Mr. And Mrs. Bubbles
What's coming up in the world of minor league baseball ... we proudly give you Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...

In England, Nobody Scalps Tickets
So let's say you're a season ticket holder for the Miami Dolphins. One of your eight games this year is the October 28 game against the New York Giants in London. You think it's unlikely you'll be able to make the trip to London, but that's OK: With StubHub, you can sell that puppy and probably pay ...

Another Reason To Have Him On Your Fantasy Team
The man here is Patriots running back Lawrence Maroney, and Kissing Suzy Kolber has discovered that his Facebook page is not to be underestimated....

Your Importance Is Minimal, Child
We don't mean to imply that Jeff Gordon's newborn child — Ella Sofia Gordon, born yesterday at 9:09 — isn't going to be the most important person in her own family, but the following paragraph appeared on his official site today. (Via the Celebrity Baby Names Blog ... now there's a blog! It's almost...

The College World Series, DIRTY
• Ah, the ole' porn names game. Love it. [extrapolater] • Brian Urlacher has had it up to here with your RULES. [Foul Balls] • One should always smoke weed before a big game. [Kentucky.com] • Nike ads in Asia. [Deuce Of Davenport] • Everyone's being traded! [The Basketball Jones]...

This Is Why That Child Was Beating Your Ass
As anyone who watches "The Colbert Report" knows, children are a national menace that plan on taking the planet from us. And, to expedite the process, they're all now taking steroids....

Golfers, Getting Huge
MJD told you a little about this weekend, and it's certainly been discussed, but damn: Tiger Woods is really freaking jacked all of a sudden. It has some wondering whether Tiger's appearance is what inspired the PGA to finally instate steroid testing, just a few days after the U.S. Open and after ye...

Enjoy Your Night Of Watching Other People Be Drafted
This young man is Kendaris Pelton, a part-time player for Mississippi State Southern Mississippi. And by part-time, we mean that he played in seven games. And he has declared for the NBA Draft....

All The Big Stars Come Out To St. Louis
Texas Tech coach Bob Knight and "Arliss" — sorry: "Arli$$" — star Robert Wuhl were guests of Cards manager Tony La Russa during last night's brutal, nasty, hideously played 14-inning Cardinals-Royals game. (The Cardinals won, but it was not something they should be proud of.)...

About Last Night
What you missed while mowing the front lawn with scissors ... • College baseball: No ants for you! Oregon State 7, UC Irvine 1. • MLB: Sammy Sosa hits No. 600, pending results of your analysis. • MLS: Just a glorified Crew ... Columbus over Kansas City 2-1, like we had to tell you....

Nice Try, Mike
• Mike Conley thinks he's name-dropped in a new hip-hop song. We're not so sure. [Bad Idea Blue Jeans] • Latrell Sprewell's lawsuit against the New York Post is thrown out of court. [Law.com] • About that Michael Barrett trade. [Rumors And Rants] • Who has the easiest college football schedule? [Ker...

Dicky Lyons Is One Dope Dude
Dicky Lyons is a wide receiver for the Kentucky Wildcats, and despite his seemingly less-than-chiseled-athlete physique, he's one of their better players. And he also seems like as amiable a doofus as you could possibly meet....
