go Page 690 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Spend The Weekend With Gourmet Spud
Yes, fans, the photo above is the mysterious Gourmet Spud of the brilliant Food Court Lunch. A helpful tipster spotted him in the canned goods aisle at a WalMart near Banff. He was buying 40 cans of Kirkland salmon....
Why Your Team Sucks: Kansas City Chefs
Some people are fans of the Kansas City Chiefs. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Kansas City Chiefs. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Byron Hout Got What He Deserved
Is LeGarrette Blount a crazy hothead who deserves to be suspended? Absolutely. But isn't part of you a little bit pleased that he wiped that fucking smirk off Byron Hout's face?...
Here's What We'll All Be Talking About Tomorrow (UPDATE)
Quick! Look at Oregon's LeGarrette Blount sucker punch the Broncos' Byron Hout and pull a semi-Artest, before they take it down....
Michael Vick Can Play In Week 3
Roger Goodell says Vick is working on "recognizing" his "life management skills" so he only has to sit out two games this year. And no more hard lemonade! [NFL.com]...
Jason Whitlock Stages His Own Private Sports Media Roast
In his latest, Whitlock uses the occasion of Erin Andrews' Oprah appearance to go all Jeffrey Ross-on-Bea Arthur on his colleagues. Reilly's column: "read by tens of hundreds of readers who find it while looking for Bill Simmons' column." Burn!...
Jeff Jagodzinski Has Not Had A Good Year
Tampa Bay has not even seen their new offense in real-time competition yet, but they have apparently seen enough to know that it stinks. They fired coordinator Jeff Jagodzinski today, just one week before Opening Day....
Why Your Team Sucks: San Diego Chargers
Some people are fans of the San Diego Chargers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the San Diego Chargers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
Smokin' Jay: Cutler Sure Does Clean Up Nicely
Judging by this month's Michigan Avenue Magazine, the new Bears quarterback wants to mount a serious challenge to Matt Ryan as the best-looking ball-slinger in the NFL. What else is he saying with these hot new looks?...
Watch As Your Childhood Gets Choked Out
Jason David Frank, best only known as the Green Power Ranger, is entering MMA. His first opponent will be the winless Lord Zedd. [MMA Weekly]...
White Sox Trade Jim Thome, Throw In The Towel
The White Sox, losers of four in a row, have fallen six games behind the division-leading Tigers. And since it's now September, there's really no point in trying anymore. Time to start shedding contracts and call it a season....
Plague Of Insects Descends Upon Scott Boras' Angel Stadium Suite
"The bees occupied his front-row seats directly behind home plate for the first two innings. They were removed with the help of a vacuum during the third inning." And then, lo, the Lord hardened the superagent's heart. [AP]...
They're Not Saying "Boo!" They're Saying "I Hope You Die In A House Fire, You Pansy"
Jay Cutler returned to Denver last night for the first time since his temper tantrum-induced trade and did moderately well for a first half. A Neckbeard-less Kyle Orton also suffered a sewing injury on his index finger. [DenverPost]...
Bleacher Seat Almost As Good As Owner's Box
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
First, The Met Open Championship. Next, The World!
Andrew Giuliani just won his first professional golf tournament. Yippy! Let's take the Post's advice: "Do you know someone who has made New York a better place? Nominate your hero for the 8th Annual New York Post Liberty Medals." [NYP]...
Watch Out For Your Tires
Who said nothing was going on this weekend? There is live golf right now, and it's on television! They might even show the parking lot, where Y.E. Woods and Tiger Yang have adjacent spots. Awkward. [Star-Ledger]...
Patrick Kane Deprives World Of Potentially Amusing Trial
The Blackhawks forward pleads guilty to disorderly conduct and is ordered to apologize the cab driver he allegedly punched. So this whole sorry mess is behind us. Dang. [Mouthpiece Sports]...
Come For The Golf, Be Overcome By The Noxious Fumes
There's a good reason that Liberty National is the most expensive golf course ever built (and the most expensive to join.) It covers up a toxic waste dump! The radioactive sludge makes night golf so much easier! [Forbes]...
What A $500,000 Country Club Membership Buys You
A look inside Liberty National Golf Club, site of this week's PGA event, where members pay a $500,000 initiation fee plus $25,000 yearly dues to eat lunch in New Jersey. Ahh, that sweet-smelling Jersey breeze! [Star-Ledger]...
Why Your Team Sucks: Chicago Bears
Some people are fans of the Chicago Bears. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Chicago Bears. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....