hum Page 59 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

SHOTY First Round: Pac Man Jones Vs. Norby!
Every single SHOTY first-round matchup has been a blowout. We are not sure this will be any different; the Deadspin Planet is of one mind these days....

The Grand Valley State Mascot Really Loves His Job
OK, I’ve checked the rulebook, and nowhere in there does it say that you can’t hump the goalpost after your team has achieved an important first down. This round goes to you, Grand Valley State mascot. But someday your reign of Div. II goal post-sexual assault will end. Mark my words. ...

SHOTY First Round: Sean Salisbury Vs. Rick Ankiel
After almost a week off, the 2007 SHOTY Tournament returns with a matchup of two very different human beings....

SHOTY First Round: Gilbert Arenas Vs. Steely McBeam
It's SHOTY frenzy this week; two in two days. You now can spend your Thanksgiving playing around with online polls. Fun!...

SHOTY First Round: Kige Ramsey Vs. Joey Chestnut
Because Thursday is, you know, Thanksgiving, we're gonna have voting both today and tomorrow. It'll put you in the mood for tryptophan....

SHOTY First Round: Brady Quinn Vs. Alex Rodriguez
The first matchup, on Tuesday, was a blowout. We suspect this one will be a little closer....

SHOTY First Round: Elijah Dukes Vs. Jeff Reed
OK, folks ... it's time for the voting to begin. Let's all give big-up to the genius that is Jim Cooke for his official SHOTY graphic. The 2007 SHOTY voting will run every Tuesday and Thursday until, well, 2008 probably. We love Kige there....

Time For 2007 SHOTY Nominations
It might seem a little early to you, but trust us, we did the math: It isn't. It's time to start taking nominations for the 2007 Sportshuman Of The Year. You should have seen this coming when the ads for Santa Claus movies started popping up....

My Urban Dictionary Says This Is Funny ...
Mr. Irrelevant, Jamie Mottram, forwarded me this gem at 8:30 am this morning. Yes, eight-thirty. Jamie Mottram was so damn excited to show me a photo of two WV Mountaineer defensive ends forming the largest dingleberry in the world that he couldn't even sleep. No wonder this guy is successful....

Is It Wrong To Do It With An Opposing Team's Fan?
To this day, our favorite ESPN commercial remains the one where the male Ohio State fan and the female Michigan fans make out with each other. There's something primal about our reaction to it; it seems grotesque, somehow, like cousins French kissing, or a dog doing it with a sheep. Sleeping with yo...

Inside The Yankee Stadium Proposal Prank
Click to view Last week, the kids at College Humor pulled off what we'd have to consider a prank of epic proportions; one guy put a fake marriage proposal on the big screen at Yankee Stadium as his friend, the object of the prank, sat agape with his girlfriend, who, amazingly, said "yes" before he ...

May Pete Rose Live Long And Die Out
Perhaps you've heard of the new book The World Without Us, Alan Weisman's blow-by-blow account of what would happen on Earth if all human beings suddenly disappeared. But if you think this book is just some environmentalist's wet dream, you're wrong. Dead wrong. People, I give you The Voluntary Huma...

If This Isn't A Sport, What Is?
What's a sport? We think competitive eating is a sport, and if you want to play around, we suppose rock paper scissors is a sport too. But how far can you push it? Claynation's Clay Travis makes the argument that counting is the new hot pseudo sport....

The Only Time We're Going To Mention The ESPYs, Promise
Honestly, if you don't have ESPY fever, we don't know what's wrong with you. People have often commended ESPN for running the ESPYs during the All-Star Break, and we agree, though for likely different reasons: We, like you, find ourselves so into sports sometimes that it's helpful to have an event t...

Sometimes, Minor League Teams Try Too Hard
I'm not sure it makes me any more anxious to get out and see the Greenville Drive, but ... it is, unquestionably, the best Black Eyes Peas parody video I've seen by a minor league baseball team this year. In fact, it's right up there with Alanis Morissette and Will Ferrell....

Remembering what Jackie Robinson meant, and who he was
As we prepare for Jackie Robinson Day in baseball on Sunday — the Cardinals, among other teams, are considering having every player wear No. 42, which gives us the unique opportunity of seeing David Eckstein and Brad Thompson pay tribute to Jackie — we thought we would provide our own tribute to a g...

Cultural Oddsmaker: What will the Beijing Olympic Committee Suggest Banning Next?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Your SHOTY Winner: Barbaro
All right, well, after nearly two months of voting, we finally have a winner of the 2006 Sportshuman Of The Year tournament ... and, alas, it is not a human....