ick Page 630 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

At This Point, Vick Probably Owes YOU Money
You know, it's just not a Wednesday afternoon if someone isn't trying to get more money out of Michael Vick. Next up? His restaurant!...

Time Traveler Beams In For Patriots-Cowboys Presser
Absolutely bizarre question-and-answer session at the end of the Patriots-Cowboys game last night: Apparently, it's not so difficult to get a press pass in Dallas....

Newport News Teenagers Must Now Find A New Role Model
Virginia Tech has been consistent about defending their former star quarterback Ron Mexico since that whole dogfighting business, but his high school, well, they're not so proud anymore....

Jamboroo, Week 6: John Skipper's Latest Leaked ESPN NFL Coverage Memo
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

Man, Tough Break For That Vick Guy
Yes, yes, we know that Ron Mexico tortured and electrocuted puppies, we know that he's probably not the best person and we know he's gonna spend some serious time in prison. He pretty much deserves whatever's coming to him. But ... we dunno .... is it really fair that the Falcons can now recoup $19....

Hopefully, Tech Won't Be Put On "Probation"
It was only a matter of time, really, until the adjective verb "to Vick" became an acceptable taunt between rival college football fans....

Jamboroo, Week 5: I Wanna Talk Like A Motherf—kin' Quarterback
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

There's More Isiah Fun Left To Come
Awesome story in the New York Times this morning, detailing the trip Isiah Thomas took yesterday from the courthouse steps after being found guilty of sexual harassment (which won't cost him a dime) to training camp in Charleston, S.C. Oh yeah: Isiah still has a team to coach! We had almost forgotte...

Mark Cuban's Happy Feet Survive
Big congratulations to Mark Cuban: He survived another week on "Dancing With The Stars!"...

Last Chance For The Dancing Cuban
Tonight, we will find out if Mark Cuban's blistering turn on the "carpet" of "Dancing With The Stars" last night will allow him to gallivant another week. Our fingers are crossed....

Pitching Coach Fails In Escape From Tropicana Field
This man is Jim Hickey, the pitching coach for the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. As you'd expect, life as the pitching coach of the Devil Rays — sorry: Tampa Bay Rays — is not easy. It's enough to drive a man to drink....

The Bitches Get Isiah Again
Isiah Thomas, just can't catch a break, you know? It's now official: The jury has found against Isiah and the Knicks in the sexual harassment suit....

Looks Like Isiah's Season Is Starting With A Loss
The jury in the Anucha Browne Sanders vs. Isiah Thomas and the Knicks' case hasn't delivered an official verdict yet, but it looks bad for the Knicks: Very bad....


Why Would You Bet On Kids? I'm A Man! I'm 40! Bet On Me!
Unsilent Majority isn't here this weekend to help you bet on college football. Actually, to tell you the truth, I'm not here to help you either. But if the following college football bets turn out to be true, consider it dumb luck....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as police try to unravel the baffling case of The Unknown Streaker ... • MLB: San Diego at Milwaukee. This one can pretty much decide two races, right? [ESPN] • College football: West Virginia at South Florida. Go, WFV! [ESPN2] • Golf: PGA Tour, Viking Classic, second round, Madison, M...

Ookie Is No Dummy
Ladies and gentlepeople, we have finally figured out what we will do if we are ever convicted of a felony, other than "try to grow a mustache and move to Turks and Caicos." We're gonna make sure we smoke as much weed as possible, and then get caught....