ick Page 629 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Important College Football Picks
College football! Do you root for the school you attended? Or are you just some asshole who likes to root for some team you have nothing to do with? I don't follow it because I hate indentured servitude and polls....

Book From Hell
So, by the looks of it, Rick Reilly®'s new book promises to be a thoroughly dignified affair that won't in any way represent another sad step in a once-great sportswriter's descent into self-parody and studied wackiness. That much is evident....

Getting Free Shoes Does Not Make You A Celebrity Endorser
Nike has been forced to admit publicly that they have not signed Michael Vick to a new endorsement deal, after one of his agents said they had. (They're simply supplying him with gear.) Gee, that's awkward. [USAToday]...

HGH Is P.O.'ed At T.O.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Contextual Advertising Knows Rick Reilly®'s Mind
Skip the column — Reilly reviews Chad Ochocinco's new book, dad jokes ensue — and go straight to the sponsored links at the bottom. You have chosen your advertising vehicle wisely, www.consumertipsweekly.net. [ESPN]...

Dirk Nowitzki's Boys Are Now Swimming At A Doggy-Paddle Pace
Dirk vows choose a better receptacle in the future: "My sperm is getting slower,'' he said, grinning. "(So) eventually, I've got to trust somebody.''[DallasBasketball]...

Angels Get Nick Adenhart's Jersey Drunk
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Never One To Seek The Spotlight, Danica Turns Down NASCAR
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Wait, Someone Sort Of Likes Phil Mushnick?
Mediaite's Katie Baker gives what-for to Mushnick, the New York Post's sports media critic and insufferable morality pimp, but she also admits to giggling at his "meow-y media criticism." [Mediaite]...

Rex Ryan's Voicemail Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like New York Jets coach Rex Ryan, who won this weekend with one well-placed phone call. No, it wasn't to Batman....

The BAC Of The Entire Adelman Family Is About 7.4
This is...impressive. Daughter of Rockets' head coach Rick Adelman, Kathryn Naro, a high school women's head basketball coach was pinched for her second DUI earlier this week, bringing the total number of Adelman children busted for DUIs to three....

Cowboys Could Set Attendance Record, Still Get Blacked Out
The Cowboys have sold over 20,000 standing-room tickets for their official stadium opener Sunday and have a shot to break the NFL attendance record....if only they can can convince a few people to buy actual seats....

The Exception That Proves Exactly Nothing
One of our favorite gambits here at FJM is the old "use the exception that proves the rule to yell at someone for not thinking the exception is the rule" gambit....

Derrick Mason's Response To Keyshawn's Raven-Bashing: "You're The Bum!" (UPDATE)
Gifted trash talkers as they are, Keyshawn Johnson and Cris Carter's insults do not always prove true. After shitting all over Baltimore's offense by calling Joe Flacco "a bum," the Ravens exploded Sunday and fired back at the analysts....

Does Miguel Cabrera Need a Valtrex Prescription?
Wow, that's a grody canker, isn't it? Anyway, Michigan and Notre Dame are still battling it out and USC and Ohio State comes later, so consider this your open thread. And oh, I have a fun story for y'all!...

Join The 2010 Deadspin NFL Pants Party Pool, Peephole Patrons!
Hey, you! Wanna test your prognosticating knowledge again the best of the best? Yes? THEN FUCK YOU. This is the DeadspinPants Party pool. No smartypants allowed....

Rick Reilly®'s <i>SportsCenter</i> Audition Tape
No, you weren't having a nightmare. Rick Reilly co-hosted the late L.A. SportsCenter last night and it was everything you could have hoped for and more. (You were hoping for stilted camera presence and lame fatherly jokes, right?)...

Does Brooklyn Decker Really Need To Be A T&A Machine?
I am not much of a prude, and neither I guess is Andy Roddick, as he enjoys his wife exhibited to the max in glossy mags....

Mark Whicker Has Left The Yard Before
The year was 1991. Journalist and ex-Marine Terry Anderson had just been freed after nearly seven years of captivity in Lebanon. Seven years is a long time. Luckily, a columnist named Mark Whicker was around to put it in perspective....