joe Page 161 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Joe Torre, Masochist
One of our favorite games as a kid — and still, actually — was "Rock And A Hard Place." You remember the game: It involved making someone choose between two equally undesirable options. Would you rather kiss a donkey on the butt or look at a naked picture of your mom? You know, that sort of thing....

In Defense Of Joe Pa's Views Of Lesbians
(Honestly, we love that we get to write headlines like that.)...

Does Joe Pa Hate Lesbians Too?
Yesterday, we made a glib remark about Joe Paterno and Penn State's homophobic coach, because hey, we're a blog, we're glib, it's what we do. We joked that you could say what you want about Joe Paterno, but at least unlike his women's basketball coach, he didn't hate lesbians....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Penn State QB Michael Robinson: Isn't it kind of odd having a coach who conducts practice from a Rascal scooter? • 1 p.m. Football with Mel Kiper: Just saw on Court TV that your hair has filed for emancipation. Your thoughts? • 4...

Pick Your Most Hated Announcer
The finals of the great Road From Bristol bracket (non-ESPN edition) has arrived, just in time for FOX's coverage of the two championship series. The final two competitors are both baseball broadcasters, one known for being an unabashed homer, the other bringing more ballast than a war corresponde...

Tom Brady The Next Namath In More Ways Than One
We were pleased to see that Patriots quarterhunk Tom Brady shook off his hangover enough to lead the Pats to a last-minute victory over the Steelers last week; we were beginning to become somewhat concerned about his tendency to get all bombed and start hitting on Olsen twins....

Just To Freak You The Hell Out
So, we have to say, if you're trying to get people talking about your alternative weekly, it's difficult to come up with much better than putting this picture on the front page. The Boston Weekly Dig is messing with a lot of Boston frat guy's minds — and New York construction guys — and that's jus...

The Minimum Wage Of The Newark Bears
We've had a grand time this morning flipping through the newest issue of New York magazine and its Salary Issue. Essentially, it looks at all different fields and examines how salaries compare to each other, and sports is one of its most entertaining entires. We have our doubts about a few of the ...

NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 10 a.m. MLB With Joe Morgan: Hey, so, in your all your years of playing baseball, did you learn anything that you'd feel comfortable sharing with the casual fan? • 1 p.m. Page 2's Scoop Jackson: For some reason, every time we see you o...

We Hope You Like Joe Morgan
Bad news for those who are driven to murderous rage by the voice of ESPN analyst Joe Morgan: ESPN and Major League Baseball have extended their broacast agreement through 2013. Sunday Night Baseball with Morgan and Jon "Hey, Don't Look At Me, I Don't Know What The Hell He's Talking About Either" M...

Blogdome: The NCAA Can Screw Up Anything
• If there's a way to rectify a wrong by screwing over a student-athlete, rest assured that the NCAA will find it. [The Sports Frog] • Some excuses Rafael Palmeiro didn't come up with. [Zulkey] • It's bad enough that the Mets have collapsed. But do fans have to watch Jose Offerman too? Come on, that...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 10 a.m. MLB with Joe Morgan: When you said "any team that makes the playoffs can go all the way," you obviously didn't mean the A's, right? • Noon. MLB with Jerry Crasnick: After writing License to Deal, how many showers did it take ...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 10 a.m. Baseball with Joe Morgan: Come on, it was really Pete Rose who bet that batboy he couldn't drink the milk, wasn't it? • 2 p.m. Boxing with Dan Rafael: OK, in retrospect it wasn't wise to hand over our car keys to Mike Tyson. Bu...

Blogdom's Best: The Last Great Hockey Blogger
· Complete rundown of NHL TV deal from the last man who cares. [Off Wing Opinion · Some offseason news on the New Jersey Nets. Wee! [Can't Stop The Bleeding] · Yankees bloggers now turning on Joe Torre. [Pinstripe Alley] · People would hate the Padres for winning the World Series. [Gaslamp Ball]...

Fun With Joe Morgan!
We're not the only Web dorks who love making fun of Joe Morgan's sporadic ESPN chats ... but that doesn't mean we don't love it the most....

Gotcha!
We have been giggling all morning at Marlins third baseman Mike Lowell's successful execution of the hidden-ball trick last night; it's our favorite play in sports. We're hardly alone either. The great archivists at Retrosheet has a collection of all the great hidden-ball tricks of the past. And ...

Getting Drunk With Joe Theismann
More on new ESPN Monday Night Football analyst Joe Theisman. Last year, a nice blogger man named Paul Katcher came up with the Sunday Night Football drinking game. Highlights:...

It's Slap Joe Theismann Day!
Yesterday, ESPN announced that its "Monday Night Football" team for 2006 will have Al Michaels and Joe Theismann in the booth. Michaels was a given, but the analyst job was up in the air. And it would be fair to say that Theismann who has a tendency to do to football analysis what Lawrence Taylor ...

More Fun With Joe Morgan
Internet baseball fans never tired of making fun of ESPN baseball analyst Joe Morgan, and the crazy kids at Large Regular are no different. They offer up a mock conversation with Morgan about the release of the new Harry Potter book, clearly playing around with his noted "I haven't read Moneyball"...