lifes-rich-pageant Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Guy Loses Fantasy League, Has To Make Embarrassing Photo Calendar
This is a pretty great way to punish the person who comes in last in your fantasy league. Instead of merely living with shame in the abstract, make it tangible (and practical!) with a calendar full of embarrassing photoshops, like naked Prince Fielder....
West Ham Idiot Runs Length Of Pitch, Takes Free Kick For Spurs
An Idiot On The Field invaded the pitch at Upton Park today, and made the most of his time in the spotlight: he took a crucial free kick for the visiting Tottenham Hotspur....
Just A Few Baseball Fans Dressed As Peapods, Chatting
"I dunno, I feel like I don't read anymore, you know? Have you read any good books recently? Nothing interests me. New fiction, classics, non-fiction, none of it. My kid tried to get me to read Lord Of The Rings and I was like, "I already read Jordan's autobiography."...
Angry Driver Versus Cyclists Makes For Great Roadside Screaming Match
Drivers and cyclists getting into confrontations is a thing that happens so often that it's hardly ever worth pointing out, but this is a special circumstance....
Hot Mic Catches Jon Jones And Daniel Cormier Talking Incredible Shit
"Hey pussy, are you still there?" ...
Which NBA Player Farted And Put His Dick On This MTV Lady?
This is Carly Aquilino, a comedian and cast member on MTV's Girl Code, doing a spot on the Brilliant Idiots podcast, hosted by Charlamagne Tha God (who tells great stories) and Andrew Schulz. Aquilino's story is about the time she hung out with an NBA player who farted very loudly and then put his p...
Do Not Challenge This Lady To A Game Of Musical Chairs
Here we have a friendly bout of mid-rodeo musical chairs wherein some poor sap gets hit harder than Mike Tyson ever hit anybody, harder than Napster hit the music industry, harder than Jadeveon Clowney hit whoever that was. This dude gets lit the fuck up, is what I'm saying, and per the full video...
This Is The Best Excuse For Failing A Breathalyzer Test
The Daily Mirror's Sophie Gadd called attention to this News of the Weird item, and we here at Deadspin had some thoughts about it. We discussed it in our staff chatroom....
Dude's Massive Rave Leads To Historically Great Local News Segment
This is a local news report about James Taylor, a wonderfully goatee'd, 20-year-old West Michigan man who threw a big-ass party at his house that featured multiple DJs, fire-throwers, go-go dancers, and about 2,000 attendees. It's a really funny news report, but it achieves transcendence around the ...
Adam Duritz Receives Birthday Greeting From <i>AARP The Magazine</i>
Counting Crows frontman Adam Duritz, one of the least polarizing and most objectively audio-visually soothing singers in rock 'n' roll history, is a half-century old today. This has attracted the notice of the official magazine for the American Association of Retired Persons, which is far more Twi...
Man Seeks Girls To Host Fantasy Football Draft, Possibly While Topless
The cool bro you see above is, according to this Craigslist post, looking for two girls to host his upcoming fantasy football draft. All he needs is a couple of girls to run the draft board, serve the fellas some drinks, and, you know, wear a bikini or some sexy lingerie and maybe even pop those...
Extremely Intoxicated Metro North Passenger Munches On Floor Chips [Update]
This horrible incident occurred on one of New York's Metro North trains, which are often booze-fueled nightmares, full of shit-hammered White Plains residents trying to get home at 1:45 a.m. after drinking themselves stupid in the Meatpacking District....
U.S. Rep Mistakes American Officials For Foreigners; Awkwardness Reigns
The Cable at Foreign Policy has documented the collapse of the American government. In a congressional hearing on Thursday, Rep. Curt Clawson of the 19th District of Florida, mistook two senior American officials, Nisha Biswal and Arun Kumar, for representatives from the Indian government, and repea...
Naked Burger Thieves On The Lam In Florida Beach Town
Listen. Sometimes it's 3:06 in the morning, you and a couple of your buddies are wandering around a beach town in various states of undress, and suddenly you have need of 60 hamburgers, three pounds of bacon, three red peppers, and, uh, a paddleboard. Immediately! And the grocery stores are cl...
Idiot On The Field Evades Police, Gets Gerardo Parra Selfie
It was only a matter of time before these things started becoming regular. Here's your latest Idiot On The Field to use the opportunity for selfie-taking, tonight in Phoenix. ...
Minor League Baseball Fan Tries To Fight Opposing Pitcher After HBP
It got hot in the Texas League last night as a fan of the AA Corpus Christi Hooks charged the mound to attack Midland RockHounds pitcher Blake Hassebrock in the fifth inning....
We Have Another Minnesota Twins Back-Hair Jersey
It's hard to say if it's the same guy who sported the Joe Mauer hir-suit a few years back, but we have a few clues. Our first clue is: a dude with enough hair to legibly shave words and numbers into his back hair. Our second clue is: similar male pattern baldness on both men. Our third clue is: a wi...
Yankees Fan Caught Sleeping In Stands Sues Everyone For Defamation
The man in the screencap above, taken from ESPN's April 13 broadcast of a game between the Red Sox and Yankees, is a deeply sensitive man who does not understand how the internet works. We know this because he has filed a defamation lawsuit against ESPN, John Kruk, Dan Shulman, and MLB Advanced Me...
The Reason Koreans Threw Toffees At Their Soccer Team Is Hilarious
South Korea had a mostly shit World Cup, drawing once and losing twice and looking haggard throughout. So when they arrived home this Sunday, BBC explains, "angry fans threw handfuls of sweets at them, which is considered an insult in the country." BBC does not explain that the candies look like dic...
Topless Woman Crashes News Report At Pride Festival
CityNews reporter Natalie Duddridge had one hell of a day at the office yesterday. It began with a Brazilian soccer fan bringing the "fuck her right in the pussy" fake news blooper to life, and it ended with a very happy/drunk World Pride attendee shaking her boobs right at the camera during a live ...