mo Page 768 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Chalk One Up For The Little Guy
And so the debate rages: Does Johnny Damon, or doesn't he, suck? We refuse to take sides, but one thing we can report is that our nation's babies are now involved. A New Bedford housewife, still miffed over Damon's defection to the Yankees, had been trying to sell "Johnny Damon Sucks" baby bibs on...

The Final Death Knell For ESPN Mobile
We know you don't need us to occasionally remind you just how much of a disaster ESPN Mobile has been for the Worldwide Leader ... but we thought we'd go ahead and try anyway....

Morrison-Tyson: What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
Remember Tommy Morrison? In a more sports world with a little more flair than the one we inhabit, his story would be among the most compelling. Distant relative of John Wayne, co-star with Stallone in Rocky V, briefly heavyweight champion, beat George Foreman, spent 14 months in jail and, oh yeah,...

Get Drunk With ESPN
We've been waiting for someone to come up with a definitive ESPN drinking game, and even though this might not be the definitive one, it's pretty close. Here's a fun "Pardon The Interruption" sampling:...

Only A Matter Of Time Before This Becomes An Olympic Sport, You Know
It is at once Carl Monday's worst nightmare, and everyone else's dream come true. On August 5, hundreds of people will gather in a hall in central London to, um, pleasure themselves for charity. We only wish we were kidding about the UK's first "masturbate-a-thon," in which contestants — both men ...

Gammons Out Of The Hospital
Excellent news: ESPN's Peter Gammons is out of the hospital and entering a rehabilitation center. It has been three weeks since his brain aneurysm, and his wife says he and his doctors are pleased with the progress he has been making....

The True Nature Of Bo's Tecmo Dominance
From our old friends at Kissing Suzy Kolber comes this rather classic video of showing just how great Bo Jackson was on Tecmo Bowl. It's a quarter-long touchdown run. This almost certainly happened to us repeatedly as a child....

One Final Monday-Cooper Explosion ... Be Ready
So if you're like us and you spend your weekends doing everything you can to avoid the computer, you might not know about this yet. So we feel like maybe you should sit down. Take a deep breath. You might not be ready....

A Little Mo' Zo
Alonzo Mourning has announced his intentions to return to the Miami Heat to help Jason Williams and Antoine Walker defend their NBA championship. Mourning was reportedly getting some attention and offers from other teams, including the San Antonio Spurs, but in the end, the allure of playing another...

So Much For A Colorblind Society
The Baltimore Orioles were set to have a Brian Roberts bobblehead giveaway today, but there was a bit of a snafu. 20,000 bobbleheads showed up on their doorstep, and they opened them to find that the Brian Roberts doll had much darker skin than the actul Brian Roberts....

It Just Keeps Giving
I'm afraid I gave you only part of the story with the earlier Mike Cooper post. Carl Monday has gotten himself involved again, and where there's Carl Monday, there's more story....

Mike Cooper Avoids Jail Time; Prison Showers
The sentence has come down, once again, courtesy of our man Jimbo. Mike Cooper, he of library-masturbating fame, was found guilty, and was fined $150 plus court costs. That's it. Bail was $500,000, and the fine is $150. All is well that ends well, I suppose. Who among us hasn't paid $150 for an or...

The Mike Cooper Sentencing ... You Are There!
Well, the Mike Cooper sentencing is over, and our man Jimbo was, indeed, there. We're still not sure precisely what Cooper's sentence was — Jimbo didn't make it that far into the proceedings — but he was there, and he even captured Cooper and his parents on his camera phone ... kind of....

It's Judgment Day For Mike Cooper
Today, friends, could be the final chapter in The Most Amazing Story Of Our Time: Mike Cooper himself is due to be sentenced today, at 1:30 p.m. ET, in Berea Municipal Court....

Run, You Stupid Linebacker, RUN!
Just to be clear on this, if some guy stabbed us, in a bowling alley or elsewhere, we would never stop crying. We're a bleeder. We would wail and scream and whine and plead and any other verb that connotes sniveling wimpdom....

Go Crazy, Folks
The reverberations from minor league manager Joe Mikulik's impassioned freak out last month are still being felt — and will continue to be until the beginning of September. The crafty promotions team of the Augusta (Ga.)Green Jackets is preparing for when Mikulik's Asheville (N.C.) Tourists come t...

ESPN And Its Lack Of Properly Ordered Ducks
Since a lot of you probably weren't working on Monday — like we were — you might have missed this: ESPN announced that it wants to be the MySpace of sports by hosting fan sports blogs on its site come September. Ignoring the failed MLBlogs model on this — though it kinda seems like they're just st...

Carl Monday Is Not Scared Of Your Internet
Carl Monday has been CLEVELAND'S INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER for decades, but only recently has he earned himself officially Interwebs Superstar status. (Which is probably why he was beaten on the Eddie Griffin story.) It seems that Monday is less than comfortable with his new notoriety....

ESPN Wants Your Sports Blogs
So, friends, here's a rather terrifying story from AdAge:...

The Real Story Of The World Cup
After all the talk of diving in soccer yesterday, we couldn't possibly have been happier to receive this comprehensive study from "Information Builders." The point of the study is to look at the World Cup so far — up to but not including this morning's Germany-Argentina game — and tally which teams ...