nf Page 1267 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cut The Black Wire
Last night, the Pittsburgh Steelers all gathered at a Loews theater in West Homestead, Penn., to watch on the big screen the DVD of their championship season. Apparently, an Eagles fan found out about it; the whole thing was cancelled after a phoned-in bomb scare....

The Sex Boat Story Will Never Go Away. Awesome.
Is it possible to ever get tired of the Vikings sex boat story? We think it's not. We're pretty sure, actually....

Blah Blah Labor Issues Blah Blah
Sigh. Honestly, we hate doing posts about labor woes. It's not that they're not important; they obviously are. It's just that, as fans, watching prolonged labor strife is like being in the room when everyone's talking about you like you're not there. All the issues being discussed are up for debat...

Bonds' Comedic Timing As Pitch Perfect As Ever
It's one thing for Barry Bonds to to dress up as Paula Abdul as a prank in spring training. (Or, more accurately, as a Media Event for his reality show.)...

Barry Bonds Is Ready For His Closeup, ESPN
Call us cynical, but we've been mulling over this whole Barry Bonds-in-drag thing that occurred at the Giants spring training practice field on Tuesday. Upon further review, we smell a very large and stinky rat. This, you see, was a very un-Barry-like thing to do. Whatever Barry is about, he is no...

Hide Your Eyes, Children
Your eyes are not deceiving you, unless you think that's a picture of a sane human being unworthy of ridicule, in which case, yes, your eyes are deceiving you....

Four Tiny Tidbits On: The Giants
We're just more than a month from Opening Day, so it's time to start previewing the season. Inspired by an old feature on The Black Table, we're going team-by-team and distributing Four Things You Don't Know about them. We're not sure how this is gonna work, but if you have suggested oddities on y...

If Your Wonderlic Score Is Lower Than Your Jersey Number...
...then it's unfortunate that you're wearing #10. It's being reported by profootballtalk.com that Vince Young scored a six on the Wonderlic test. That's six. S-i-x. 6....

Dan Snyder's Prayers Have Been Heard
It's looking more and more like the NFL is going to play the 2007 season without a salary cap, which is bad news if you're one of the people who have been enjoying the leaguewide parity over the last few years. We could be headed towards total chaos....

Getting Your NFL Fix
I'm watching the NFL Combine this afternoon until basketball heats up, observing the extremely intimate workouts like the one pictured above. I knew that they measured size, strength, and performance in drills, but I didn't know that they gave thorough prostate exams. I guess it's never too early...

Barry's Back, And So Are the Memories
It was 7:59 a.m. in Scottsdale Ariz., and even the lizards were holding their breath. Would Barry Bonds show up for his first spring training workout? After all, Bonds had hinted, then retracted, then hinted again that baseball was no longer fun, and that he might retire. Then — 8 a.m.! Bonds arri...

NFL Draft Prospect Dreams Big
Texas Longhorns safety Michael Huff is generally regarded as one of the top safety prospects in the upcoming NFL draft. And Huff, like many other young football players, is really looking forward to being drafted. Why? Because he wants to buy an IHOP....

Ricky Williams Appealing Hot Piss Test
Ricky Williams is reportedly appealing his most recent failed drug test, which if proven true, could end his 2006 season for the Miami Dolphins. Williams previous failed tests were for marijuana but, according to the story, the latest failure was for another illegal substance. The ruling on his ap...

Heisman Trophy Export Business Is Thriving
In my continuing quest to find even a small amount of football to inject into my life in the NFL offseason, I bring you this reader tip: Former Heisman Trophy winner Eric Crouch has found a home with the Toronto Argonauts. He joins all-time great (actually, I don't know how great they were in Toro...

The Special Edition That Wasn't There
We've always been curious about what happens to those pre-made shirts that say things like "Houston Astros 2005 World Series Champions" — it turns out this is what happens — but now we have a new question: What about those "special editions" newspapers put together weeks in advance that end up bei...

Man, Tommy Maddox Has Really Let Himself Go
You know, we understand that beards are the big thing in the NFL playoffs right now, but honestly, we had no idea this guy was a starting quarterback in the AFC Championship Game on Sunday. (He's from the World Beard Championships, in case you were wondering.)...

The Whole SYSTEM Is Out Of Order!
Oh, how nice it is to take a trip to the halcyon days of yesteryear, to revisit — again ... and again ... and again — our old friends Renee Thomas and Angela Keathley, the Carolina Panthers lesbian cheerleaders. (Honestly, it's so warm having them back in the news again, like going back and visiti...

Matt Millen's Discerning Eye For Genius
Whenever Lions general manager Matt Millen ("Fire Millen!") makes some sort of executive decision, we tend to sit up and take notice, if just so we can film it and send it into one of those blooper shows. Today's decision is the hiring ("Fire Millen!") of Buccaneers defensive line coach Rod Marine...

"Football! Go Steelers! Weeee!"
Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer has been having a grand time this week showing pictures of borderline insane sports fans and the lengths they will go to support their team; our personal favorites are the guy with all the Steelers tattoos and the Seahawks fan who calls himself "Cannonball."...

Need Tickets ... Need Tickets ...
We were complaining, oh, two posts ago, about not enough fans being appropriately ecstatic about the conference championship games this week, but in the host cities, that's anything but the case. It's time for our weekly look at the most expensive tickets on eBay (those that actually have a bid) f...