"I'm almost happy it ended the way it did because I've learned so many lessons from him. It would have been tragic if we got into fights and then divorced." [New York Post, via Gawker]

Aw, the poor girl. She just can't win.

Elin Nordegren reportedly received $110 million in her divorce settlement. That's 11 times more than No. 1 mistress Rachel Uchitel received from No. 2 golfer Tiger Woods. In a just world, it would have been 17 times more. Or 19?

PGA Championship's next week. How's Tiger doing at his warm-up event in Akron?

Then you should join the Deadspin Facebook page, which is quickly turning into the world's premiere online orgy. Look at that — more than 7,000 hot and horny people just waiting to Like your stuff. You know you want in.

This is not one of Tiger Woods's mistresses. She's just a young lass with a healthy sense of humor propping her hiney up against a painting. "Crouching lady, Tiger banging," if you will. But there's other Tiger Woods mistress news.

Rachel Uchitel, known internationally as "Tiger Woods Mistress #1," is gearing up for a new career as a correspondent for Extra. She gave a bland interview to Mario Lopez, yet spurned my own half-assed attempt at snagging one. On Facebook.

These are some of the things that are happening in the nether regions of the sports gossip world. This news is not breaking. It is not exclusive. There are no exclamation points. We did not pay for these photos.

These are some of the things that are happening in the nether regions of the sports gossip world. This news is not breaking. It is not exclusive. There are no exclamation points. We did not pay for these photos.

We produce a lot of posts every month. Most of them disappear quickly. Some of them don't. Here are the 10 most popular posts from December, ranked low to high

Meet Julie Postle, an Orlando cocktail waitress who blew off her ex for Tiger Woods. Postle revealed that she stored Woods' name in her cell phone as "Mr. Brightside," which is just gross. And is the Woods marriage a sham?

TI-ger Watch... Club-carrying Kiwi goon, Steve Williams, contends he had no idea his boss was such a cad: "I do not have any personal knowledge of anything in the reports related to the Tiger Woods' stories." High fucking five, Stevie.

Here's a story about three women and their relationships with Tiger Woods. One is a porn star you haven't met. The other two are rumored mistresses, but they're really much more important than that. Welcome to Tigerland.

Tiger Woods round-up...The not-so-secret conversations between Eldrick and Lady Uchitel reveal more absurdly sordid details about their alleged humping sessions. And — get this! — Tiger isn't the only professional golfer who enjoys a piece of Strange Tang.

A 24-hour Tiger roundup...Rachel Uchitel seemed determined to wrest the tabloid top spot back away from Tiger's other playthings, but she changed her mind about a lawyer-aided press conference due to "unforeseen circumstances." Plus, the latest in Tiger prenuptial news.

The Florida Highway Patrol has ended their investigation of the Thanksgiving Night mishap that Changed America Forever. No criminal charges will be filed. Just a small fine and a very big marital mess. So what do we know now?

Charles Pierce, the behatted nemesis of Bill Simmons, wrote a piece for Esquire.com about covering bachelor Tiger in '97 and the golfer's not-so-secret rep as "something of a hound." And Radaronline and USweekly foretell more road beef coming.

The New York Post landed an exclusive interview with Rachel Uchitel, the woman accused of having an affair with Tiger Woods, as far as angry vehement denials go this is a pretty good one.

I choose to believe this: TMZ is reporting that Tiger told a friend that his wife had "gone ghetto," and he had to "to run to Zales to get a 'Kobe Special.'" [TMZ]

Via golf blogging impresario Geoff Shackelford from Tiger's fan page, where the previously Teflon superstar said this: "I think we've avoided a lot of media attention because we're kind of boring." Boredom quelled.