rants Page 10 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

<em>Inception</em> Was Great, Now Please Stop Talking About It, Assholes
I went and saw Inception on Friday night. I like any movie that includes mid-air hand-to-hand combat and Marion Cotillard's cleavage. But it's clear this movie is about to supplant "Lost" for annoying fanboy overanalysis....

Timofey Mozgov Is Cocksucker
Today is day Timofey Mozgov becomes most unlikable person in Russian Basketball Super League, and perhaps all Russian sports. I think he is okay a year ago. No more. He is villain now....

Counterpoint: LeBron James Is Not A Cocksucker
Yesterday, a guy who spent seven seasons with the team that drafted him announced he wanted to play basketball with his friends and win a lot of games. He wanted this so badly that he was willing to take a pay cut....

LeBron James Is A Cocksucker
Tomorrow is the day LeBron James becomes the most unlikable person in the NBA, and perhaps all of American sports. I used to think he was okay a year ago. No more. He's the villain now....

Bob Costas Feeds The Strasburg Hype Machine
Stephen Strasburg was pretty amazing in his major league debut last night, but that didn't stop baseball's self-appointed dream weaver from pumping up the superhero rhetoric even further—while simultaneously blaming others for their flights of fancy....

The Epitome of Douche: "Bros Icing Bros"
I went to a wedding this weekend and saw at least three bros (BRAH!) get iced. This retarded game needs to stop immediately. Right fucking now....

Dear Philadelphia Fans: Tase Yo'selves Before You Wreck Yo'selves
It seemed a bit excessive to zap the towel-waving teenage scamp at CBP, but the black hearts of Phillies fans really could use some seizure-causing high voltage right now....

The NCAA Is Destroying The Men's Basketball Tournament
The 2010 men's championship has been one the most exciting and competitive basketball tournaments ever. I hope you enjoyed it, because it will be the last time. The NCAA is determined to ruin the best thing it ever created....

Everyone Agrees: NBC's Olympic Coverage Sucks
I was only half-serious when I lamented how the lame non-live coverage by NBC was ruining Winter Olympics. (I'm in curling heaven now!) But apparently there are others out there boiling over with tape-delayed rage....

Roy Williams Is A Clueless Dick
North Carolina head coach Roy Williams has previously demonstrated his complete lack of perspective on more than one occasion, but he still wants you to know that the Haitian earthquake was nothing compared to losing to Virginia at home....

What <i>Jimmie Johnson 24/7</i> Doesn't Teach You About NASCAR (Hint: Everything)
Here's what I learned about stock car racing last night: It requires a lot of shuttle runs, garage floors are never dirty, and the people who do it live in gigantic stainless steel kitchens (which are also never dirty.)...

Last Night's Winner: Massholes
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Curt Schilling's boy toy, Scott Brown, who posthumously kicked Ted Kennedy's health care loving butt. This is exactly like the American Revolution, but more annoying....

Patriots Workers Stopped In Immigration Sting
Gillette Stadium hired dozens of workers to shovel snow from the field, and apparently had them sent in from Guatemala, by way of Rhode Island....

Enjoy Your Imaginary Championship Game, Texas and Alabama
You can use this post as an open thread for tonight's Alabama-Texas game, which means it's the perfect place for trash talk, yelling at people on TV, or composing angry rants against the BCS. Here...let me help you with that!...

Last Decade's Winner: No One
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Unfortunately, the last 10 years were so depressing I'm not sure anyone actually came out ahead....

Maradona Tells His Critics To "Suck It", Also "Keep On Sucking it"
Argentina's greatest soccer hero has caught a lot of flack since taking over the national team and leading them almost nowhere. But after dramatically securing a last-minute World Cup berth, he let loose with an epic kiss-my-ass tirade....

Bob Arum: MMA Is Nothing But Skinheads, Homosexuals
If boxing wants to win the war against MMA, you know what it needs more of? Grumpy old white guys willing to provide insulting, homophobic, possibly racist rants about its rival audience. Take it away, Bob Arum!...

Alabama Fan Is Not Pleased About That Last Call
Not only did college football return to us last weekend, it brought back a classic genre of the YouTube age—the overstimulated SEC fan boiling over with rage as they watch their team fail on TV....

Who Needs An Immigration Wall When You Have Chipper Jones?
The Atlanta Braves third baseman is an avid hunter and since his home rests on a tract of land near the Mexican border, he often encounters many of brave illegal immigrants stealthily en route to a better way of life....

Rick Pitino Has Had It With You Lying Liars
Earlier today, police released videotapes of the interviews with Karen Sypher where she accused Rick Pitino of all that bad stuff. Well, Pitino did not like that one bit and he's got the angry press conference rant to prove it....