rants Page 7 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bill Romanowski Remains A Terrifying Human Being
NFL commentator and sex advice columnist Bill Romanowski showed the same fire that made him one of the league's scariest players to face on the field in a live TV rant about perceived weaknesses in the Oakland Raiders organization....

Screw You, And Screw Your Man Card
I don't know who invented the phrase "Turn in your man card," but whoever it is should be taken out in the street and have his balls stomped on by a fucking marching band. Every Sunday, I'm now subjected to some goddamn Miller Lite ad where the guys in it are like, "ZOMG! You're drinking a generic l...

LeBron James Is STILL A Cocksucker
If you missed last night's schaudenfreudegasm with LeBron and the Heat getting lane-raped by J.J. Barea for 48 minutes, oh how you missed out. There hasn't been a more gratifying moment for sports haters since the Saints beat Favre and Manning back-to-back in the NFC title game and Super Bowl. It w...

Why Men Send Dong Shots To People
We've all had a good laugh about Anthony Weiner using his Twitter account to show the world that white Congressmen can have surprisingly decent-sized cocks. And we here at Deadspin have gotten a great deal of mileage out of men who, in fit of passion, decided to take pictures of their dicks and send...

I’ll Wear Shorts If I Goddamn Want To
Memorial Day weekend is coming to mark the start of summer, and once again I find myself confronted with assholes all over the place telling me I can't wear shorts. First there's designer Tom Ford:...

Gregg Easterbrook Puts The Final, Retarded Exclamation Point On Obama's Bracketology-Gate
You only need to see the headline and the byline to know what you're in for with yesterday's breathtakingly pointless Easterbrook essay about President Obama filling out a March Madness bracket. Yes, some people are still actually debating this. BLACKIEHUSSEINBRACKETGATE! Let's dive in, shall we? ...

They Ruined The Goddamn Bracket
I was ready for the 68-team field to fuck with the process of filling out a bracket for your NCAA office pool. But I didn't quite realize the extent of it until yesterday, when they unveiled just how this retarded new format will work....

The Real Villains Of The NFL Lockout: A Gentle Reminder
The current collective bargaining agreement between the NFL and its players union ends at 11:59 p.m. this evening. And whether or not there's an official lockout, or the union decertifies, or whatever other bargaining tactic is deployed, the business of football effectively ends tonight regardless....

Please Take Your Trick Shot Video And Shove It Up Your Cockhole
Seriously. Unless there's someone who is brave enough to drop a baby off a high-dive through a basketball rim, Deadspin is longer interested in trick shot videos....

How Ferrari spins
The ecstasy of driving a new Ferrari is almost always eradicated by the pain of dealing with Ferrari. It's out of control; to the point it will soon be pointless believing anything you read about its cars. [Jalopnik]...

The NCAA Is Destroying The Men's Basketball Tournament
The 2010 men's championship has been one the most exciting and competitive basketball tournaments ever. I hope you enjoyed it, because it will be the last time. The NCAA is determined to ruin the best thing it ever created....

Everyone Agrees: NBC's Olympic Coverage Sucks
I was only half-serious when I lamented how the lame non-live coverage by NBC was ruining Winter Olympics. (I'm in curling heaven now!) But apparently there are others out there boiling over with tape-delayed rage....

Roy Williams Is A Clueless Dick
North Carolina head coach Roy Williams has previously demonstrated his complete lack of perspective on more than one occasion, but he still wants you to know that the Haitian earthquake was nothing compared to losing to Virginia at home....

What <i>Jimmie Johnson 24/7</i> Doesn't Teach You About NASCAR (Hint: Everything)
Here's what I learned about stock car racing last night: It requires a lot of shuttle runs, garage floors are never dirty, and the people who do it live in gigantic stainless steel kitchens (which are also never dirty.)...

Last Night's Winner: Massholes
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Curt Schilling's boy toy, Scott Brown, who posthumously kicked Ted Kennedy's health care loving butt. This is exactly like the American Revolution, but more annoying....

Enjoy Your Imaginary Championship Game, Texas and Alabama
You can use this post as an open thread for tonight's Alabama-Texas game, which means it's the perfect place for trash talk, yelling at people on TV, or composing angry rants against the BCS. Here...let me help you with that!...

Last Decade's Winner: No One
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Unfortunately, the last 10 years were so depressing I'm not sure anyone actually came out ahead....

Maradona Tells His Critics To "Suck It", Also "Keep On Sucking it"
Argentina's greatest soccer hero has caught a lot of flack since taking over the national team and leading them almost nowhere. But after dramatically securing a last-minute World Cup berth, he let loose with an epic kiss-my-ass tirade....

Bob Arum: MMA Is Nothing But Skinheads, Homosexuals
If boxing wants to win the war against MMA, you know what it needs more of? Grumpy old white guys willing to provide insulting, homophobic, possibly racist rants about its rival audience. Take it away, Bob Arum!...

Alabama Fan Is Not Pleased About That Last Call
Not only did college football return to us last weekend, it brought back a classic genre of the YouTube age—the overstimulated SEC fan boiling over with rage as they watch their team fail on TV....