si Page 981 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you decide not to vote for Chad Henne ... • Little League Baseball: World Series, pool play, at Williamsport, Pa.; Walpole, Mass. vs. Warner Robins, Ga.; Taiwan vs. Mexico, Why is Sean Hannity checking IDs? [ESPN2] • MLB: Padres at Mets. The series that could make or break Mr. Met. ...

Dunkin' Berman
I wrote for my college newspaper, and yesterday I got to flex my rarely-used reporterly muscles when I spotted this ad outside a Dunkin' Donuts by my house....

And Miss, What Does The "P" Stand For Again?
I don't know much about soccer. I'm not going to pretend to know much about soccer. But if the masses want some Prem League recaps, they are going to get some Prem League recaps. I hope it's sufficient....

Blogdome
• The guy suing Vick for $63 billion? He's also suing Bonds, Selig, and Hank Aaron's bat. [Epic Carnival] • Ryan Seacrest had a show on ESPN. Yes, you read that right. [The Sports Oasis] • What it will take to break some of baseball's records. [Life In The Cell] • The NFL's version of the Lil' Brown...

Peter King's Onion Doppleganger
It's almost NFL season, which means we're all about to experience a solid five months of Peter King. This is fine; King knows more about football than almost everyone we know. But be prepared: MMQB is about to take up residence in your brain and lay eggs....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while raking the living room ... • MLB: Cardinals, baby! Two-and-a-half games back. • MLB: Carlos Guillen scoffs at your feeble pitches. Tigers 8, Yankees 5. • Tennis: Federer eliminates Roddick ... no, Ferrer beats Roddick, and ... Ferrero loses to ... who did Federer beat? Oh, just...

If Only The Large Breasted Hot Women Would Leave Athletes Alone!
The handsome rapscallion you see right there is Will Demps, a slightly mediocre free safety for the New York Giants who's pretty much destined to be on a reality show in six years. He's a smoldering fellow, and you know what that means: He just can't keep the groupies off him....

Dice-K Has Expensive Balls (Sorry)
How much would you pay for a baseball signed by Daisuke Matsuzaka? We ask this not as theoretical. There's an actual, concrete price, and ... well, uh, it seems like a lot....

Barry Bonds Is Taking Curt Schilling Deep
We might not get our Ron Mexico trial, but there's plenty of potentially awesome litigation that could come down the pipeline. It appears that Barry Bonds might take on Curt Schilling ... in the courtroom....

How FJM Ended Up In SI
If you're one of those people left who regularly reads Sports Illustrated, you might have noticed an unusual byline in the "Scorecard" section this week: Ken Tremendous. That's a fake name, representing an anonymous blog. One of the best, actually: The great Fire Joe Morgan. How did this happen?...

The MLS Is Expanding, With Or Without Beckham
David Beckham — or "Becks," as apparently people call him, though we've never actually met one of these people — could make his MLS debut tonight, maybe, for a few minutes, depending on whether or not he's feeling up to it. But no matter what's going on with Beckham, the league itself is moving forw...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while reading the Iliad, and skipping the Odyssey ... • MLB: Cubs urge everyone not to panic; the helicopters will be here soon to evacuate the women and children. • Tennis: Nikolay Davydenko wins opener at Rogers Cup in a match that certainly was not fixed by organized crime. • WNBA...


O.J. Is Superbad
From Winning the Turnover Battle comes a very odd story. In fact, we're not entirely convinced that someone didn't dream it. If David Lynch had adapted the Berman "You're With Me, Leather" saga for the big screen, it might have gone something ... like ... this:...

Rick Reilly Gets Shirtless And Sweaty For His Art
Who's that handsome shirtless man sweating like Aaron Altman? Why, that's Sports Illustrated columnist Rick Reilly, who, in another of his wacky journalistic stunts, entered the World Sauna Championships in Finland this weekend....


Even Crazy Terrorist Bastards Take Time Out For Sports
"Bin Laden here. Just a note to my homies on the Iraqi soccer team: Nice job winning the Asian Cup. We were all rooting for you here in the cave. Strength be to Allah. Oh ... and also congratulations to Barry Bonds on No. 755."...

Lil Romeo, Undersized, Shoot-First Point Guard
We've already shared with you our joy that Michael Jordan's son is going to be playing for our Illini this season. He's not all that good, but he's not costing a scholarship, and it'll make sure his dad impregnates a few co-eds. It'll be fun....