si Page 980 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
Yeah, Well, Kelvin Sampson's Still A Jerk
We couldn't possibly agree more with legendary Illini basketball reporter Mark Tupper, who said, "at no time did I think Illinois was going to win that very exciting, very emotional basketball game with Indiana." It was exciting, and we had hope, and we leapt across the room with Jeffrey Jordan hit ...
We'll Miss Inside The NFL, And We Don't Think We're The Only Ones
Above is the greatest moment in "Inside The NFL" history, back when Dan Marino was still in "I'm a player and I'm pissed I never won the Super Bowl" mode. We miss that mode a little....
OK, Last Photoshop, We Promise!
Except for the ones below, that is. There's just so many amusing ones out there, that it's hard to stop. And now, for the final word on Super Bowl XLII, we'll hand the mic over to Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, who as you might imagine is quite enthused with the result. In fact, it may be his fin...
'Oh Why Didn't I Just Get A Jamba Juice Instead?'
Ah, Victor Thompson. Poor dumb sap. Let this be a lesson to all you kids out there; tattoos are permanent, but football winning streaks are not. Sure, it was all fun and games when he decided to get the Patriots logo etched into both sides of his skull earlier this season. What could possibly go wro...
Analyzing Belichick's Insane Decision Not To Kick
Of all the oddities during Super Bowl XLII, the one that might stick, and the one that might hurt the reputation of Patriots coach Bill Belichick the most, was his decision to go for it instead of sending kicker Stephen Gostkowski out for a 49-yard field goal. That doesn't look good when you lose a ...
Boy, Did You Ever Miss A Barnburner At MSG Last Night
So, if there were ever a day for the Knicks to finally get fed up with Isiah Thomas and end this madness, today would seem like a good one....
Missing The Terrible (And Amazing) Authoritarianism Of Bob Knight
When we first began studying to be a journalist at the University of Illinois — as much as one ever "studies" to be a journalist — one of our professors told us that you're not really a journalist until you've done the worst, but necessary, job in the journ world: You've called up the family of some...
Goodnight, Knight
As you've probably heard by now, Bob Knight has resigned as coach of Texas Tech because he's "tired of coaching. Obviously, much more about this tomorrow, but for now, we'll say this: Growing up, there was no more fierce Leitch family villain that Bobby Knight. He served as a stand-in for all that ...
Boston Fans, Still Struggling The Day After
After reading Bill Simmons' magnanimous column this morning, we were began to feel vaguely sympathetic to Boston fans. (Though the biggest revelation from his column is that, had the Patriots won, Simmons had set up to hang out with Tom Brady in his private entourage party room afterwards. The Gia...
Time For Another Episode Of 'Not Safe For Work Theater'
She crawled to the finish, even though she could barely move! I have no idea what that means! YEAAAHHHHHH!...
Tony Romo Needs A Date, Stat
By now, you might have seen the bizarre Tony Romo/Jessica Simpson singalong thing that the brain has yet to download, let alone comprehend....
Well, They Were Out Of Snausages
The suspect: Buddy, the black labrador. Crime: Chewing Super Bowl tickets. Last seen: Licking own privates. Other possible suspects: Rabid squirrel ... parakeet ... Roomba. Trial date: pending....
That Six Flags Venture Hasn't Worked Out Too Well For Danny Snyder And Mark Shapiro
When Redskins owner Daniel Snyder bought the Six Flags franchise back in 2005, he said he trusted former ESPN executive vice president of programming Mark Shapiro to help turn the amusement park franchise into the next Disneyland. It, uh, hasn't quite worked out that way....
Tony Romo Thinks He Can Do Better
Good news, fellows ... Jessica Simpson may soon be available. So for Heaven's sake start wearing collared shirts! (Preferably popped.) Word is that Tony Romo would like to dump her ... only she's not going easily. Hmm. Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction comes to mind here for some reason....
Larry Brown Is Happy Not To Be In New York Anymore
Larry Brown offers us a fond, cute little footnote in the epic catastrophe that is 2007 SHOTY winner Isiah Thomas' tenure with the New York Knicks. Brown wasn't exactly Mr. Sunshine and Rainbows with that team — and he clearly stopped giving a crap 10 games in — but Isiah has made sure that Brown wi...
It's Got To Be The Shoes, Money
We are sad to say that Jonah Keri has discontinued his College Basketball Closer; we will miss him. But that's not all for the Closer; we'd like to hand the mic to the gang at Storming The Floor to fill in....