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Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Harold Reynolds
All right, here we are: It's time for the Final Four. We have our ESPN side of the bracket, and then our Masturbator Locator Vs. Horse side of the bracket. All four candidates are worthy. It's time for some tough decisions, people....

Last Call For All SHOTY Voting
Tomorrow, the finals of the Sportshuman Of The Year tournament begin, and there's still some rather tight matchups. The semifinals themselves will run throughout the holiday season, and we'll continue with the finals on January 4, when we come back from vacation (which we'll also get into later this...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Barbaro Vs. Ben Roethlisberger
We're to our final quarterfinal matchup, with the semis taking place next week in a torrent of voting mania. (Or something.) We encourage you all to vote on the extremely tight Mariotti-Reynolds matchup. First, a reminder of the bracket....

Joel Zumaya Puts His Life In Rock's Hands
Remember in the American League Championship Series, when flamethrowing, red-eyeballed righthander Joel Zumaya was sidelined with a "right wrist and forearm inflammation?" It turned out not to matter, because the Tigers blitzed the A's in four games, but had there been some tighter games late, it co...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Jay Mariotti Vs. Harold Reynolds
We return to the SHOTY Tournament, with the final two quarterfinal matchups, today and Thursday. Of all the Elite Eight matchups, we think this might end up the closest. (The first two have been runaways, though you can still vote.) First, a reminder of the bracket....

'I Regret Nothinnnnnggggggg!'
On the list of things we would never attempt, right after "Barbaro message board moderator" and right before "poking Larry Allen with a sharp stick" comes this. It's base jumping, of course, but these batshit insane daring thrill-seekers have added a couple of twists over the past two years. No. 1 i...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Carl Monday Vs. Stephen A. Smith
All right: Time for the next step in the Elite Eight. This thing is gonna fly by now, by the way; the final two Elite Eight matchups will be next week, and then it's Final Four time, and then, jeez, then this whole virtual construction is completed. To remind you, here's the bracket (Berman's got a ...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Matt Leinart
At last: The first round is over, and we have our eight winners. For all the talk of potential upsets and the supposed mis-seeding of certain competitors, there was only one first round "upset": Stephen A. Smith took down Ozzie Guillen, and that was a shaky seed in the first place....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Barbaro Vs. Lamar Thomas
All right, we know this is supposed to just run Tuesdays and Thursdays, but we decided that we were too eager to finally get this first round overwith so we can start the second round tomorrow. (SI's curious pick of Mr. Wade made us decide to speed up the process a bit.) So, this is the final first ...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Ozzie Guillen Vs. Stephen A. Smith
Just two more first-round matchups left until the Elite Eight, and we've got a potential barnburner here today. (Does anyone other than Musberger use "barnburner" anymore? We like the term.)...

You Cannot Hide From Lance Armstrong
Far be it from us to insinuate that Lance Armstrong is still in the heads of the French cycling establishment, but now they're accusing him of breaking into their email....

Jake Plummer Has No Qualms About Doing This Again
Everybody has a cross to bear. Some of us were always picked last in kickball and still harbor resentment about it. Some of us have a lifelong fear of spiders, or horses, or, say, snakes. Some of us become never-nudes. We all have to overcome something....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Jay Mariotti Vs. Darren Daulton
After nearly a week off, the Deadspin SHOTY Tournament kicks back up today — just three more first-round matchups left — with a guy who seemingly shows up every week around these parts, if just to make himself more famous, against a former Philadelphia hero who has only made Deadspin once, but in a ...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Chris Berman Vs. Farney
All right, after some wild voting irregularities yesterday — remember: The Deadspin way is not to raise too much issue with people cheering on their favorites in a poll on a silly blog — we have what we'd think would be a blowout today. But you never know: Someday a No. 16 WILL beat a No. 1. Probabl...

Hey, Nice Brain Tumor, Idiot
As the Mighty MJD mentioned on Saturday, the pro-Ohio State group The Dead Schembechlers have disbanded due to the death of the actual Bo Schembechler. But we here in the U.S. do not have a monopoly on class. Over in England, Newcastle soccer coach Glenn Roeder had emergency life-saving surgery to...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Harold Reynolds Vs. Ned
Ordinarily, the SHOTY tournament will take place on Tuesdays and Thursdays, but this week, with that whole Thanksgiving business, we're going Monday-Tuesday this week. We hope your system can handle the shock....

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Carl Monday Vs. Ricky Manning Jr.
We're off to the next first-round matchup, and this one seems likely to be more of a blowout than the potential upset brewing in the Roethlisberger-Mikulik matchup. (Polls are open, by the way, until all first round matchups are completed.)...

Deadspin SHOTY Tournament: Ben Roethlisberger Vs. Joe Mikulik
All right, after what appears to be an easy victory for Matt Leinart last week, fellow losing-team quarterback Ben Roethlisberger enters the fray this week in the Deadspin Sportshuman Of The Year Tournament. (We're calling it "SHOTY.") He takes on famous freakout minor league manager Joe Mikulik in ...

Introducing The Deadspin Sportshuman Of The Year Tournament
Since Sports Illustrated is making its unveiling of the 2006 Sportsman Of The Year award into a two-month enterprise, we figured we could do the same thing. Therefore, we are introducing the Deadspin Sportshuman Of The Year tournament, where 16 nominees will compete for the sainted title. We've put ...

Nothing Like Permanent Markings Of Architecture
During our travels around Busch Stadium last week, we are sad to say we didn't come across these two toolboxes, who have tattos of old Busch Stadium and new Busch Stadium, respectively, on each of their backs. (You can see a close-up version of the tattooes at the link, if you dare.)...