v Page 3028 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Laveranues Coles: Stepping Stone To A Gay Athlete?
Is Laveranues Coles' admission that he was sexually abused by his stepfather the equivalent of a professional athlete coming out of the closet as a gay man? We wouldn't think so, but OutSports' Cyd Zeigler Jr. says they're more similar than you think....

On The DL: That Drunk, Impregnating Farnsworth
It's time for installment No. 2 of our three-part series revealing the athletes behind some of On The DL's blind-items. Last week, we found out that the ladies say Cubs second baseman Todd Walker loves to flash his wedding ring at strip clubs. Today's blind item: I'm Ok, I sWaRe...:...

Blogdome: PBR Me ASAP
• How can you not root for a golfer who wears a Pabst Blue Ribbon hat? [The Mighty MJD • Page 2 is beginning to make us cry. [Off Wing Opinion] • A tribute to Reggie White that, mercifully, doesn't include blatant homophobic rants. [Black Athlete] • The St. Louis Rams: The most dysfunctional franchi...

Jose Canseco, Professional Wrestler (Of Course)
We're not even going to pretend to be surprised here: Jose Canseco is rumored to making an appearance at Wrestlemania this spring. Perhaps it is telling that the people who are most concerned about this development are not baseball fans, but wrestling fans. Seems like the WWE — remember, that's wh...

NFL Roundup: Daunte's Blues
• If you somehow were able to make an emotionless, painless robot clone of Bea Arthur, and you pounded that clone in the face with a polo mallet for 25 minutes, then slammed that head in a car door 15 times, then severed the head with an exceptionally long and sharp toenail, then put the head in a...

Week In Deadspin: We All Wear Masks
• Ed Hochuli ... JACKED UP! • Baseball players need motivational posters too. • John Marvel did not shoot pepper spray on you in a parking lot, so stop asking. • Tom Brady tried to get it on with an Olsen twin. That's awesome. • We repeat: Bill Simmons got his first boner from Cheryl Ladd. We just...

Leftovers: Take This Job And Shove It
• There is nothing more dangerous than an angry man in compression shorts: Lance Armstrong re-retires. [Instant Punditry] • Kim Clijsters' coach quits, perhaps in a huff, we're not sure. [tennisace] • Fantasy Prison Camp: Former Braves pitcher sent to the Gray Bar Hotel. [Atlanta Journal-Constitutio...

The Return Of Little Mac
Mad propers to The Mighty MJD, who came across a short film we'll be watching all day: "The Return Of Little Mac, a dramatic rendition of what the "Mike Tyson's Punch Out" hero might be up to these days. Tortured by visions of Bald Bull, haunted by his lone victory over Mike Tyson, sitting in a ba...

There Are Fake People On Page 2, And They're In College
Uh, we're just going to go under the assumption that Jim Caple's "serialized novel" 24 College Avenue is the setup to a joke, and the "three times a week throughout the school year" is the punchline. You know, the kind of inappropriate joke that a boorish friend tells too loudly at a dinner party...

Jon Bon Jovi And Bud Selig Bring The Rock
Now, we know Bon Jovi hasn't exactly ever been, oh, underground, we guess, but on the list of Things We Imagine Rock Stars Doing That Are Debaucherous, Involve Leather Pants And Mostly Out Of Our Frame Of Reference, pre-releasing your album on MLB.com with an extra track for MLB.com customers wou...

Leftovers: But Is It Art?
• Sculptor makes shrine to Ted Williams' head. [MSN Sports Filter] • ChiSox manager Ozzie Guillen tactfully implies that one of his pitchers may be a lousy goldbricking faker. [ChiSox Rants] • Thanks for almost playing: Falcons' Kevin Mathis now out for the season. [Our Turn Next] • Help out a Patri...

The Return Of Calvinball
Inspired by a recent post at Bleed Cubbie Blue — essentially comparing last night's Cubs game to "Calvinball" — we got to thinking about "Calvin and Hobbes, specifically "Calvinball." This item may be wholly inappropriate, off-topic, apropos of nothing ... but we don't care. It's about something p...

Blogdome: Ripping Favre
• So, hey, now that we think about it ... Brett Favre was kind of a dick to Javon Walker. [Sports Frog] • Hot new hockey site launching later today, by tapped-in anonymous blogger. Hey, it's a growth industry; hockey can't get any less popular. [HockeyBuzz] • Ryan Howard is the Dontrelle Willis of h...

Calling Mom For Domestic Backup
Some more updates on the domestic abuse allegations against notoriously angry Dodgers outfielder Milton Bradley. The Daily Breeze reviewed the 911 calls that started the whole allegations, and apparently, it was in fact Bradley who made the calls in order to calm down his "crazy" wife....

About Last Night ...
You awake in a large metal container, wearing a bear costume, with a tranquilizer dart stuck in your ass ... • MLB: Andruw Jones belts 50th homer, but you guessed it, Braves still lose. • WNBA Finals: Sacramento Monarchs win Game 1 of ... oh forget it, you're not even reading this. • MLB: That big f...

Borscht Belt "Comedy" From SI
Now, we're not gonna make a habit out of this or anything, and honestly, we really don't want any trouble, but we can't let the day end without commenting on the newest column from Sports Illustrated's Steve Rushin. Now, we don't know Steve personally, and we're sure he has his virtues. He seems lik...

To Watch Tonight ...
What to watch as your children file for emancipation ... • MLB: Yankees at Devil Rays. Yanks try to win a series, finally, over last-place Tampa Bay. • WNBA Finals: Sacramento Monarchs vs. Connecticut Sun. Admit it, you're pumped. • MLB: Brewers at Diamondbacks. Milwaukee (72-72, NL Central) 20 game...

Leftovers: P.S., I Love You
• OSU tight end Ryan Hamby receives hate mail, drops it. [Around the Oval] • Rams exec leaves threatening phone message on columnist's voice mail. We love stories like that. [STL Today • Bill Simmons finally acknowledges that he works for the same company as Mario Lopez. [Sports Guy's World] • The D...

Marvel: No Road Rage Here
Earlier, we reported — as much as we "report" anything — that ESPN.com "executive editor" John Marvel had left/been forced out of ESPN after an incident in the ESPN parking lot. Marvel apparently has his Finger On The Pulse Of The Sports World, because he saw the item and wanted to clarify some ma...

Executive Editor Bounced From ESPN.com
Do you know this man? His name is John Marvel, and he was vice president and executive editor of ESPN.com until very, very recently. But now the Bristol folks have canned him/asked him to resign, and a reliable tipster tells us it's because of what they're calling a "road rage incident in the ESPN...