v Page 3075 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Golden Tate's Donut Crimes Becomes Obvious Ad Opportunity
As (sorta) predicted, Top Pot Doughnuts has turned a NFL's player's sugar addiction—and a fortuitous breaking and entering—into marketing gold. [Photo submitted by Seattle reader Jon.]...
Happy America Now Officially Insane, Possibly Jingoist About Soccer (For The Time Being)
Most of our country still hasn't come down from the afternoon spazgasm caused by the dainty foot of Landon Donovan, but remember, bandwagoners, there are people out there ready to scold your joy. Like The Nation....
Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 23
What a day, what a day. The U.S. advanced, but so did Germany and England. Australia put in a valiant effort and had two highlight-reel goals that will be ignored because of Landon Donovan's stunner....
Today, We Are All Americans High-Fiving Our Moms
Here's the first of what will probably be many U.S. goal reaction videos, and it's a good one. Whoever you are, arkansasjones, you perfectly captured the national mood when you said, "YEAAAHHYEAAAAAHH GOOAAAAALLLGOOAAALLYESSOOOOHYESSS," and then almost tackled your mom. [H/T Señor Montalban]...
LeBron Watch, Day 34: The "LeBron Leaves Cleveland" Doomsday Scenario
In a little more than a week, LeBron James could be a Knick. He could be a Bull. And if he is anything but a Cav, the impact on Cleveland could be staggering. One passionate fan's ultimate nightmare scenario for his hometown....
Here's Video Of Landon Donovan's Winner (Music-Free Update)
In the 91st minute of a 0-0 draw, after a great throw by Tim Howard, Landon Donovan led the attack downfield, culminating in a put back goal by Landycakes himself. Just like that, the USMNT's stay in South Africa was extended....
World Cup Open Thread: Slovenia-England
SO MANY POSSIBILITIES! Comment about the game action if you're watching this one instead of that other game that is GOING. ON. RIGHT. NOW....
"BroncoGator" T-Shirt Proves Florida Fans Can't Quit Tim Tebow
A devout Tim Tebow fan manages to accurately illustrate his obsession while simultaneously violating not one, but two registered trademarks. Honestly didn't see that cease and desist coming? Did NFL Legal change its delivery? [BroncoGator/ESPN]...
PING! It's College World Series Time!
Actually, it has been for several days already, but by request, here's a CWS open thread. No. 1 Arizona State got bounced today and Oklahoma plays Clemson in the nightcap. No offense, but I'm watching "The Two Escobars." [AP Photo]...
Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 22
The knockout stages are a little clearer after today, with four teams moving on. Nigeria's Kalu Uche probably had the nicest goal, but the Super Eagles knocked out after its draw with the Good Korea....
James Blake Calls Pam Shriver An Ass — During Play
Blake didn't take kindly to ESPN's sideline reporter analyzing his poor play within earshot. So he shared a few thoughts of his own with her....
Spirit Airlines Graduates From Hornball Puns About Oral Sex To Hornball Puns About Catastrophic Oil Spills
The crappy budget carrier, known for its studiedly edgy marketing tailored to the Cocks-hats-and-Rohypnol crowd, is now cracking wise about the BP oil spill: "Check Out The Oil On Our Beaches." Seriously? Who besides Joe Hazelwood is this supposed to appeal to? [Sparty & Friends]...
Lionel Messi And Carlos Tevez Vow To Reform Oasis
Carlos Tevez and Lionel Messi have promised to offer swaggering Mancunians Noel and Liam Gallagher a blank cheque to reform Oasis, if Argentina win the World Cup this year....
Potentially Slutty Star Of Lakers Parade Revealed
The woman offering her boning services to Lakers guard Sasha Vujacic during yesterday's parade has been revealed. The woman holding the "Spoon the crap out of me, Adam Morrison" sign is still at large. [SBB]...
World Cup Open Thread: France-South Africa; Mexico-Uruguay
We have simultaneous games today. Can France get its shit together against the host nation? Can Mexico grab a point to move onto the next round? Toggle back and forth and comment below....
Steelers Fans Need To Learn That No Parking Means No Parking
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Steve Smith Actually Broke His Arm Playing Flag Football. Against Adults.
Despite initially trying to blame his broken arm on roughhousing children—children!—it has become apparent that Carolina's All-Pro wideout actually injured himself trying to take over an adult rec league. That may be the saddest thing ever....
Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup For June 21
Today we saw a feeding frenzy in the Portugal-North Korea game, Chile putting itself in good position for the round of 16, and Spain showing everyone why it's still a favorite. Another favorite: snickering at foreign cultures through culturally insensitive music placement....
Your Culturally Insensitive Weekend World Cup Goal Roundup, June 19-20
What a weekend: New Zealand played Italy to a draw; Luis Fabiano got away with two handballs; and Denmark scored a pair of beauties. But how would these moments look when scored to music betraying a distinct lack of cultural sensitivity?...
Crucial Relationship Advice Spoken Drunkenly To Teenagers: Cheat On All Your Girlfriends
I went to a bachelor party this weekend in a seaside town. There was eating, and drinking, and a failed attempt to get two Polish Food Lion clerkettes to come over and massage the groom....