v Page 3086 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Sioux City Promotional Video Is So Awful, You'll Want To Move There Ironically
By gathering notable townsfolk for this Up With People-esque extravaganza (and by not paying any attention to Starship's lyrics), Sioux City's promo video has now supplanted Cleveland's as the most unintentionally hilarious instance of civic self-love. H/T @edsbs....

Drew Rosenhaus Breaking Flaming Bricks Is A Metaphor For His Negotiating Skills ... Or Something
Turns out Drew Rosenhaus, noted driveway-press-conference hobbyist, also enjoys training in the martial arts when he isn't forcing your favorite team to give an extra year and $3 million dollar roster bonus to Olindo Mare. [Tauntr]...

Secret Of Nats Success? Pretend They're The Rays
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Boston Mayor Needs A Refresher Course On Boston Sports
Confused Mayor Thomas Menino reminiscences about some of Beantown's "ionic" sports moments: "Havlicek stole the ball, Fisk waiving the ball fair, Flutie launching the Hail Mary pass, Varitek splitting the uprights." No mention of Antoine Walker's bloody shoulder pads? [Globe]...

Chat With Will Leitch Until He Drops (UPDATE: He's Dropped)
Will's in the comments, and he will remain there until you're through with him. Remember to read his book, Are We Winning Ben Stein's Money? And read this, too, while you're at it. UPDATE: He's done, just shy of the three-hour mark....

Erin Andrews: "Darrin's Dance Grooves" Superstar
Ten years ago, Darrin Henson was the Tom Emanski of instructional dance videos. He had one enthusiastic pupil, though. Yes, at the :45 mark, the future Sideline Princess was doing her best hard-sell on one of the lamest infomercial videos ever....

Because Shaking Hands With Brian Scalabrine Is A Total Jinx
Scalabrine, the red-headed bench warmer, never gets to join in any reindeer games. Maybe it was the Clark Griswold lounge-cruising footwear that caused Tony Allen and Big Baby Davis to just blatantly ignore him. (H/T MK Migraine) [YouTube]...

Steve Nash Beamed Into Conference Finals
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Potato Chip Ad Manages To Titillate, Enrage Island Nation
Hunky Dory, an Irish potato chip syndicate, has come under fire for an ad series that claims they are "Proud Sponsors of Irish Rugby." That, and because the ads feature all the scantily-clad women's rugby action you could ask for....

How To Change A Fucking Diaper
In honor of Mother's Day, and with a nod to The Awl, here is your belligerent guide to changing a kid's filth-laden diaper. You're welcome, assholes....

Join Us Monday For A Marathon Live Chat With Will Leitch
Leitch will be taking your questions at 1 p.m. tomorrow — about his book, about whatever — and he says he'll hang around until you have none left. We're gunning for your record, Neyer....

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat-Geek Mockery: Dan Shaughnessy And Pudding
Ladies and germs, I give you Dan Shaughnessy, from his aforementioned Globe column:...

A Lovely Short Film For A Warm Spring Day: "Wiffleball '79"
"AJ,I thought you might enjoy my short film "Wiffleball '79." I did. I really did. You will, too. [YouTube]...

Miami University Had The Pukiest, Poopiest, Sexiest Spring Formal Ever
On April 9, 2010, Miami University's Pi Beta Phi fraternity for women held a spring formal at the quaint Lake Lyndsay Lodge in Hamilton, Ohio. The sloppy, slutty details of what transpired that boozy enchanted evening are tremendous....

Ted Leonsis: Greatest Owner Ever?
As his first act as owner of the Wizards (and the Verizon Center), Leonsis will take down the Washington Mystics' attendance banners. All the Mystics fans will be chartering a single Volkswagen Golf to drive to the protest. [Ted's Take]...

Barca Striker Is Not Gay, He Insists Loudly
This photo of Barcelona's Gerard Pique and Zlatan Ibrahimovic has been making the rounds, with the expected chatter. Ibra had this to say to a reporter: "Come to my house with your sister and see if I'm queer." [via Dirty Tackle]...

Private Stache: Magic The Gathering
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....

Not-So-Great Memorabilia For A Great Cause
Vince Young is partnering to help raise money for Tennessee flood victims: donate $100, and receive an autographed photo. But don't worry, we checked; donate $150, and they won't send the photo. [Vincent Young Foundation]...

Another Take On Lax Culture And The UVA Murder
"Imagine the families. Chevy Chase, Maryland and Cockeysville, Maryland are only about an hour apart. George Huguely and Yeardley Love had been dating for some time. The families had to have met, right?" Now that's a heart-breaking lede. [SB Nation]...

So, About That Cubs-Lighting-Their-Farts Story
By now you've probably heard the rumor that Chicago's Jeff Baker missed time because he burned his backside trying to light a fart in the clubhouse. We thought this was worth some investigation....