v Page 3181 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Cowboys Picked Themselves Another Winner
Meet David Beuhler, place kicker out of USC and fifth-round draft selection of the Dallas football organization. I want to party with you and your miniature horse, Cowboy. [Dallas Morning News]...
New Jersey Would Probably Like That Last Minute Back
It's one thing to give up the game-tying goal in the last 1:20 of a Game 7, but to give up a game-tying and game-winning goal in the last 1:20—that's probably going to haunt you....
I Am Now Genuinely Concerned About Tommy Lasorda's Health
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
You Suck, Schuster!
A double in the top of the third ended Patrick Schuster's bid for a fifth consecutive no-hitter. [TampaTribune]...
Matt Vasgersian Speaks!: Not A Racist, Just A Terrible Comedian
"I'm an idiot...Save the racial stuff which is just flat out wrong, almost all of what has been posted on my regrettably horrific timing is spot on...Nobody feels worse about it than I do." [KSK]...
The University Of Oregon's Ultimate Frisbee Team Knows What It Means To Be ULTIMATE, Man
Suspended for off-field antics, the team got all "Footloose" at a school board meeting: "Speeding, drinking, nudity - they're not bad things. They're things a big portion of the community doesn't think are wrong." [SeattleTimes]...
Matt Vasgersian Continues To Have Trouble With Live Television
Brad Hawpe was carted off the field last night after being hit hard with an errant pick-off throw. It was scary moment, made more awkward by Matt Vasgersian's subtle, yet poorly executed brand of "humor."...
Denver Nuggets Do Not Feel Remorse Or Pity
The Nuggets beat the Hornets by 58 points last night, tying an NBA record for heartless cruelty. Why do you make them hit you like that, New Orleans? [ProBasketballNews; Denver Stiffs]...
Someone Got A Hit Off Of Stephen Strasburg? What?
The pitcher who's going to have major league teams tanking games by July gave up a three-run homer and threw 121 pitches on Friday, but don't worry folks, he still won....
Post-Marathon Interview Is The Biggest Endurance Test Of All
Kara Goucher, you just finished third in the Boston Marathon. Would you mind standing still for five minutes while my incompetent news crew gets their act together? And may I call you Sara?...
Former Footballer Seeks Justice For His Son's Murder
If you have time today, you really should read the story of former pro football player Vidal Mills and his obsession with finding and punishing the men who murdered his son....
Russian Website Publishes Photos Of Alexei Cherepanov's Blood Doping Injections
Russian hockey prospect Alexei Cherepanov died on the ice last year and in the post-mortem was accused of blood doping, an accusation made slightly more credible by these photos of him happily taking injections in his arm....
The Atlantic League Is Where Baseball Careers Refuse To Die
Can't afford MLB tickets? Try the Atlantic League, where dozens of former all-stars/has-beens give you a near-Major League experience at a fraction of the cost. Don't get too close to Carl Everett. [Jorge Says No]...
OK, Just How Did Michael Crabtree Slip To No. 10 In The Draft?
As if from a Dickens novel, the 49ers found Michael Crabtree in a basket on their porch on Saturday with a note pinned to his blanket: One receiver, courtesy of Mr. Al Davis, Esq....
A Bold New Sanchez-To-Burress Era For Jets Fans?
Jets general manager Mike Tannenbaum said that the Jets contacted agent Drew Rosenhaus prior to the draft to ask about Plaxico Burress's legal situation. [USA Today]...
Throwback Uniforms That Will Possibly Make You Want To Throw Up
If there's one thing that history has taught us, it's that mustard yellow and brown are excellent choices for professional sports uniform colors. See, this is why I miss you, American Football League....
And Now The Bill Cosby-Erin Andrews Comedy Minute
This is what happens when you try to put on 15 hours of continuous live coverage of an inherently boring event. Like there weren't already enough senile old men rambling at NFL Live desk....
Fine: There Is No Greater Bond Between Father And Son Hockey Fans Than Celebratory Fellatio
That headline is going to be a Google goldmine. [YouTube]...
Stephen A. Smith Still Has Remarkable Confidence That Stephen A. Smith Can Continue Being Stephen A. Smith
Stephen A. Smith is taking his ESPN loser's lap to the airwaves, but is still passionately promoting STEPHEN A. THE BRAND to whomever gives him the opportunity to talk about himself....
Irrelevancy At Its Finest
South Carolina kicker Ryan Succop becomes the infamous 256th player chosen in the 2009 NFL Draft. He seemed pretty confident about getting picked. Next step before football, pomp and circumstance. [Shutdown Corner]...