v Page 3200 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Nationals' Mascot Has A New Look! (Oh, Heavens)
This photo was taken a couple of hours ago at ESPN Zone in D.C., and should have been immediately destroyed. Presenting the new look for Screech the Eagle ... it's The Island of Dr. Moreau!...
Kurt Warner Operates On A Higher Moral Plane Than You And I
Kurt Warner is visiting the 49ers as we speak, and he arrived the same way that Jesus always traveled; in a private jet. But it wasn't just to create leverage in his contract negotiations....
Brandon Marshall No Longer Disorderly
ESPN.com's Michael Smith reports that the case against Brandon Marshall has been dismissed. A suspension for bad off-field behavior still pending after league reviews the incident. This was his fourth arrest since March 2006. [ESPN.com]...
Brandon Marshall Arrested Again
For disorderly conduct in Atlanta. Beware the firm hand of Goodell, Brandon. Now, that he might not be available for the season, maybe Jay Cutler will reconsider that trade scenario? [Denver Post.com]...
Will Sean Avery Get His ... Second Chance?
Dallas is expected to put Sean Avery on re-entry waivers on Monday, a move long planned that would send him back to the New York Rangers. Except ... things have changed slightly....
How Far Does Duke Have To Go To Get A Foul Called?
All Duke guard Jon Scheyer wanted to do yesterday was get a foul call or maybe a tie up—and despite all his efforts shimmying through this double team, the refs would not oblige. What gives?...
Oh, Lady, This Probably Wasn't A Good Idea
The New England Patriots held open cheerleader tryouts today and it appears one woman, 41-years-spry-and-sassy, Shelly Lawlor, feels she's up to the challenge. Good for her?...
Farewell, Brian Dawkins?
This is a sad day for Philadelphia Eagles fans. Brian Dawkins, long-time safety and recent perfecter of legalized helmet-to-helmet knockout hits, is heading to Bronco country next season, according to one report....
Pacman Jones Making Most Of His Current Unemployment
So, here's some interesting news. Ex-Cowboys' defensive back/special teamer/trouble-magnet Adam "Pacman" Jones has now signed up for the upcoming season of "Pros Vs. Joes." What could possibly go wrong?...
Who's Up For Condom Shopping With Anna Kournikova?
No, no — it's not what you think. She's training to be a Haitian drug mule....
Big, Bold ESPN Book Will Showcase Bristol's Not Ready For Primetime Players
Yesterday it was revealed that Tom Shales and James A. Miller, co-authors of the fascinating Live From New York! uncensored history of SNL are currently working on one about ESPN. Brace yourselves....
Maurice Clarett Seeks Salvation, Bandwidth
Maurice Clarett: Prison blogger? Yep, the former running back who is serving time for robbery and other charges has been blogging from prison since Oct. of 2008, according to his archives....
The Glory That Was Operation Scheyerface
Yes, Duke beat Maryland in a key ACC men's basketball matchup on Wednesday, but sometimes the most important victories are not won on the court, but in the stands. Behold: Operation Scheyerface, v2.0....
PETA Vs. Canada ... You Knew It Had To End This Way
See, this is where PETA miscalculated rather badly; I would have no problem clubbing a guy in a baby seal costume. In fact, I'd walk several blocks out of my way to do it....
Sports Fella Still Miffed That ESPN Won't Let Him Run The Place
There's been little or no compelling Sports Fella/WWL melodrama in recent weeks, but yesterday, thankfully, Simmons is back to using his podcast to undermine his employer once again....
Wake The Kids And Hide The Pets, Michael Vick Is Heading Home
Michael Vick could be released from prison as early as May 21, say government officials, and sent to a halfway house. Which, in this case, will be his own house....
Duke Survives Prank Call Barrage, Beats Maryland Anyway
Despite a long sleepless night of running refrigerator jokes, Duke somehow managed to get some rest in during their 18-hour wait for tipoff and were able to outlast Maryland....
Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report
You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie....
Some Spring Training News That Really Isn't News
In a development absolutely no one could have predicted, the Indians' Kerry Wood may miss some time with a sore back. [Cleveland Plain Dealer]...
Connecticut Governor Lashes Out At Calhoun
Are Jim Calhoun and Connecticut governor M. Jodi Rell officially feuding? Rell had a few choice things to say about the coach today, and it is ON, sister!...