w Page 4999 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Megan Fox Will Kick You In The Boner
Jennifer's Body tanked this weekend. I assume there are any number of reasons why. But somewhere on that list has to be the fact that people aggressively don't give a shit about Megan Fox....
I'm Sure He Has The Same Heidi Watney Airbrush On The Side Of His Van
Well, maybe it's her uncle. A very proud, very creepy uncle. There's a chance of that, right? [Busted Coverage]...
Chris Fowler Feels Clemson Fan's Pain (Not Really)
If you watched Georgia Tech beat Clemson two weeks ago, you might have noticed this Tiger fan's Oscar reel for Most Distraught Football Fanatic and the announcing crew's on-air sympathy. Of course, off the air was a different story....
And Down Goes A Yalie
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories...
Herschel Walker: "You're Never Too Old To Get Your Ass Kicked"
At 47, Hall of Fame running back Herschel Walker is the latest NFL retiree to jump on the MMA bandwagon. Walker, who just signed a contract with Strikeforce, is a sixth-degree taekwondo black belt, whatever that's good for. [FanHouse]...
If Boxing Weren't Dead Already, Max Kellerman Would've Killed It On Saturday
The most entertaining part of Saturday's Mayweather-Marquez fight—and I use that term loosely—was Max Kellerman's post-fight confrontation with Mayweather. It is the most abrasive piece of broadcast journalism since Jim Gray's All-Star Game interrogation of Pete Rose....
Mark Sanchez Overpraise Poised To Annoy The Hell Out Of Us
Mark Sanchez possesses a certain je ne sais quoi. So how to describe him, just two games into his NFL career? If only there were some hackneyed bit of praise that elevates competence into a kind of holy state ......
Rex Ryan's Voicemail Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like New York Jets coach Rex Ryan, who won this weekend with one well-placed phone call. No, it wasn't to Batman....
This Must Have Looked Awesome On The Jerrytron
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Fire! Fire! Fire!
If you've got a javelin lodged in your leg, what do you do? If you're the Chinese, you burn it! [Daily Star]...
It's Like Tim McCarver Talking, But To Music!
Don't wait until tomorrow morning to leave a voicemail for your boss saying you won't be coming in on Tuesday. That's the day Tim McCarver's new album drops....
The Cubs Cannot Be Sold Until Shawon Dunston Takes Freshman Lit
"Looks like everything is running smoothly with the sale of the Cubs. Let's just finalize everything with your signature here, and...hold on, what's this? A retired journeyman shortstop never went to college?"...
We've Sighted The Elusive Hardcore Jags Fan
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Is Michael Crabtree The Devil? Michael Rosenberg Thinks So
To the naked eye, Michael Crabtree's holdout symbolizes two things: greed and stupidity...but pure evil? SI's Michael Rosenberg reveals the twisted truth behind San Francisco's stubborn rookie....
Floyd "Fatty" Mayweather Fined For Performance Enhancing Blubber
Floyd Mayweather weighed 146 pounds at yesterday's weigh-in, 2 pounds over the stipulated limit for tonight's fight against Juan Marquez. The flub(ber) will cost him 600k, at 300k per pound...If only my girlfriend had that clause. Zing! [ESPN]...
Twitter Officially Ruins Perfectly Good Rivalry
The hype leading up to Sunday's Jets-Patriots game has been lame: boring phone messages, oddly specific threats, and now a very catty twitter fight between two grown men that reads like an argument between 7th grade girls....
Peyton Appreciates His Receivers & Tight Ends
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
The End Is At The Beginning
The day started with creatively shaved dudes and that's how the day shall end. This is Andrew from Temple University, who submitted his own picture because Miami's unchecked hairy chested ACC aggression will not stand....
Playground's Michael Jordan
New York magazine's excellent Sam Anderson reviews Flight, the magisterial Michael Jordan biography written and illustrated by Sam Anderson, age 13. [New York]...
A <em>Star Wars</em> Geek, Randy Wolf Is
Asked, in the best Q&A ever, which Star Wars character would make the ideal baseball player, Wolf responds: "[T]he Emperor is unstoppable. He seems like he could pretty much get it done." It's true. His stuff is electric. [StarWars.com]...