w Page 5006 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Smokin' Jay: Cutler Sure Does Clean Up Nicely
Judging by this month's Michigan Avenue Magazine, the new Bears quarterback wants to mount a serious challenge to Matt Ryan as the best-looking ball-slinger in the NFL. What else is he saying with these hot new looks?...
Why Your Team Sucks: Miami Dolphins
Some people are fans of the Miami Dolphins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Miami Dolphins. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....
It's Going To Be A Fun Year In South Bend
This mysterious billboard was erected in South Bend this week, just across the street from the Notre Dame campus. Oh, that's sweet of Irish fans to throw their support behind beleaguered head coach Charlie Weis like....heyyyyyy, wait a second!...
Tony Romo Unsheaths His Sword For Another Blonde Creature
Candice Crawford is the name of the woman who will inevitably serve as a scapegoat for the Cowboys' inconsistent offense this year. [NYDN]...
U.S. Open Tells Players To Get Off Twitter
Tournament officials warn players not to broadcast "inside information" via Twitter. (Apparently, people gamble on tennis.) Naturally, playerscomplain about it via Twitter. Also, women don't know how to serve or something. Who cares? As long as they keep grunting! [SMH/Switched/NYT]...
Winnipeg Stockpiling Malcontents
Charles Rogers, the original Matt Millen WR bust, will be joining Pac Man in Winnipeg. Since his 2005 release, Rogers has been battling drug addition to return to football. He reportedly still owes the Lions $8.5 Million[PFT]...
Redskins Cut Out Middle Man, Sell Directly To Scalpers
Did I say "scalpers"? That's so politically incorrect! I meant that "brokers" are the ones allowed to buy blocks of tickets from that team with a racial slur nickname, instead of the fans on their notoriously long waiting list....
And One To Grow On
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
Bengals' First Pick's Three-Part Fail: Fat, Injured, And A Bengal
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
A Small Way To Liven Up Any Fantasy Draft
You might've missed this fantasy football draft over the weekend, and it's your loss. Like many, it took place in a hotel room. But unlike most, it featured those two magic little words: midget strippers....
Thomas Howard Likes To Feel Pretty Every Now And Then
"Just finished getting a pedicure. Its been a while since I've had one. It was relaxing for a while there, I even dozed off for a minute." [Twitter via reader Tom]...
Watch As Your Childhood Gets Choked Out
Jason David Frank, best only known as the Green Power Ranger, is entering MMA. His first opponent will be the winless Lord Zedd. [MMA Weekly]...
Reach For The Heavens! Or At Least Use A Ladder
You think embarrassing team photos are a new phenomenon? Check these three light-in-the-loafers Jayhawks from a few years back. I implore you, keep sending these in. After the jump, an unidentified high school team utilizes hardware, for some reason....
The Math Of Kahn: Ricky Rubio's Deal In Spain Could Work Out For Timberwolves
As expected, the Basketball Jonas has signed with FC Barcelona, meaning he'll join the NBA in 2011, at the earliest. This is bad news for basketball fans and Gillette's marketing department but maybe — maybe — not David Kahn's Timberwolves....
The 2009 New York Mets: A Season Of Failure
The New York Mets are not the worst team in baseball. They are not even the most ineptly run franchise in their own division. Yet, their 2009 campaign may have forever redefined the concept of losing....
Oklahoma State Fans Incensed Over New Lame-Ass Fight Song
The Oklahoma State Cowboys are unveiling a new pre-game song this year which has some alumni and current students upset due to the tune's overall nonsensical wussiness. Cowboys Forever, y'all....
Erin Andrews Still Being Victimized
By People magazine. Wrong blonde lady who was supposedly boned by a steely-eyed Red Sox catcher, guys! [People]...
Matt Ryan Is A Handsome Man, Science Proves
The screeching teenyboppers at the Wall Street Journal bring word that Matt Ryan is the most knee-meltingly dreamy quarterback in the NFL. It's true because science says so. And believe it or not, this actually sort of matters....
Why Your Team Sacks: New England Patriots
Some people are fans of the New England Patriots. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New England Patriots. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter grou......
What Is The Michigan Story Really About?
Everyone is really worked up about Rich Rodriguez and his problems at Michigan, but maybe there's something else going on here that doesn't have anything to do with the Wolverines....