x Page 966 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Get Ready For Football's Greatest Showcase ... For Me To Poop On
If you're like me, you're eschewing a Super Bowl party this year and inviting all neighborhood pets over to watch Puppy Bowl V, which should have the same amount of peeing on the carpet anyway....
The Ludicrousness Of The Buzzsaw Bowl
So, here's a confession: About 11 years ago, I had a dream about Matt Leinart....
Kobe Bryant: He's Just Not That Into Poo
I'm always torn on my feelings about Kobe Bryant. Talent aside, his personality always seems a little prickly and pretentious; it's like he's burdened by his greatness and just can't communicate with inferior beings....
Super Bowl Parties, Jenn Sterger And You
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....
That's No Buzzsaw
This is a level of dedication to the Pittsburgh Steelers that will forever be questioned by the men in her life. I don't think she cares....
GoDaddy.Com Reveals Its Annual Suggestive Ad Destined To Anger People
It's always amazing to me that GoDaddy.com scrapes together enough money each year to buy time during the Super Bowl, but they do....
Larry Fitzgerald Sr. And Rick Reilly Both Thank Slate Writer For Punchbowl Turd
Fitzgerald Sr.: "Negatives come from haters. They can believe in whatever they want to believe in." Reilly: "Looks like someone just got a new search button and decided to use it." [CNBC]...
Super Bowl Sub-Plot #6: Larry Effin' Fitzgerald
There are several key storylines that will be beaten into the ground by everyone who covers the Super Bowl over the next week. We will beat them down even further....
SWF Seeks Any Man Who's Breathing For Matrimony, Possible Attention Whoring
With three days to go, Amy Borkowski is only a few dollars short of her goal to raise $3 million to buy a 30-second Super Bowl ad. Exactly how short? $2,993,795....
ESPN Chat Is Clearly Pulling Out All The Stops
Wait, a chance to chat with a member of the Detroit Lions AND Jared from Subway, on the same day? This truly is the greatest country there ever was. [ESPN Chat Schedule]...
That's Some Mighty Fine Police Work There, Lou
Police in Chicopee, Mass., say they have finally captured the man responsible for a string of area bank robberies conducted while wearing the new Boston Red Sox 'hanging sox' cap. [Red Sox Monster]...
What, No Retractable Roof?
OK, this is quite possibly, as the builders claim, the most excellent snack food stadium ever built. But we still have questions. Such as: Was it publicly or privately financed?...
Eh, Screw It: Jason Whitlock Is The Friendly, Outgoing Sort
Everyone's favorite columnist is just chilling as usual. This time he took some time out of his busy schedule to snap a photo with two women doing missionary work in Vegas this past summer....
Super Bowl Sub-Plot #5: The Strip Clubs Of Tampa
There are several key storylines that will beaten into the ground by everyone who covers the Super Bowl over the next week. We will beat them down even further....
Jeff Reed Is Getting Accustomed To His Surroundings
We're four days from the big game, and a certain Steelers kicker is determined to be well lubricated. "Neil Rackers would never be so ill-behaved." [Kissing Suzy Kolber]...
Antonio Margarito Accused Of Illegal Hands To The Face
Boxing authorities are investigating the "irregular hand wraps" that Antonio Margarito nearly used in his fight with Sugar Shane Mosely, marking the first time in history boxing's integrity was called into question. [Ring]...
The Super Bowl Does Not Want Your Erotic Fruits And Veggies
Our story so far: PETA produced a Super Bowl ad that featured scantily-clad women doing naughty things with vegetables. Somehow, Sean Salisbury and Whoopi Goldberg got involved. Then things got weird ......
The Ballad Of Brenda And Kurtis The Stock Boy
Sports is a cold and cynical world, but its nice to know that uplifting tales of goodness can be found in the abyss. Oh, look... your mom just forwarded you an email from 1999!...
Steelers Fullback Dodges Biggest Bullet In History
Sean McHugh thought his life was over after getting cut by the Lions in September. He's playing in the Super Bowl on Sunday. Who knew getting released by Detroit could have a silver lining? [Yahoo]...
Not-So-Secret Origin Of The Bud Bowl, Including Surprise, Alternate Ending
Possibly the most enduring Super Bowl advertising campaign of all time was the Bud Bowl, in which football-playing longneck bottles taught us how to love watery, American-made beer once again....