Well, stupid begets stupid. The Marlins have been selling the 9,100 unused tickets to Henderson Alvarez's walk-off no-hitter in the season finale. Dumb, but not unbearably so. Until they fucked up the date on the print-out tickets.

Look, if you're going to sell shitty vanity PDFs—which is despicable and perverse and naturally the Marlins are doing this instead of sending real tickets—the least you can do is get the goddamn date right. It's the whole reason to spend $15 (plus fees) for one of these monstrosities. Here's a screenshot of the ticket they sent reader Steve, for the game Sunday, September 29, 2013:

October 3rd is a Thursday, for anyone counting. In the interest of reader service, here's a PDF of a ticket with the correct date (all personal information altered or removed), because the Marlins use Helvetica and it took 90 seconds, and also because $39 for two PDFs is a vile perversion of natural order.


Thanks Steve