Sometimes, a story comes along with absolutely no rooting interest, no good guys at all, that you end up hoping everyone will end up in a Reservoir Dogs-esque Mexcian standoff, guns aimed at each other's heads, all pulling the trigger.
It is a rare polarizing figure who is able to bring together the opposing forces of the Chicago White Sox and the Chicago Cubs ... and ESPN's and the Chicago Sun-Times' Jay Mariotti, inevitably, is that man. In a letter from White Sox chairman Jerry Reinsdorf and Cubs president Andy McPhail, addressed to Sun-Times publisher John Cruickshank, the two men blast Mariotti for making "no effort to be the least bit informed." The issue is steroids, and column Jay wrote about Bud Selig's poor handling of the steroid "problem" in baseball. The two executives detail, dubiously, Selig's "vigorous pursuit" to solve the prevalence of steroids in baseball, and then they throw in the kicker, saying, "If Mariotti would ever trouble himself to make a phone call, maybe he would get the story right."
So, you can see where we're torn here. On one hand, we have Jerry freaking Reinsdorf defending Bud Selig's record on steroids. Yet on the other, we have Jay Mariotti, a guy we have a suspicion, as Reinsdorf and McPhail note, hasn't made a phone call to a source in years. Hmm.
"Put that gun down!"
"No, YOU put that gun down!"