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If there were any real cosmic justice out there, stories such as this would not be allowed to happen; a wise, all-knowing God, concerned only with the greater good, would hurl a giant meteor right directly into our equator first. But ours is a stark, lonely universe, devoid of reason, and we are powerless to stop news items such as this.

David Beckham, late of Real Madrid and the English national team, has decided to take up coaching now that his playing career is apparently over. His first pupil? Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's adopted son, Maddox. From The Daily Mail:

The footy-mad five-year-old has already enrolled at the David Beckham Soccer Academy in Los Angeles, and now Pitt, 42, wants the ex-England captain to give Cambodian-born Maddox some one-on-one coaching.

It was all arranged, states The Mail, by ex-British soccer star-turned-actor Vinnie Jones. But somehow this story just doesn't seem complete. There must be more ...

The Beckhams already count Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes among their pals and are rumoured to want to move to LA after he retires from football.

Ah, that's better.

Beckham's New Job Is To Coach Brad Pitt's Son [Daily Mail]