When Your ERA Is 0.04, Nobody Cares Whom You Took To PromS

One of the women in this photo — we're not sure which one, and we're not gonna go try and find out, lest their father hunt us down and call us out in the pages of a national newspaper — is Katie Osburn, a pitcher for Allen Park Cabrini high school in Michigan. Well, we say "a" pitcher, but we really mean "the" pitcher; Osburn has started every inning of every game this season and given up exactly one run. Her team just won the state title. Guess who pitched?

Osburn pitched another shutout, sealing the record for fewest runs allowed in a season (one). Oh, and she pitched a no-hitter, too. Her 12th of the year. Take that, Nolan Ryan! (Seriously, check out the "Cabrini by the numbers" section of the linked article—26 straight shutouts? a .730 average for their leading hitter? Crazy.)

Her ERA ended at 0.04. You can't tell us she wouldn't do better in the bigs than Kip Wells.

This Is Not Your Mother's Softball [Three And Out]