I just threw up all over my floor. Fuck tequila. — bubbacj24

As a UConn fan I am literally nauseous. We just got a BS call to beat Temple. I don't think there's any game plan on how to react to that. — zls44

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If Lloyd Carr loses today, his Samoan lawyer advises him to rent a very fast car with no top, Acapulco shirts, the cocaine, a tape recorder, loaded to the teeth, get the hell out of Ann Arbor for at least 48 hours. Despite his racial handicap, that man is very valuable. — liquidwisdom33

You think when Corso dies that Herbie will have a giant, stuffed head of ol' Lee to put on at Game Day? That'd be touching... and fucking weird. — eDayStat

I'm a little worried that Penn State only beat Buffalo 45-24 today. We didn't look overly impressive against Notre Dame, either. — puzzlepiece87

Best thing about the UW-Citadel game? My girlfriend's ass. — goathair

As Brandon James returned that opening Tennessee punt for a TD, I think I saw Phil Fullmer eating a rack of BBQ ribs. — Quack

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Brandon James returns one that doesn't get called back? I almost... almost feel bad for UT today. And that's before the offense even gets on the field. — TattooedMess(iah)

After four minutes, it's official — life is over. Michigan blows even against Notre Dame, Chad Henne in street clothes looks like one of the Dick in a Box guys, and Jonathan Edwards sold "Sunshine" to a fucking car commercial. At least I've got Paul Maguire warning to look out for a fake punt from the Michigan endzone on 4th and 40 — prestonseider

Dropped snaps, bad end-arounds, punting from the end zone, and we're not even five minutes into ND-UM. Please, football Gods, please let this game be allowed somehow to end in a 0-0 tie. — Signal To Noise

I'm really enjoying this right now. This is just blissful. I was gonna write in angrily when ESPN missed a Notre Dame botched snap and fumble for an in-game update, but then I realized that there will be more of those plays later on. And there have been two more fumbles since then. This is excellent. — AsInHowe

Instead of Michigan-Notre Dame, ABC is airing Degrassi: The Next Generation on the west coast. I'm honestly not sure which one is more fey. — Holly

I can't be the first person to realize this, but changing Mike Hart's last name to Hunt makes the ND/Michigan game good for a minimum of a dozen extra sophomoric chuckles. — theavignonpapacy

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Perhaps Notre Dame should line up on offense in the opposite direction, so their fumbles and errant snaps will move the ball "forward." — Suss

When this season started I had dreams of a Rose Bowl with teams whose QB's were named Booty and Henne. Now all I can do is make jokes about Oregon State and Beavers. — jamie815

Notre Dame's performance is making me question Catholicism. On a side note I fully expect a special on Discovery Health called "The 600 pound coach". — lidleflightclass

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You know how they have a removable eagle head for the US seal in the oval office so the eagle can look at arros in wartime and olive branches in peace? They need one of those is South Bend on touch down Jesus that allows him to frown in seasons like these. ND is a disgrace. — Jed in the UP

(OK, that's all the 'Hugh' I've got in me. I think you guys broke my keyboard. Well done. Golf clap, golf clap, golf clap ...)