Saturday Night Football Live From SomewhereS

I have no idea how you guys watch all of this college football action AND the NFL. Seriously. My retinas are shot and my back is effin' killing me. And it's only Saturday! Gah! You guys must be machines! (Well, that, or really, really fat.)

Anyway, if you're still up for it — and by "up for it" I mean lying on the couch with chips — tonight's schedule pits No. 1 USC at No. 14 Nebraska (ABC), No. 21 Boston College at No. 15 Georgia Tech (ESPN 2), Arkansas at Satan's school (ESPN) and whole bunch of other games I'm too lazy to look up. But whatever, I'm sure you'll find a game you like. You're smart like that.

And oh, before I go, you should probably know that I'm considering joining my buddy's birthday golf pub-crawl tonight. It's pretty simple/stupid: one drink equals one stroke, a pint's par is four. So, yeah, if I don't start posting until like 4 pm tomorrow, you'll know I drank a strong back nine. Until tomorrow.