Deadspin
By now, you might have seen the bizarre Tony Romo/Jessica Simpson singalong thing that the brain has yet to download, let alone comprehend.
Now that A.J. has left us, it's up to others to try and fill his pointy, elfin shoes and feed us some delicious Cultural Oddsmaker pie. And I can think of no better place to start than with Tony Romo's little black book. Now that Jessica Simpson is apparently out of the picture, who will be the next beauty to take his arm on a trip to Cabo? My bet is already down, but I'm not telling. OK fine, I say that he's waiting for Dakota Fanning ... although as Otter said in Animal House, "That could take years, and cost thousands of lives." Rumors and Rants runs down the more practical odds.
Let's see: Kelly Pickler is the favorite here at 5/2, although don't count out wily veteran Bridget Moynahan (20-1) or the workmanlike Alyssa Milano (50-1). But hey ... where's Rice Girl?
Handicapping Romo's Next Conquest [Rumors And Rants]
(ED. NOTE: We just got back from Media Day, and Kelly Pickler was there. There was no Romo.)
Comments
Troy Aikman: 1/2
I'm going to go with Jessica Simpson at 1/1.
[www.girlsgonesports.net]
"This is BULLSHIT! Pickler didn't win SHIT!"
- Clay Aiken
Too many brunettes for Romo's liking. He seems to like them blonde and/or dumb, preferably both.
T.O. 1/3
Jeff Garcia: 5/1
Zsa-Zsa Gabor 1:3
Wait, she's dead? Shit.
@Signal to Noise: Hey... the less they know, the more you can teach them.
@Jehovahs Witness Protection Program: She is?
The WNBA dancer guy: 1000/1
It's obviously going to be Wade Phillips' daughter.
i'm told jerrammy stevens is single
Balls, come back, we need your cultural oddsmaker. Don't make me beg, it will get ugly.
@Jehovahs Witness Protection Program: the less they know, the better.
Julia Stiles 9/1
Flavor Flav
Carol Channing: 100,000:1
Elisha Cuthbert wants to make the jump from the NHL.
Random Bus Station Skank 7/1
Why was Kelly Pickler at Media Day for the Super Bowl? Why?
Hanna Montana: Even.
@Lady Andrea:
She's singing the anthem at halftime of the Puppy Bowl. Hey, it's a paying gig.
I've decided that even if they contain no humorous information, editor's notes from Will always make me laugh. Largely because it's like him just dropping in to make sure all is well. He's like the hidden panel of judges that Dick Clark would throw it to on Pyramid.
Lisa Lampanelli: 1,000,000:1.
1:1 if you believe Michael Irvin
Ashlee Simpson, 10/1, Nichole Simpson, 100000/1
@Lady Andrea: who cares, as long as she brought along her two new friends.
Ashley Simpson 3:1
Ashley Tisdale 6:1
Joe Simpson OFF
@Gourmet Spud: for real? And what do they sing at the halftime of the Puppy Bowl? Because if she's doing the Nat'l Anthem before the Super Bowl, the SB could do better.
@Lady Andrea: You're trying to apply logic and reason to media day. Let's just move on.
Insert Porn Star Name Here 20/1
Tony Romo will be the man who saves Britney Spears.
@Lady Andrea:
Kidding, except about the "singing anthem at halftime" part. That was because I'm an idiot.
@Lady Andrea: Because Jordin Tootoo realized that she was as dumb as a bag of hammers?
Lindsay Lohan: 5:1
Funny Linsday Lohan Pics: 3:1
and the dark horse....
Dakota Fanning: 8:1
@13colonies: You're thinking of Tom Cruise.
LADYVICTORYUSA: 13:1, K?
@Jehovahs Witness Protection Program:
That just makes her a sleeper pick.
Barbaro 400:1
Hillary Clinton
5/1
@Yostal: You'd better have all those beer bottles cleaned up and that broken lamp fixed by the time he gets home.
@Gourmet Spud: oooh, Jordin Sparks is singing the Nat'l Anthem. That I am excited for, I enjoy her voice immensely.
Eli's Mom: 18:1
Jeremy Stevens will show up in Tampa Bay showing his teammates Romo's underwear.
@The Legend of Vincent Tremblay:
You mean a bag of tomahawks.
@Tracy Ham and Eggs as played by Walter Mondale: Dee Mirich: ∞:1
Affirmed
@Lady Andrea: Probably bc she's going to be on Are you Smarter than a Fifth Grader and Fox is promoting it.
I hate myself for knowing this.
@Lady Andrea: I'm guessing "The Bitch is Back".
Always a favorite: Martin Lawrence 2-1
Dana Jacobsen 10/1
Why does Kellie Pickler look like Celine Dion in this picture?
Super Bowl XLIII: 10,000-1
I can't believe no one beat me to this.
Yes.
@Jehovahs Witness Protection Program: SO move Zsa-Zsa from 1:3 to 1:5. Line still works.
@matt_t: you should hate yourself for knowing that.
Uma's with Oprah. Oprah's with Uma. Uma, Oprah. Oprah, Uma.
/still not funny
@matt_t: What worse, I know shes been on it already. Cause I watched it. Twice.
She is dummer then a tree stump. A retarded tree stump.
Erin Andrews 8/1 (he's famous enough for her I believe, at least these days)
@Tracy Ham and Eggs as played by Walter Mondale: And its all over youtube. She is a complete moron.
12/1 on Mindy McCready
I can't believe no one beat me to this.
Yes.
Really? You'd sleep with a hot blond?