Deadspin
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ...
• "Can't wait ... want to see every minute of testimony." — Brooklyn1006
Previous ESPN Featured Comment of the Day, plus a Featured Deadspin Response or two ...
• "What could the entire Rutgers five have been thinking when they had nobody crashing?" — Burling3636
• What could have the entire community of carnies been thinking when they banned the bumper cars from crashing? — fuckyoudodgemruinerofchildhoodstillbetter76 — Im A People Person. Who Drinks
• 经在它们中小企业服务器平台加入了"Gang of Four" 虚拟化功能? —从而让 — Fiddlingwhilejimromeburns Brought To You By Diebold
• What could the Academy have been thinking when they voted for Crash? — The Most Dangerous Game Of Grab-Ass
Comments
Can't sleep...clowns will eat me.
-bsimpson08
• "Can't wait ... want to see every inch of his testicles." -- NDBQuinn6969
I'm unemployed...and loving every minute of it! -- Brooklyn1006
"Can't wait ... want to be remembered as 'the kid who pooped his pants' for the rest of my life."
/BackOfClassBoy84
"Can't sleep...clowns will eat me." - BartmanSeason6
"What? This isn't C-SPAN?"
--NoSleepTil1006
"Can't wait... want to sing every word to Mony Mony. This Friday night, live with Klaus." -LADYVICTORYUSA
@tater:
I see.
"Can't wait ... want to learn all right grammars." -- PS1006
Can't wait...to eat every bit of my lunch. mmmm, lunch.
"Can't breathe...just wanted to eat every bit of this sandwich." - MCass1974
"Can't wait to be your sledgehammer...this will be my testimony" -Fruitcage1006
@Gourmet Spud:
Can't wait...to say that line first.
"Cant sit...dont want to bleed through my pants"
-Clemens1006
♪♪ Wait...wait...I never had a chance to love you! ♪♪
--WhiteLionRulz
CANNOT WAIT...DO WANT TESTIMOANIEZ
"DUFFMAN! CAN'T BREATHE!"
"Can't wait...to move out of my parents basement and be bare naked with a girl!" -- rotoleaguegeek260
Can't talk... eating." --Springfield1989
"My failure to use pronouns should be taken as further evidence of just how little I can wait."
"Can't yasee... Can't yasee.... What that women, been doin to me..." -MTuckerBAND
"Can't wait...want to touch the heinie." - happymadison07
Can't murder now...eating.
-treehouseofhorror4
"Can't... stop... talking... like... wounded... comic-book... character..."
- radioactiveman
• "Can't wait ... want to taste very inch of this baloney." - GizelleBigSausagePizza
"Can't wait...TBS is showing 'Roadhouse' 4 times this weekend." -IveGotAHardin
"Don't want to wait... For our lives to be over." --DawsnCrk1998
Can't wait...want to buy new Japanther album.
-BrooklynCoolDude
"Is that what you want? Is that what you need? Whore..." - choppingbroccoli587
Obviously this d-bag has never listened to Tom Petty.
"Can't wait...to see every second of Manos."--Horrorfan1966
"Caraway...its leaves add spice to soup." - Cookin247
Can't hardly wait ... want to see every inch of Jennifer Love Hewitt's cleavage. -Mandy1006
"Can't wait...until I have a life." --CSPAN3fan4eva.
I can't wait... to hear Nu Shooz' one hit.
--shortbus1986
Can't wait...to have these bamboo shoots shoved under every fingernail.
-namPOW1969
Can't wait....gonna have to shit at the bar again-cantmakeithomeintime.
Can't wait...
-DavidChaseFU07
Can't wait...for our lives to be over.
-PaulaColetrain
I can't...fight this feeling.
-reorulz
@Jefferson Short Bus: Damn - you beat me to it.
"Can't wait... until I see the next House debate on the Standing Committee on Public Accounts entitled "The Testimony of Deputy Commissioner Barbara George before the Public Accounts Committee".
- CPACcanadianpolitics
"Can't wait ... want to pee for every minute of press conference." -- FrnkDrbinBdyCondm
Can't wait.. the DC reading of GSTF in 8 days
♪♫
I can't wait (the way you love me)
I can't wait (the way you touch me)
I can't wait (I can feel it)
I can't wait (all over me)
I can't wait (come on baby)
I can't wait (please come home)
I can't wait (tonight)
I can't wait (whoo)
♫♪
--0utK@st
@Stev D: Great minds quote theme songs from cancelled TV shows alike, eh?
Can't wait...never been on a ship before--whitestarrulz
Can't wait...'Till the next dick joke, Martin Lawrence reference, or reading about someone shitting their pants - Dspin1006
Can't wait... to get the fuck off the field. - BelichickYourselfBeforeYouWreckYourself
@Chamomiles Davis: Spooky
Can't wait... want to see every blade of grass grow and every spot of paint dry.
Can't wait...for the weekend to begin...
MichaelGray
Can't wait... four minutes 'til Wapner.
--rainman89uhoh
"Can't wait... for the... Star Trek convention... so I... can... bust out... my... WilliamShatnerimpression!"
--BrooklynNCC1701
"Kant wait... to hear all about the categorical imperative!"
-philosophersbone69
"Can't mate ... my wife took every milligram of testosterone." -- RocketWithNoThrust
You know I can't smile without you
I can't smile without you
I can't laugh and I can't sing
I'm finding it hard to do anything
--manilowfan
Can't wait . . . for tomorrow, ALCOA can't wait. -fantasticfinishes80s
@The Legend of Vincent Tremblay: Nice (+ 47?)