Deadspin
It's a historic day, everyone, one whose importance almost slipped by us. Today, it has been one year since James Dolan saw "evident progress" from the New York Knicks and extended Isiah Thomas' contract. Boy, did that ever work out well.
What Would Oakley Do? has a grand roundup of what has gone wrong since that day, but allow us to step in the Deadspin Wayback Machine to do our own recap. Remember: Anucha Browne Sanders had already filed her lawsuit, one year ago. Dolan should have known. But if he had known, jeez, we would have missed out on so much fun.
• April 18: The Knicks finish the season 33-49, losing 15 of their last 19, and miss the playoffs.
• September 10: The Isiah-Sanders trial kicks off.
• September 11: Sanders testifies that Isiah, when discussing corporate sponsors, said, "Bitch, I don't give a shit about these white people!"
• September 12: Stephon Marbury admits to having sex with a Knicks intern in his truck. The intern was rewarded with a promotion.
• October 2: A jury rules against Isiah and the Knicks.
• October 19: Isiah forgets he traded away Dan Dickau.
• November 13: After a fight with Isiah over playing time, Marbury bolts on the team during a road trip.
• November 14: Marbury implies he has dirt on Isiah that he will use if he's not let back on the team. He is let back on the team.
• November 28: Reporters covering the team call the assignment "hell."
• November 29: The Celtics beat the Knicks 104-59.
• December 11: Isiah blames the fans for his team's struggles.
• December 19: Madison Square Garden ejects a fan for holding up a "Fire Isiah" sign.
• February 21: The chant "Fire Isiah" breaks out in Philadelphia.
There's much more of course ... but we only have so much bandwidth. Happy anniversary, everybody!
Mission Accomplished Redux [What Would Oakley Do?]
Comments
It's fitting that the phrase "Evident Progress" was used to describe Zeke's effect on the team since that same phrase sounds like it could be the title of a post-apocalyptic disaster movie.
Wasn't there an award somewhere in there? Some title bestowed upon Isiah in the last year, by some underground "web site"?
I dare anyone to top this bachelor party lineup:
Eliot Spitzer and Isiah Thomas.
That is all.
@Catalyst: Jerramy Stevens and Mark Chumura.
Considering that Alfre Woodard once played his mother in a TV movie, this could have turned out a lot worse.
March 12: Rangers players thank their lucky stars that Tom Renney has half a fucking clue.
If only Dolan had given this speech in front of a giant banner that stated "Evident Progress" on the Intrepid.
Mission Accomplished.
@Trot Nixons Hat: Fuck.
@Catalyst: Any two Kennedy males.
@Catalyst: Don't forgot Steve Kaplan. NYC really packs a punch.
FAIL.
@Catalyst: Kyle Orton and Pacman Jones
Bobby Knight on Sportscenter now, if anyone cares.
"Even I think he's doing a shitty job"
-Brownie
Seriously though, Isaiah must have something pretty incriminating on Dolan to not get fired. It's as if Dolan like a petulant little child who continues to play with a broken toy just because nobody can do a damn thing about it.
I'm not even a Knicks fan.
/sunt joke
@Catalyst: Tom Hanks and Adrian Zmed.
@Catalyst: Kige and Ken Lay.
"Are you girls the hookers?"
It's times like these that I thank my lucky stars that Mr. Davidson didn't want Isiah running the Pistons and went with JoeD instead.
@Catalyst: Wade Phillips and Jerry Jones.
@Catalyst: Rex Grossman alone the Sex Cannon needs no one else.
"Pssst...where the white women at?"
And for posterity...
+ Watch video
@Catalyst:
David Lee Roth and Slash
@Catalyst: Cristiano Ronaldo and Pacman Jones.
@Catalyst: Fred Smoot and the little person from Willow.
Howard Stern and Richard Christy.
@Catalyst: Rosie and Paula Poundstone
@Catalyst: Joe Buck and Billy Packer.
To Zeke's credit, it's been months since he viciously sexually harrassed a subordinate, so you could say things are getting better.
In hindsight, "evident progress" apparently is street code for "pictures of Dolan standing over the 12-year-old prostitute he had just beaten to death in Jersey".
@Catalyst: Herschel Walker and Herschel Walker.
Dana Jacobsen and Pac Man
THREADJACK
I'll say this for Spitzer: he has good taste: [www.nytimes.com]
/THREADJACK
@Dan Daoust: I dunno. That third picture says "transvestite" to me.
@Dan Daoust: Can we get the satellite trucks out from in front of the Capitol building, please? I don't need to be harassed by some asshole TV "personality" for a man on the street interview every time I walk to fucking Dunkin Donuts?
@Lady Andrea: M'Lady, I do not know what you are talking about. That's the best picture of them all.
@Dan Daoust: For $1k an hour, the guv could have done better.
@Dan Daoust: Ewww, Staten Island?
@Dan Daoust: The grammar in that story nearly killed me.
On another note, as soon as my brother gets here we are heading to Chubby's in Emmitsburg to watch the Mountaineers, hilarity may ensue.
@Dan Daoust: no way. The first one is good. The third one says "I'm a dude in a wig, look at my man-hands."
I'm in love: [www.nypost.com]
@Dan Daoust: For a grand an hour so is she.
Her song on My Space is just awful. Aretha my ass. LA, there's even a trannier looking pic there.
@Lady Andrea: I think it's Corey Feldman in drag.
And the first picture looks too much like Lynda Carter.
[www.myspace.com]
@Benny Hill Street Blues: it's not Corey Feldman, but there is some celebrity she's reminding me of in that pic. I just can't quite pull it out of my brain yet.
Nothing wrong with Lynda Carter, she was Wonder Woman!
@Dan Daoust: see, the white bikini pic is good. I was just commenting on the tranny pic.
Any one care to bet on over/under for Playboy feature?
@Fat-Fat: You know what I want? For you to give me my money back or send and actual woman to my room!
@Lady Andrea: "there is some celebrity she's reminding me of"
Jamie Farr?
What the hell is the matter with you people??? Fuck the grammar, fuck her MySpace song, and fuck her hands! Have you seen her tits?? Have you??? Shit!
Why the hell do I find it so damn funny that hookers have MySpace pages?
Dammit, Referee Pitman! They're people too.
@Chief Wahoo: she reminds me of Dean Cameron maybe: [imdb.com]
These Jericho plotlines keep getting goofier and goofier:
[us.lrd.yahoo.com]