
All right, well, our live blogging skills are weak, rusty and overall flaccid. But hey: You're at work, we all need a place to discuss the games, let's do it. Your games are Kansas vs. Portland State, Xavier Vs. Georgia and Michigan State Vs. Temple. After the jump, enjoy, if you dare. By the way, there will be some game crossover between this first set of games and the second set at 2:45 ET. We'll tell you the right time to zip over to the other post. Feel free to email us with your thoughts.
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2:33: So, Georgia lost. Because we're morons, we're gonna go ahead and try to live blog the 2:30 games too. Why? We have no idea. Argh. Argh. Argh.
2:27: OK, well, THAT WAS FUN. Since we left you, Kansas blew out Portland State, Michigan State mostly pulled away from Temple and Georgia is down by three with a minute-plus left. But you know this, because you're not stupid enough to get tournament updates from a site that can't get its servers in gear.
1:18: Honestly, continuing to update this live blog when not a single human being can see it is one of the dumber things we've done in our lifetime. And we've done quite a few dumb things.
1:15: Georgia is up by nine at halftime, Michigan State is up by 12 with two minutes left in the first half and Kansas is killing Portland State. And we are bashing our face against the wall. Thanks, Nibbles: We now have three completely useless computers.
1:08: True Gawker Media Server Down Related Confessions: We once urinated on the bed of a roommate who made us angry. We are not proud.
1:05: Michigan State is making a nice little statement for the Big Ten with a 11-point lead on Temple. The Big Ten got a bum wrap this year, in our opinion. It was top heavy, but those top teams aren't bad at all. We think they'll go 4-0 in the first round.
12:59: Tell us again how Gus Johnson supposedly isn't loved by CBS? They're actually using his Gonzaga SCREEEEEEEEEAM in their house ads.
12:54: More Gawker Server Down Related Confessions: We're a raging heroin addict.
12:50: Fun fact: Barack Obama won the Senate NCAA pool last year. He likes North Carolina this year. Of course he does.
12:46: You can say "dillweed" on commercials? Nice. Oh, and now Motorhead is showing up in AT&T commercial. Oh, Lemmy, man ... Lemmy.
12:45: Georgia is still up on Xavier. Let's not forget how Xavier probably should have beat Ohio State last year. They'd be devastated by a loss here, but nothing can quite compare to losing to an instate rival on some questionable calls. We're surprised they have the stomach to even watch basketball this year, after that.
12:41: Since the site is down, and no one can see this, time for confessions: We once killed a drifter! We cry when we watch Terms Of Endearment! Sometimes we just need to be held!
12:39: We're told the site is down right now. WHICH IS AWESOME.
12:37: From all accounts, the March Madness On Demand thing seems to be working OK, though there are some audio problems. If they don't start charging for that in the next five years, we will be flabbergasted.
12:35: Some credit for Tom Izzo. When he came to Michigan State way back in the day, we thought it would be a stepping stone job until he got to take over Kansas or something. He's now been in East Lansing for 13 years. That said, this year might be his worst coaching job. This Spartans team is as talented as any they've had since the national title team, but they just never put it together. They're down 7-6 right now to the Owls.
12:33: So much for that Kansas update: They're already up 11-3. These Vikings need a sex boat, stat.
12:31: Hello, Gus Johnson! How popular is Gus becoming? The freaking New Republic is writing odes to the guy. What, do they think he's Obama or something? He's got the Temple-Michigan State game, which means he'll have the Oral Roberts upset later. That should be fun.
12:29: The Kansas-Portland State game has tipped off. We've accepted that we're never going to get a 16 seed beat a 1 seed, but if it's gonna happen this year, it'll be this game. At the first TV timeout, by the way, Georgia is up 9-8. Clearly, that game's over.
12:25: We had a question about the three computers. Trust us: These are not quality computers. One of them actually runs on AA batteries, and requires BASIC programming.
12:22: We have a Bolerjack sighting. The man is sultry. Xavier is one of those teams people keep telling us the world is "sleeping on." They're already up 5-0, so clearly this will be a shutout.
12:21: The Georgia-Xavier game is tipping off. There's no way this happens, but if Georgia keeps this ridiculous run going and wins the NCAA tournament, the sports planet will implode. They should make them play all six games in one day.
More pregame: Talking babies will never, ever make us want to buy your product. Ever.
Also, it's nice to see the fiction that one of those guys from the Sonic hamburger ads could possibly have a girl in the car. Television reflects our dreams.
Pregame: We have three computers in the room right now, and then the regular game on our crappy, non-HD television. The early game we're most excited about it Xavier-Georgia, even though we have a feeling the Musketeers are gonna kill them. Will the Bulldogs still fire their coach if that happens?
By the way, Seth Davis is sporting his yearly visible erection. The guy loves his college basketball.













Comments
3 computers? Yep, Will's book must be selling well.
This is just as good as actually watching the games.
@Juancho:
Not that well - he still can't afford an HDTV.
c'mon Tommy fire up!
/nervous
@Juancho: And only 2 of them have porn on the screen right now.
The Georgia/Xavier online feed has no announcers, just crowd noise. It is fantastic.
All right, well, our live blogging skills are weak, rusty and overall flaccid.
A little Cialis and some steel wool will fix that right up.
@tomsearlyexit:
That boy never smiles, I tells ya.
"Is The March Madness over yet?"
-Nick Denton
Does the feed work in Firefox?
/sad
@The Fan's Attic: Of the two without basketball, 1 has porn and the other one has an Ankiel YouTube video playing on a loop.
I've got MSU-Temple, followed immediately by Purdue-Baylor. I am getting absolutely no work done today. My boss just walked by the office and asked if I was feeling sick, so why do I feel guilty going home?
For a guy back from the dead, John Ritter looks nonplussed.
And Bob Wentzel just broke out the "banging in the area" phrase.
@Southeast Jerome: Si.
Two dick jokes in the pregame and the setup post? BDD I'm sure agrees and approves.
Why does the former coach of Baylor who covered up that kid's death now play for Georgia? And what if Baylor and Georgia meet up in the second round?
come on Bulldogs!!!
@Southeast Jerome: Yes.
@Southeast Jerome: Works for me.
A tradition unlike any other.....Raftery, drunk in Round One. On CBS.
@Southeast Jerome: Mine didn't, so I used IE.
So...much...buffering...
Time for some GUS!
@ClueHeywood: They are claiming it is "audio problems". They are wrong.
Hey, they killed the Schrutebag!
[tap tap]
Is this thing on?
I'm back like cooked crack
What happened for the last hour? I think I took the wrong combination of pills.
NIBBLES IS DEAD
LONG LIVE NIBBLES
Hey! The site's back up!
And, xavier's finally decided to show up and play! (hopefully this didn't just curse them...)
Hey! Deadspin's alive again!
And we're back, looking in live at a dead website.
Hey, you're alive!
And an hour later, I'm back in...and to top it off I finally got announcers in the Georgia/Xavier game and they sound like they are talking through a tin can.
Hooray Beer!
FINALLY! It works again! My audio form CBS.com sounds like cyborgs calling the game.
After an hour and forty minute delay... how 'bout them Dawgs, kinda?
@bizzo5000: Somebody's gotta put the dead in deadspin.
Odd.
And yet Deadspin has STILL produced more the past two hours than Temple.
Deadspin: I am Lazarus!!
Xavier is using their mutant brains to force a comeback.
/comic book nerd
So Xavier was just pranking me. Now that they're playing basketball, time for that Elite 8 run I've been staking my manhood on.
There better be a good explanation for this! I had to do work, honest to goodness work. It was horrible.
Wow, the March Madness On Demand broadcast website is working better than Deadspin today. I would not have expected that.
And we're back!
Sometimes I just need to be held too.
this bliss guy is a hack
Since the site is down, and no one can see this, time for confessions: We once killed a drifter! We cry when we watch Terms Of Endearment! Sometimes we just need to be held!
Will! How could you? I mean, really, Terms of Endearment?
@Stev D: Nibblegasm.
March Madness and Will Leitch have single handedly taken down Gawker Media.
@BigTenObsession: I would feel less guilty about pretending to be sick over pretending to do work.
Since the site is down, and no one can see this, time for confessions: We once killed a drifter!
Cracklin' Rose get on board...
Looks like there were about twenty of us who have just been hitting the refresh button on deadspin for like 90 minutes.
@BigTenObsession: He cried because it hurt him to watch Jack Nicholson whore himself out in that film.
thanks for coming back Xavier
@MickelsonsManBoobs: and all of it is still not up. the patriarchy is holding jezebel down!
/dick (vagina?) joke.
I wish Gus Johnson was calling the Xavier game.
@Sandy Magic Jackson:
I also wrote "Coming To America" because of my intense hatred of immigrants.
That's it, Georgia. Play defense for 32 seconds, then give up the uncontested layup. I have no idea how you were 4-12 in the SEC this year.
HEY, FUCK OFF, HAMSTER.
having a job sucks so much more than sitting at home in my parents' house wearing pajamas and drinking alone.
...during the tournament.
Thank god they fixed the audio. Now I can listen to insightful commentary like, "Those floaters can be difficult ..."
Can they ever.