Deadspin
Well, that didn't take long. They were still flicking the cigarette lighter in preparation of lighting the Olympic Torch today in Greece when a protester crashed the ceremony, with what looks like a pirate flag. A rousing start on the 84-day journey in which the torch will pass through several locations, including the most dangerous and controversial of all; New Jersey. Oh, and also Tibet.
Disregarding public outcry internationally and within the borders of Tibet, the Beijing Olympic Organizing Committee reaffirmed its plans to carry the Olympic torch through Lhasa. The so-called "Journey of Harmony", the name given by the Beijing Olympic organizing committee, is scheduled to pass through 135 cities on it's way to the Chinese capital for the start of the Games August 8.
Well, this should be fun. Because already we've had:
• Steven Spielberg, who was to act as artistic adviser to the opening ceremonies, quit amid continuing Chinese involvement in the form of arms sales to the country of Sudan in their conflict in Darfur.
• Great Britain's Prince Charles has announced that he will not be attending the ceremony in support of the Dalai Lama. In London, the possibility of disruption by anti-China protesters became front-page news as the announcement of the deployment of 2,000 Metropolitan Police officers, marine and air support, plus mounted police along the torch's route to the town of Greenwich.
• Rioting in Tibet, in which the Chinese army is accused of shooting monks and burning homes.
• Concerns by athletes that Beijing's infamous air pollution will not only affect their performances, but perhaps, you know, kill them.
• Some European politicians calling for an outright boycott of the Games.
And if that's not enough controversy for you, try this: "What, Lassie? What is it, girl? Timmy's friend Quon Li is trying to douse you in marinara sauce?"
In China, the term Puppy Bowl has an entirely different meaning.
But back to the torch. One of its destinations is going to be San Francisco, a bastion of conservatism where of course things will go smoothly without a hint of trouble. From Scott Ostler's column in the San Francisco Chronicle:
San Francisco officials are planning to allow protesters to protest from "free speech zones." This could require some re-writing of official documents, such as the Constitution, which, some legal scholars would argue, designates the United States of America as a free speech zone.
And they're also taking the thing to the top of Mt. Everest, so I understand. Good luck hiring Sherpa guides for that.
Getting The Torch Through SF: Charge Of The Light Brigade [SFGate]
Olympic Flame Will Roll Through Tibet On Schedule [BrooWaHa]
Beijing Boycott? Don't Tell The Olympic Athletes [ABC News]
An Olympic Disgrace [Salon]
Comments
Keep that dirty torch outta my backyard, Wang!
So, what's the word for "clusterfuck" in about 30 different languages?
A protest is being planned at the top of Mount Everest by the bones of Rob Hall and Scott Fischer.
In Communist China, torch burns you.
Gunga galunga!
That's no ordinary pirate flag . . . it's the official Brady Quinn GAY pirate flag.
I am shocked, SHOCKED that no one in the IOC saw this coming when they awarded the Games in the first place.
San Francisco should have no problem with anything flaming.
Wait: that's pictures not from a protest. That's a stock-footage scene from Power Rangers!
Pirates always have the best flags.
Free-speech zone? Isn't that written right into the Constitution?
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances, whereas the Government reserves the right to allocate these ideals as it deems fiscally responsible or as pertaining to performance-enhancing drugs.
@Senators Lost Cojones: Certainly not the same IOC that let Salt Lake City bribe its way to a Winter Olympics.
Need a light, Tibetan self-immolators?
One smirre
@The Fan's Attic: +1
This is super-tellific!
@What Would Kornheiser Do?: They can't all be the yellow ranger.
If the torch is used to ignite a few non-violent tibetan monks we can really bring this thing whole-circle here, folks.
Yes, I think hosting the olympics is the perfect venue for showcasing China's great human rights record!
I think the addition of a tank dodging competition is great evidence of this.
@shea_guevara: It did seem as if Samaranch had a suspicious number of wives in his private suite.
San Francisco officials are planning to allow protesters to protest from "free speech zones" located in Modesto.
also, it's His Holiness the Dalai Lama.
Prince Charles may not be officially attending the ceremony but may show up disguised as a giant tampon.
The torch bearers plan on losing the protesters by putting it in the back of a camry and driving for 20,000 miles with the turn signal on.
You forgot the fact that Americans feel the need to bring their own food since eating Chinese food will result in positive steroids tests. No MSG, but lots of HGH.
The irony is that the protester would have gotten away if his sneakers hadn't been made in China.
The only thing China is guilty of here is horrible human rights violations and degredation of the environment. But, on the bright side, I did get a sweet beach cruiser bike for $130.
Dude, get the pledge pin ready... this guy is SO IN!
@Weed Against Speed:
"What would the Chinese Olympic Committee like me to do? Walk in the Opening Ceremonies? I can't walk in the Opening Ceremonies, I'M A....."
Why do Chinese officials keep saying the torch will arive in 10-15 minutes?
/hi-yo!!
On my computer, the journey of Harmony usually begins with a blowjob, goes through reverse cowgirl and doggystyle, and ends with a facial.
@Gourmet Spud: as always, +1.
Into Thin Air was a quality read.
The real winners in 2008 will be the 4th place finishers, who won't be getting lead poisoning from their medals.
What could possibly go WONG*?
/fixed
Not to get all heavy, but the poetic justice here is incredible. The more China tries to quash dissent and present a facade of order, the worse the chaos and disorder becomes.
It's enough to make you believe there's truth to certain Eastern religious tenets.
Mac would never let Quon Li eat Lassie. She might, however, try to off the bitch to impress Flicka.
You guys have got it all wrong. They used a burning Tibetan monk to light the torch. It's the circle of life.
Let's go Bucs!
Wait.. I can own Tibet without having to pay for anything?
If all this silliness ruins the vibe at my rythmic gymnastics party, i'm gonna be pissed.
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