Deadspin
Wow, that "ESPN the Weekend" sure looks like it was fun. Here's Stuart Scott getting all Chuck D on the karaoke mic with proper S1W accompaniment by Charles Barkley playing the role of Flavor Flav and, hmm, Mr. Belding from "Saved By The Bell" obviously filling Professor Griff's giant shoes.
Of course, Stuart Scott took some time away from bass-in-your-facing to meet and greet with some of his fans.
Also, one of Stu Scott's admirers, courtesy of Don Chavez.
Hmm. Wonder if Michelle Beisner was there?
Oh, and also, who's up for pissing the night away with Howie Schwab?
Must have been a good time. Schwab pulled out his sweet Nautica circus peanut-colored polo. He was also so drunk, he thought he was having his picture taken with So Taguchi.
Stuart Scott Is A Man Of The People [Don Chavez]
Stump The Schwab Likes To Party [Don Chavez]
(To make clear, by the way, these photos aren't, in fact, from ESPN: The Weekend. We're told they're even a bit old. That doesn't make them any less enjoyable. And why DOES Mr. Belding show up at all these things?)
Comments
Stu certainly has an eye for the ladies
Mr Belding will always be an accused McPoyle molester to me.
Good God, I was about to make a "Mr. Belding has really let himself go" joke, and then I read it was actually him. I guess that molestation suit brought on by the McPoyles in It's Always Sunny has really taken its toll.
Schwab = representing the typical St. John grad
The chick with Stu looks like she's drinking a Renuzit air freshener.
How does Belding pop up everywhere?
Were these photos taken at Pleasure Island? And wait, that's not So Taguchi?
Hey, when you're crunching statistics all day, sometimes you've just got to cut loose.
@Dead Air ummm Dead Air: +1
/huffs Pledge
Stu's favorite P.E. track? Caught, Can I Get a Witness?
I bet Schwab stumped her later that night.
@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies:
He's the FredEx of washed up celebrities.
Which one do you think the Schwab paid to service him?
Not picture: Dana Jacobson under a table blowing a Jesus look a like.
So did either of them in fact get stumped by the Schwab?
Schwab doesn't wear crazy throwbacks at all times?
@Dead Wrestlers Society: Meh...too slow on the draw. +1
@Threat Level: Midnight: and by "service" you mean bring a 96 oz porterhouse?
Howard "Howie" Schwab was found dead today at Disney. Witnesses report that at around 1:45am, after several Vodka Red Bulls, Schwab collapsed to the ground, clutching his chest, and recited some numbers that appeared to be the batting statistics for the 1984 Detroit Tigers.....
@UkraineNotWeak: Also not pictured...Tony Romo waiting for Belding on stage with a metal band
Did Schwab pull out his circus peanut-sized wiener too?
@Wyshynski: two minutes in the penalty box for you.
So throw your hands in the air if you were once wrongly accused of the Atlanta Olympics bombing, and wave 'em like you just don't care!
Barkley looks surprised to find Belding there. Must have thought he'd wandered onto an episode of Celebrity Fit Club
The girl with Stu loves her Carolina Panthers so much she got a Zubaz shirt.
A couple of observations about the second picture..
1) Stuart Scott's pants look like they were just recently not on his body.
2) The drink his "admirer" is holding looks curiously like urine.
Shall I continue or should we all just go throw up now?
@Rob Iracane: Oh, dude...
So did Belding try to hook Stu up with Lark Voorhies?
@Rob Iracane: So Taguchi marvelled at its size
...And Fuck Jugs Machines!
- Stu Scott
Hey Stu, you're only supposed to do that shirt tuck if you're wearing properly sized belts and pants.
And even then, it's fucking lame.
Is that guy behind Belding raising the roof or going for the high five?
@youstayclassy:
I also observed that the particular woman in the picture is a tad overweight.
/continuing second joke ran into the ground yesterday
Is that chick with Stu a Carolina Panthers cheerleader? If so, holla!
Fraternity men across the south are envious of the Stu Scott front tuck.
@Pittsburgh Sports and Mini Ponies: Also not pictured, Brady Quinn onstage with special guest, Bret Michaels.
Do I see Kwame Kilpatrick in the background?
ssdickbark.jpg
never such an appropriate file name
@Herbies_Wingman: Interesting. So Schwab is a Redman but Redman never heard of the Schwab. But they both dig the chronic so it's cool.
@ClueHeywood: Oops.
Oh Stu, you are soooo hip with just the front of your shirt tucked in. You could definitely pick up some college ass with that look.
What are the odds he's singing a Silversun Pickups song?
So that makes the hi-fivin' guy in the background Terminator X?
Nary a Hawaiian shirt in sight. Where Boomer?
Any guesses as to what rhyme Stu is dropping?
I'm thinking something by either Kriss Kross or Naughty by Nature.
Belding's getting bigger than a pregnant toad.
@Bobby_Big_Wheel: For some reason, I'd picture Stu singing some Johnny Rebel.
Those are some shiny fucking teeth on the girl hugging the Schwab.
Who's representing Terminator X ?
/saw PE, Beastie Boys and Murphy's Law 20 years ago. Still not sure how Murphy's Law factored into that show.
@shea_guevara: Onyx says SLAM!
@shea_guevara: You're overlooking the obvious: "Let Me Know" by Aaliyah.
@Bobby_Big_Wheel: Zero. In honor of Belding, he threw back some pills and belted out "I'm so excited!"
@BreakfastBourbon: beat me to it
@youstayclassy: Are you trying to say there is a "piss on you" situation going on?
@shea_guevara: Not Kriss Kross, Christopher Cross. Sailing, bitches...
Actually, that's The Schwab's wife on the left. The guy on the right, is the Filipino he hired to fuck her. The Schwab gets off on watching guys fuck his wife.
@Herbies_Wingman: I was thinking more like a gravy hose. Could be either a weird sexual position or an actual gravy hose. Or both.
@Bobby_Big_Wheel: +1, nicely done
did he loop the belt back through? Am I honestly seeing that?
Might as well have been braided
@shea_guevara: I was thinking 2 Live Crew...in keeping with the high regard tWWL holds for its female employess.
@SA:
Apparently, Stu has similar proclivities but classier execution.
@Bunkie Perkins: Needs more 'Bama bangs and some Oakleys (on croakies) to complete the look.
@shea_guevara: He's singing Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue by Crystal Gayle.
And Stu in the 2nd picture has obviously just had an "Oh, shit, a cameraphone!" moment after getting busy in the BK bathroom with Blondie.
Schwab's allowed outside the front door without some sports jersey on? What happened to LIVING YOUR GIMMICK, man?
Stu knows where the white women are at.
Pregnant women shouldn't be drinking.