Fiery NASCAR Crash Was The Work Of Scheming Terrorist Fire Ants
You always wondered if NASCAR drivers could turn right. Well, they can, but only once. The twisted remains of the vehicle you see here belonged to Michael McDowell, who rubbed the wall the wrong way (too hard, and straight on) in qualifying for this week's Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway. But not only did McDowell walk away from that crazy crash, that corporate sponsor couldn't be in better spirits. But was this crash foretold in a press release?
The Orlando Sentinel's Nuts & Bolts blog finds a media release it received before the race about pesticide for fire ants and how it'll help the drivers in Texas this week. The ominous part:
So what drivers have ants in their pants this weekend and what drivers are trying to avoid getting stung?
...
• Michael McDowell - According to several veteran drivers, McDowell needs to curb his "ants in his pants" style of driving. If not, he could find his car wadded up in a mound after a "racing incident"
The evidence is clear. McDowell's fiery demise was the direct result of fire ant. Nightmare fire ants.
Oh, and the video, via PaddockTalk:
Press Release Forecasts Fiery Crash? [NASCAR Nuts & Bolts]
Tyreek Hill's Injury Update Has Prediction Markets Buzzing
Bengals Have No More Excuses Entering the 2026 NFL Season
MLB Player Props Today: Best Bets for Wednesday, July 22
Why the WNBA Won't Monetize Sophie Cunningham's Viral Point
- MLB Best Bets: Jacob Misiorowski, Dylan Cease Lead Monday's Top Picks
- Athletics vs. Diamondbacks Predictions: Best Bets, Odds and Props for Monday
- UFC Fight Night Best Betting Picks for Du Plessis vs. Usman in OKC
- France vs. England Best Bets: Three Picks for the World Cup Third-Place Match
- Dodgers vs. Yankees Friday July 17 Best Betting Picks and Props
- July 17 White Sox vs. Blue Jays Prediction, Odds and Best Bets
- Three MLB Futures Bets to Make After the All-Star Break

