Poor Americans and their pissy weak beers.

It's another sign your country has become second class economic status, yes?

Did someone approach the investigative reporter and say, "You know, I'm just having a really hard time getting shit faced at the stadium...but I have no problem getting fall down drunk any other day. Why is that?"

It's family friendly. And it keeps the poor people away.

Really, how many of us have had to sit next to the Typical Drunk Asshole at a ballgame? And I am someone who enjoys the occasional pint of lager every now and then...

@Dr. Spaceman: Ah, now I see. It is all part of the plan.

Actually, MGD or High Life clocks in at 4.7% alcohol, making this act by the Padres even more egregious.

I've always been of the opinion that every ballpark should serve their thirsty fans 40's of King Cobra; only for the first seven innings, of course.

They should start serving Steele Reserve. What consumer advocate wouldn't be pleased with that.

@Dr. Spaceman: No kidding, family friendly. I had some usher come up to me at Petco the other day because I said "fuck" and there were children around. I wasn't drunk, didn't yell it, and the nearest child was two rows away.

I'm just impressed that they sell water with 3.2% alcohol.

So Sussman's perfect night involves Girl Scouts?

@Avian Bone Syndrome: I've had the same problem. Then again, I tend to buy the cheap seats directly in front of the playground, so that I am then able to afford a few more rounds of said weak-ass beer.

@44 in a Row: Apparently girl scouts involved in human trafficking of Pacific Islanders.

@Katni: I bet they figured they'd add the "n" and nobody would notice- good eye!

@Katni: I was along the first base side at field level. That was the first time I've ever had that problem, but it was also the first time I sat anywhere but in that "dugout club" box behind home plate.

Get the Hardly Boys on it, not the Hardy Boys.
"Oh, I'm getting a huge clue"

But do they serve alcoholic chicken yet?

@The Sports Hernia: Wade Boggs approves.

Hey great, it's more people who don't understand the whole 3.2% beer thing.

I'm tired of explaining it to people, but just know that it's not a big deal. Google "cereal malt beverages" and "alcohol by weight" to learn more.

@PeteJayhawk: No, you made the assertion, you do the work and support it.

/grumpy

Here in CO they only sell 3.2 beer in grocery stores. Which is why there's liquor stores on every street corner...

That's why you smuggle in a flask of Jack and buy an xtra large Coke. Anyone who buys beer at the stadium deserves to get fleeced.

@Crookednose: Can't believe it took 2 hours for someone to mention this. I think we need to hold a tutorial...

*insert sex in a canoe joke here*

In Oklahoma, the beer, by law, has a lower alcohol content. As if you needed another reason not to go to Oklahoma.

I've always suspected the beer at stadiums is really non alcoholic and the vendors are getting a good laugh over the idiots that spend a week's salary on too much of it then act belligerent.

this is one of many reasons I do my boozing in the parking lot before the game.

that article said that 3.2 beer is called "stadium beer" and is sold all over the country, additonally it said there are several states where ALL YOU CAN BY is stadium beer.

@Le Kangourou de Kataroo: dumb dumb dumb

@catdirt: See previous. NOMROM!

I brew my own beer and Wednesday I'm cooking up a pale ale that should clock in at just under 6% alcohol by volume. It's my own recipe so maybe I'll name it "Here's To You, Padres Fan Pale Ale".

/or maybe "Dick Joke Pale Ale"

Here in Canada, 3.2 per cent beer is considered de-alcoholized.