Deadspin
Our fear of a Cubs World Series title this year are well documented, and they're not doing much to assuage those fears right now: They've won five in a row and opened up a game-and-a-half lead over our Cardinals despite a creeping fear that this is as good as St. Louis is going to get this year.
And it grows worse: Today, the Cubs have a chance to win their 10,000th game, dating back to 1876. Ryan Dempster, who in addition to being a smooth talker and a ninja, has become our favorite Cub of several seasons, did what he could to keep the number in perspective.
"I remember when we won 5,000," Cubs pitcher Ryan Dempster said Tuesday. "What an emotional day that was. We were so excited — we realized we still had an uphill climb to 10,000.
"To be on the verge of that — I've been here since the first one, and to get to 10,000, it's a long, hard struggle, and I'm looking forward to it."
Still, this sure is a lot of good Cubs news, isn't it? It's making us uncomfortable. Let's see ... anything we can find to offset this? Oh yes: It's almost the 25th anniversary of the classic Lea Elia rant.
Ah. That feels better.
Comments
Didn't the Cubs pass 10,000 losses, say, in the Kennedy administration?
History's great ninjas:
*Ninja Gaiden
*Snake Eyes
*Beverly Hills Ninja
...somehow, dip5hit Ryan Dempster doesn't fit the bill.
I was waiting for another Barry Zito joke. And there it was, at 2:30.
Lets not get our testicles all wound up just yet, its a long season
I dunno who "Dome" is, but #1 there really doesn't like him and wants the world to know.
On a similar note, I was extremely disappointed to learn that the Staten Isalnd Ninja Burglar is not actually a ninja
Hey, Deadspin… Phone call from Ronny Cedeno's bat.
@The Diesel: I would've also accepted the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Shinobi, or this guy:
+ Watch video
@MattinglysSideburns: +1
Ziggy says Ryan Dempster has to win the World Series before he can leap.
If you are talking ninja, better consult the experts:
[www.realultimatepower.net]
@MattinglysSideburns: He prefers playing outdoors.
Really? You don't think Braden Looper and Kyle Lohse are the 21st century's Maddux and Glavine? I was really starting to get worried.
Cubs are to Deadspin what the Yankees are to ESPN.
I love the plan -
1) Post a story a day about the Cubs
2) Nobody gives a shit about that sorry lot of losers, but then, folks will find them horribly over-covered
oh wait, that's been WGN's gameplan for SIXTY YEARS!
@The Diesel: Don't forget about Sho Kosugi.
Dempster: Hey Carlos, I reckon... you know a lot about... cyberspace? You ever come across anything... like time travel?
Zambrano: Easy, I've already looked into it for myself.
Dempster: Right on... right on.
@GibbonJockey: You'd rather watch the Blue Demons and Blackhawks?
I just hope that netting is strong enough to withstand another wave of disappointment for the 100th straight season.
Did Felix Pie kick Lou Pinella's dog? how else does he keep getting screwed.
-not that I chose him over Fukudome in my NL-only fantasy league or anything.
I don't think anybody has to worry about the Cubs in '08, The Myan calendar has the world ending in December 2012 so there's 4 more years to wait.
@The Diesel:
No mention of the fireman from Ninja Warrior? Or the garbage collector? Those guys are the tits!
6 of their 14 wins are against the 8-12 Pirates.
The are 1-3 versus the 12-8 Brewers; 2-1 versus the 9-12 Astros; 1-3 versus the 11-10 Phillies and 2-1 versus the 9-12 Reds.
This is hardly THAT impressive.
But, yes -- the World Series is certain with for they are 3-0 versus the 10-9 Mets. Right?
Sheesh. Silly, silly Cub fans. Will they ever learn to just shut the fuck up?
The title of this post is funny if you imagine Dana Carvey saying it while doing his Regis Philbin impression but that kind of seems like a lot of work.
Does the ivy at Wrigley always look that horrid in April? That stuff looks like it should be growing on walls of Mordor.
Seriously, this is becoming the all cubs website. Even I am tired of them.
/may not be true
/also, I love the rant
I've already penciled the Cubs in for their usual June Swoon.
@shea_guevara: Yes, it greens up and fills in in May.
@Sheepblog: No. No they won't. And it will make the late-summer collapse that much sweeter.
[returns to cursing Cards front office for being misers]
No Marissa Miller pic?
one f bomb from Elia for every win
@Sheepblog:
Only 2-0 against the Mets and I believe the Mets are due to arrive in Chicago any hour now. I know their luggage made it there sometime on Monday.
@UkraineNotWeak: Yeah, I know the Mets were supposed to be there Monday and Tuesday, but for the last two days I didn't see anything resembling a major league baseball team in the visiting dugout at Wrigley.
@UkraineNotWeak: Here's to hoping that they left behind the decaying carcass that used to be Carlos Delgado.
@Weed Against Speed: Actually, not as difficult as I would have imagined it to be. Thank you, and Godspeed.
Fukudome is Taguchi, but he isn't So Taguchi.
Ah, the proverbial wisdom of the Cum Dempster.
@UkraineNotWeak: For the benefit of Gunners fans, what rhymes with "February"?
@shea_guevara: @crazyjoedavola:
Those efforts Monday and Tuesday were the worse of the season. Losing doesn't bother me as much as not bothering to show up.
@Weed Against Speed: Forgetting "The American Ninja" was our first mistake...and could be our last.
(Checks over shoulder and under desk.)
Whew. Safe...for now.
@UkraineNotWeak: Or just straight up taking a beating. You say po-tay-to, I say po-tah-to.
6 of their 14 wins are against the 8-12 Pirates.
****
so does that mean the Pirates are 8-6 against non-Cub teams? wow, I didn't realize they were that good!
@crazyjoedavola:
Delgado is just killing them in the middle of the lineup. No one fears him no more as he can't hit an inside fastball anymore. His awfulness has spilled over to Beltran who see nothing but off speed pitches and fastballs off the plate because teams know they can pitch around him. Maybe Alou coming back and batting fifth will alleviate that problem but Delgado is just a shell at this point.
The Cubs' 5000th win was on July 22nd, 1940, if my math is right. That makes it only 37 years before Dempster is born and a decent chance before his pappy is even born.
@J-No:
The awfulness that is Jorge Sosa had a lot to do with the final scores. Three run homer one game. Grand Slam the next. He's not long for the majors.
@UkraineNotWeak: But he's got the range and hands of a concrete sofa, so he's got that going for him. I hope they get a few weeks out of Alou anyway. And only 3 yrs and 11 months more of Castillo!!
@J-No: And then a big patch of it turns brown again after someone in the bleachers dumps herbicide all over it.
re: the Phillies
When are people going to realize that IBBing Ryan Howard to get to Pat Burrell is a bad, bad mistake? Ryan Howard leads the league in Ks right now. Pat Burrell leads MLB in average (.562, I think) with RISP.
MASTER NINJA THEME SONG!
@Sheepblog: And yet, the Cubs haters have been far louder than the Cubs fans, including in this very thread. But enjoy your freakout.
they've got the power, they've got the spee-eed..
to be the best in the National Le-eegue...
@Clare: This isn't the Daily Closer, fucktard.