Deadspin
For those reading who are teachers, it is that time of the year to volunteer your chaperoning services to one or more of your school's proms. There, your job is to make sure no one's hands fall below the belt line for illegal slow-dance fondling or, you know, make sure no students are having babies in the bathroom and depositing the slimey remains in the toilet.
More importantly, before the dance, you better watch out for some over-eager boys dropping their pants in an effort to creatively invite girls to the prom. That's exactly what happened to Huron High School senior Carolyn Campbell— and those boys paid for it.:
Kristoff Wennersten figured his prom proposal had to be one-of-a-kind if it would have any chance of being accepted.But the Huron High School senior never imagined it would result in a suspension for himself and 12 of his varsity lacrosse teammates, whom he recruited to help spell out the message at a school soccer match via their derrieres.
The players displayed the question, "Will You Go To The Prom With Me? Yes or No?" on their posteriors while mooning Huron senior Carolyn Campbell at a game.
If anything, this should give some would-be grooms a great idea for how to propose to their future brides.
Lacrosse Players Are Romantic [With Leather]
Comments
Epic leisure suit is epic.
Is that you in the picture Balls?
New Favorite tag: High School Impromptu Abortions. This could've been a tag LOOOOONG ago if we had known about Clemens banging Mcready years ago.
Not to beat a dead Barbaro, but here's an excerpt from Bissinger's Wikipedia page:
[en.wikipedia.org]
Based on his appearance on Bob Costas' HBO show, Bob Costas NOW he really really dislikes blogs and thinks they are worthless, and those that write them are "full of shit." He appears to be mentally unstable.
Bissinger is married to Lisa C. Smith and has three sons. He divides his time between homes in Philadelphia and the Pacific Northwest. He also rents a room in Bob Costas's basement to start up the famous website hotchickswithdouchebags.com.
Most recently Bissinger appeared on an HBO's Bob Costas On The Record to discuss the evergrowing sports media landscape. Bissinger then proceeded to make an ass out of himself and lose all credibility what so ever. His journalist tag has now been revoked.
Also, Big Daddy Balls, in an as-yet unverified blog post, alleged that Bissinger "fucks horses."
Bravo to whoever wrote this!!
No ifs ands or butts about it, this stunt should have won her over in the end.
I'll never forget the story of how my buddy proposed to his wife.
Im not going to go into too many details, but it involved a lot of wine coolers, a ring, some string and something called "teabagging"
Dad? Mom? No wonder I was conceived on prom night.
She gave birth to remains?
@Lupicas!XofullofBile: 1-to-2 that it was Leitch.
A tux with huge lapels is one thing. But a dress with big lapels takes a level of commitment rarely seen in bad prom-wear these days.
Duct tape prom suits/dresses > *
Considering that this was near Ann Arbor, I really hope this kid is one of Yostal's students.
The dancefloor was crowded, the bathrooms were worse, we chilled in your car and we drank from your purse...
Did she say yes, anyway?
@Secret Identity:
chilled, kissed, whatever.
Ah, who can forget their first impromptu high school abortion? Mine involved a dipstick, and old t-shirt, and two and a half hours on my stomach.
I often wonder if my girlfriend found a ride home that night...
"Robin Egg Blue? What are you gay? You take boy to prom?"
/actual questions posed to a high school friend by an elderly Italian man at a Tuxedo shop
I think Bissinger ate Nibbles.
If he had asked the women's field hockey goalie, she could've spelled the entire question on her ass alone.
@BigTenObsession: You'll make Iracane cuss at you. But I think you're right.
INVISIBIL GRAVITATIONAL PULL TO THE RIGHT
This was the night that finally sent Amber Waves into the porn industry for good.
I'm just a prom night dumpster baby
I got no mom or dad
prom night dumpster baby
my story isn't long but boy it's awfully sad
although I came from a hole
(although I came from a hole)
I'm singin' right from the soul
(I'm singin' right from the soul)
my fanny needs a blanket
and someobody to spank it
I miss my mom
but she's at the prom
/obligatory
Looks like it's about to be someone's first time.
They are just singling him out because he played lacrosse.
--Duke
Mike Nifong disapproves.
Sounds like these 12 dudes had to spend an inordinate amount of time writing on each others' asses
Kristoff Wennersten
-Sexual Organ Refreence
Where the fuck is Nifong?
Boy, "slimey remains" is just not used enough on this website...
@Weed Against Speed:
Surprised it took that long.
@Lady Andrea:
well, Will was just trying to be nice by not mentioning Buzz
HI-OH!
Is the gal in the photo a potential post-McCready rebound fling for Roger Clemens -- or is she a little too old?
I hope Kristoff was smart enough to be the "yes"
What a cheeky way to ask.
@martyfunkhauser: the guy with the "no" should have given her a "rotten pumpkin."
@Lupicas!XofullofBile: Folding money says Will wants that fixed. Not that it ain't true...
TORRES~!
I seriously think that is my uncle in that picture.
GAWKER IT!!! Why have you forsaken me? Iracane is the non-believer but my comments get feasted upon?
They allow Cupid to sling arrows in their buttocks anytime.
@Civil Negligence:
/throws tomato
@Lady Andrea: There are only so many JJ Redick stories a site can run, ya know.
@Lupicas!XofullofBile: Seriously, what uptight jerkwad would undo something like that?
Basement Nerd:*Pushes up glasses* Yes, I do believe that this Wikipedia article on H.G. Bissinger is inaccurate and riddled with "opinions." It is up to me that that article is restored to its proper dignity.
@BigTenObsession: John Terry "accidentally" gets his hands on more balls than Ronaldo.
The guy with No on his ass actually just had an "N" on one cheek.
She spilled on her prom dress at dinner and her quick thinking date rushed her to the biology department for a lab coat. The rest of the night went off without a hitch.
Well, whaddaya know, a 1-1 score.
I work at a library across from a middle school, we had to break up two kids having sex in one of ladies' rooms earlier this year. Good times!
"Witnesses were confused by the abundance of colons used in the sentence."
/threadjack
A Google search of Will reveals as one of the top choices a site called Can't Stop the Bleeding, which consistently rips into Will hard. Anyone ever seen this? The writer is a prick by the way.
/end threadjack
Ok, so "Will You Go To The Prom With Me? Yes or No?" is 33 characters.
13 players = 26 cheeks/canvases.
I can understand squeezing a question mark on at the end, but that still leaves 6 characters to squeeze in.
Unless, of course, you account for the 6 "O"s, and nature's way of presenting "O"s on cheeks...
/need to leave work now
if i comment, will the others reappear?
@Chamomiles Davis: +1 I could never figure out when to use those things either.
@Chamomiles Davis: Hisssssss
@LeagueofShadows: CSTB has had a long-standing dislike of Will/Deadspin. The reason why is somewhat lost to history.
@LeagueofShadows: [deadspin.com] Will is quite aware of it, too.
A nice prom story... my best friend was absolutely hammered before we went to dinner. At dinner at a pretty nice restaurant in Washington DC, he puked all over himself. We thought he was down for the night, but his second wind kicked in and he waltzed into the dance near the end wearing jeans and a t-shirt. I think his date was the most impressed. Anyway, days later, he brought the rented tux back in a brown paper bag with the puke all dried up and caked on, but still carrying the aroma of a fun evening out.
@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface: In linking to that earlier post I noticed that Kid Canada has a retroactive commenting star. Good for that floppy-headed bastard, wherever he may be.
@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface: Or, resurfaced. Thanks - I blame the cold medicine.
The last guy in line leaned forward while mooning, thus making it a dangling participle.
And a +1 to BDD at KSK for his appropriate response to the Buzzsaw.
That explains the forehead.
@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface:
I'm sure he knows, wherever he is.
@Secret Identity: So, do you think he'll ever come back???
@David Hume:
Or a semicolon.