Who Is This Old Man In My Online Baseball Schedule?

So I'm perusing the Giants schedule on their MLB site and look what I see on May 22. Apparently we're all going to the movies! I expect to see ads on the periphery of my baseball schedule, but within the schedule itself? It's just one small step from that to Doritos ads on players' uniforms. (They're already doing that with Zito; they have to make back that money somehow). Apparently this Indiana Jones ad is appearing on every schedule in the majors. What the fungus is going on?

The ad, is turns out, is for something called the Indiana Jones Legend Sweepstakes, which is not linked to the schedule pictures themselves. I didn't discover the site until typing "MLB," "Indiana Jones" and "money-grubbing whores" into a search engine. They make some tenuous tie-in between "baseball's living legends" and the new movie Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. As I understand it, you go to the site and sign up with all of your personal bank information to possibly win two tickets to see Baby Mama somewhere in Mexico. So there you have it: Movie ads in your baseball schedules. Has a man no refuge at all?

Oh well. It must be a relief for Jamie Moyer to look at the schedule and see someone older than himself.

• Could This Be The End For The Rays? I knew that this was a disturbing omen. Once terrifying and deadly, the scourge of the sea, it seems that the rays have just given up. Scott Kazmir returned for the Tampa Bay, but was cuffed around by the Red Sox on Sunday, exiting in the fourth inning of Boston's 7-3 win. Kevin Youkilis had four RBI for the winners. It completed a three-game sweep for the Stockings, who were swept by the Rays in their previous series.

• Jason Isringhausen Is Haunted By Your Derision. Jason Isringhausen was booed back to the stone age on Friday when he gave up a game-tying two-run, ninth-inning homer to the Cubs' Alfonso Soriano (The Cardinals went on to win, 5-3 in 11 innings). But on Sunday the closer dispatched the top of the Cubs' order in the ninth, the Cards winning 5-3. Albert Pujols had a two-run double in the fourth as first-place St. Louis moved 1 1/2 games ahead of the Cubs in the Central.

• An Angel On His Shoulder. Who has Joe Saunders on their fantasy team? Anyone? Despite giving up 12 hits, the Angels' left-hander improved to 6-0 after a 6-5 win over the Orioles. Gary Matthews Jr. and Torii Hunter homered in the first.

• It's Pat! Philadelphia kept pace a half-game ahead of the second-place Mets in the East as Pat Burrell had two doubles and two RBI to lead a 6-5 win over the Giants. It was Charlie Manuel's 500th career victory, which I celebrated with a Ding Dong with a candle in it.

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