Deadspin
It's not really a classic baseball brawl until a tubby Don Zimmer is thrown to the turf, but this'll do. It happened on Thursday at Safeco Field: After the Rangers' Kason Gabbard tossed a fourth-inning delivery at the Mariners' Richie Sexson at face level, Sexson charged the mound and clocked Gabbard with his batting helmet. Benches emptied, and a pileup occurred near the mound. Then, as you've seen countless times in Zorro movies, Sexson crawled out from underneath the pile as everyone else continued fighting above. Here's the video.
Of course all of this didn't stop the Mariners' scoreless streak from reaching 22 innings in a 5-0 loss. Texas used five pitchers in the shutout, and Ramon Vazquez had four hits, including a run-scoring double. Seattle starter Felix Hernandez had hit both Gerald Laird and Ian Kinsler with pitches earlier in the game.
I'll tell you though, in my opinion Sexson deserves to get brushed back, and here's why. There's nothing lower than someone who taunts fans with the old ball-on-a-string trick.
• Another Webb Gem. It's nice for Diamondbacks fielders to get an extra day off once a week. Brandon Webb is becoming completely monotonous and predictable, now 8-0 after eight starts. His first complete game of the season was an 8-3 win over the Phillies. He hit one batter, Eric Bruntlett, who was not aware that Thursday was Charge the Mound Day, and simply walked to first base.
• It Just Doesn't Matter! It Just Doesn't Matter! Jason Giambi, Johnny Damon, Robinson Cano and Wilson Betemit all hit home runs as the Yankees beat the Indians 6-3. Yet the guys at Camp Mohawk still get all the women.
• Who Lives In A Pineapple Under The Sea? First the good news, Florida Marlins fans. You're still in first, one game ahead of the Phillies. Now the bad news ... a scorpion has just crawled into your pants! Also, you're done playing the Brewers for this year. Matt Treanor had a three-run homer as Florida beat Milwaukee 7-2, completing a three-game sweep. This now frees the Brewers to head home to play the Cardinals, where a Mr. Will Leitch is waiting in the parking lot reviewing the Miller Park alcohol policy.
• Nobody Makes Me Bleed My Own Blood! Boston's Josh Beckett beat Detroit's Justin ZooVerlander in a battle of aces, 5-1, as the former recorded the 1,000th strikeout of his career (huzzah!). Kevin Youkilis had a two-run homer in the fifth and Jason Varitek a two-run single in the second. By the way, when your ace is 1-6, that usually spells big trouble.
Comments
Sexon wasn't crawling away from anything. He was going to fetch the chair from under the ring.
Hey Verlander, what's left to ponder?
When you strikeout as much as Sexton sometimes it's nice just to get out of the batter's box.
OH MY GOD!!!! THAT'S GRAIG NETTLES' MUSIC!!!!!
nyy is just fucking old. giambi, damon, pettite, big game mike. they need to get some fresh blood in that clubhouse. they need to be youthanized.
That's about the only thing Sexons hit all year.
Sexson deserves to get brushed back for A) Sucking, B) Acting like a bitch, and C) Being a grown man who goes by the name "Richie."
My pics of Indians-Yankees game yesterday:
[www.flickr.com]
One of the Sportscenter anchors called Brandon the "Webb Browser". Such a terrible nickname makes me wonder if ESPN is trying to pander to computer geeks, and if they will continue their efforts by dubbing Randy Johnson the "Big CPU".
No love for the Jays shitting the bed in the 13th? To be fair though the real damage was done in the 10th. This team couldn't score at Mustang Ranch.
...when your ace is 1-6, that usually spells big trouble.
"There's something big about my Ace, but it isn't trouble."
- Gary
Needs more Chan Ho Park kicks.
wasn't that pitch on the inner half of the plate?
The Placement Of That Pitch Has Vexed Me, Sir. Now We Shall Wrestle
C'mon, Rick, you don't have to work purple to be funny.
That was almost as interesting as a standard play in a regular-season football game.
Too bad about that pitch to your face there, Rich, but your night paled in comparison to mine, with me having to put up with an evangelizing Jew for Jesus in the row in front of me in the 500s at SkyDome.
Wanna sober up really quickly? Have a nut talk Jesus to you at a fucking baseball game.
ATTN:
Will whomever is in possession of Justin Verlander please return him to Detroit?
It's the end of the Tigers as we know them,
And I feel fine.
Sexson got more shots in than Lebron
Like to point out that I wore an Indians jersey to Yankee Stadium and cheered for my team yesterday, and no one was even the slightest bit impolite to me. Nice day at the ballpark.
@The Diesel: Wait! Where's Sexon going? He's getting a chair from under the ring. That's not legal! GIVE ME A BREAK!
/Gorilla Monsoon
@Brazil Thrill's Shot Was Blocked By KG: Mac Suzuki was ahead of his time.
What an absolute douche. The ball looked like it was over the plate or just inside just a little high not thrown at his head. Then he throws hil helmet. With all of that combined with the tight pants and man spanking going on I have no idea haw soccer get the "gay" label and not baseball.
Gabbard got JACKED UP.
/not really
@formerly Chief Wahoo: We were all cursing you out from home and/or work.
little known fact:
richie sexson has a black belt from the sweet valley high academy of bitch fighting
Verlander,
if fastballs were trees the trees would be falling
listen to reason
rehab is calling
By the way, when your ace is 1-6, that usually spells big trouble.
Barry Zito is insanely jealous of this win-loss record.
@pr0FF3ss0r_j3rkwh3at:
No.
Sincerely,
The keepers of the continuum transfunctioner
@formerly Chief Wahoo: I've never gotten anymore flak there than I brought upon myself. Heavy heckling sure, but no threats of violence.
@ltwinslow: Still beats a giant pussy move like keeping your cathers mask on in a fight. Now THAT is gay.
@Phony Gwynn: Not even the bitchiest name in baseball. There was a game in Atlanta featuring a Chipper and a Jo-Jo.
@formerly Chief Wahoo:
i don't anticipate such pleasantry on my july 4th pilgrimage
Sexson should have gone Izzy Alcantrara on Laird first.
+ Watch video
@EddieRebel: And a Corky.
@EddieRebel: and a Corky.
@DennyCrane: /shakes fist
@formerly Chief Wahoo: Yankee fans are going soft. 15 years ago I wore an A's coat to a game (not even an A's game) and almost got beat up. Good Times.
@Matt_T: /shakes fist
Gabbard is working a decent single leg. Sexson is about to give up the takedown.
@pr0FF3ss0r_j3rkwh3at: /shakes other fist
Jeter walks into a bar with A-Rod and Damon:
Jeter: "OK, shemales to the left. Non-shemales to the right. You guys divide them up anyway you like."
@Chief Illiniwek: Brain, looks like he's giving him a shot to the solar plexus, and, that there's gotta strain the trapezius muscle.
@formerly Chief Wahoo: I read that as catheter. I was confused.
@Matt_T: @Rob Iracane: Oh well, life goes on.
@Sarcastro: Real men leave their catheter in when they fight.
@Get Him A Body Bag, Yeah!:
WILL you be serious?
@Matt_T: @Rob Iracane: Kiss! Kiss!
Shawn Bradley wants to know how someone so tall could be such a pussy
@Mr. Bigglesworth: We're not soft, if you act like a douche (like the kid in an Ortiz jersey who stood and clapped for 2 straight innings) some drunk guy will probably scream obscenities or pop you. If you realize you're in your opponents stadium and just enjoy the baseball game, you don't get bothered (too badly).
My expeditions to Fenway have been, for the most part, pretty harmless.
@formerly Chief Wahoo: Nice work there. Unfortunately I got shafted on my tickets, thankfully before I made the 400 mile drive.
Andy Bernard thinks Jo-Jo is a pussy for leaving the game with 1 blister.
@MattMillenFanClub:
You want to keep hits
Down on the ground
Or Boston is going
To push you around...
@Rob Iracane: Your timing has created a very enjoyable comedy pyramid. Kudos to you, sir.
At least Brett Myers now has first-hand knowledge of what it's like to get knocked around. My God, is he terrible.
If it weren't for The Abomination That Is Adam Eaton, Myers would be my top candidate for "Phillies Pitcher I'd Most Like To Launch From A Trebuchet."
@Chief Illiniwek: Bruno Sammartino approves
@sir_pantsalot: Is that so they can't get the piss beat out of them?
/leaving now
Any Cards fans lurking in the thread? Going to be in STL next week and have a question.