Deadspin
It may be a short week for Deadspin, but it's a big week for minor league baseball promotions ... so drop your pants and fire a rocket for Minor Enterprise.
The glorious career of former pitcher Dave Rozema is cherished and studied by every drunkard, reprobate, fuckoff, ne're-do-well, rascal, rotter, tosspot, brawler, bounder, lout, louse, screwup, barfly, dipsomaniac, tippler, pug and toker who ever followed the Detroit Tigers. And by many, many other baseball fans as well. This is a man whose exploits nearly defy description, both on the field and off. But for all of his deeds and misdeeds, the crowning moment had to be on May 14, 1982, during a benches-clearing brawl between the Tigers and Minneosta Twins.
That's when, in the opening moments of the melee, Rozema charged from the dugout and attempted to deliver a flying karate kick at the Twins' John Castino. He missed, of course; injuring his leg so badly in the process that he had to be removed from the field on a stretcher. Rozema, who had a 3-0 record and a 1.63 ERA at the time, ended up on the DL and missed the remainder of the season; ruining what was shaping up as the finest season of his career. Any serious Tigers fan can tell you all about it, and probably give you a blow-by-blow from video accounts that have circulated on the Internet (until recently, when YouTube took them down on the orders of Major League Baseball).
But now you can relive the magical moment with the West Michigan Whitecaps of the Class A Midwest League, who will honor "Rosey" with the Dave Rozema bobblefoot doll giveaway on Wednesday, July 9. The first 1,000 fans through the gates at Fifth Third Ballpark will receive a Dave Rozema toy with real karate-kick bobblefoot action. I would suggest arriving early, as these will go fast.
How great was the 1982 incident in question? I found this account on the SpartanTailgate.com message board:
The footage of the fight was hilarious. At first base you had Lance Parrish holding a guy down to the ground with one arm. At the pitchers mound were most of the players, then suddenly from the dugout comes Rozie with a karate kick into the pile.....then you lose track of where Rozie is....then the fight clears and lying limp on his back on the mound is a battered Rozie.
And from the Motown Sports board:
I played a fantasy weekend with Rozema. He told a hilarious story of a teary-eyed Gibby talking to him on the stretcher, and promising to go out and win the game for him, a la Babe Ruth and the sick kid in the hospital. We were all rolling.
Kirk Gibson indeed won that game for the Tigers with a late home run. Gibson and Rozema were pals, got into all sorts of trouble together (amazingly, alcohol may have been involved), and in fact married twin sisters, JoAnn and Sandy Sklarski, in a double ceremony in 1985. Other facts from the Rozema file:
• Also in 1982, Rozema fell on a flask in his back pocket and needed 11 stitches in his hip, after Gibson had pulled a chair out from under him.
• Missed a team bus when he overslept after judging a wet T-shirt contest.
• Shoved a bar glass into the face of Alan Trammell, with Trammell needing 47 stitches near his eye.
• Finished fourth in the 1977 Rookie of the Year voting behind Eddie Murray, but won The Sporting News Rookie Pitcher of the Year award.
• During spring training one year in Lakeland, Fla., decided to wash his new car ... with Brillo pads.
Rozema recovered from his leg injury and had an 8-3 record with a 3.43 ERA in 1983, and also played on the 1984 Tigers team that won the World Series. He signed with the Texas Rangers in 1985 and retired in 1986, with career totals of 60 wins, 53 losses and a 3.47 ERA. But in one last hurrah, Rozema surfaced in 1990 on the roster of the St. Petersburg Pelicans of the Senior Professional Baseball Association, where he compiled a 2-0 record. The franchise folded in December of that year, and Rosie was never seen on a pitcher's mound again. But he will never be forgotten.
Other upcoming promotions:
• Kevin Costner And His Band, Modern West. Friday, July 4, Durham Bulls (Class AAA International League). I actually saw Modern West when they performed at Lake Tahoe last year, and the band is ... not good. But Costner is personable and good with the audience, when he's not singing, anyway. And he donated a bunch of money to victims of the 2007 Lake Tahoe Wildfire which destroyed more than 200 homes, so there's that.
• Competing As The New Hampshire Primaries. Friday, July 4, New Hampshire Fisher Cats (Class AA, Eastern League). The Fisher Cats will call themselves the New Hampshire Primaries for this game only, and wear special red, white and blue uniforms. Mike Huckabee to throw out the first pitch, where it will travel only 14.8 percent of the way to the plate (may not be true). [Thanks to Benjamin Hill]
• Jessica Simpson Day. Sunday, July 6, Grand Prairie AirHogs (Independent American Association). I'd rather attend Daniel Simpson Day (D-Day from Animal House). Whatever happens, don't go near the Joe Simpson kissing both.
• Awful Night VI. Monday, July 7, Altoona Curve (Class AA Eastern League). Last year's Awful Night V featured the mascot race which has no finish; a dry slip-'n-slide, and the ever-popular and frustrating helium balloon toss. Also there were liverwurst-and-whipped cream sandwiches at the snack bar. This year's is supposed to be "even Awfuler," according to the Curve. Just so you know.
What you missed last week:
• Wine Festival/Little League Night. June 29, Stockton Ports (Class A California League). Nothing sadder than a wine-stained Little League jersey.
